1107 (39) NO! NO! NOT AGAIN! REVISITED 50

39
2002
"As hard as it is for me to believe, my generation will be old—in a blink. And for the most part, the leaders, who captain our ship, today, prove too rich to heed the unmet needs of The 99%, who work too many hours to make ends meet; thus the underlying turbulence, resultant of imbalance, which causes rocking boats to sink—time and again.  Each time leadership refuses to open its eyes in time to change our course, we crash into the iceberg, which lies directly ahead.  Sounds negatively focused, right Mom?”

“Well, if you’re concentrating on downhill spirals, the fall of Rome, chopping off heads and sinking ships, that doesn’t sound very positive, Annie.”

Though Mom's response wins my smile, my tone remains serious as I reply:  “There’s a difference between focusing on the negative—and identifying a negative shift in our values.  I listen to people say:  We have no values, today.  That’s not true.  *We always have values—they just cycle through change—especially when desperation sets in.  If we look back into history (learn from it or repeat it) then we see a classic downhill pattern that persists when frustration of have-nots, too long ignored, erupts with a roar, and power changes hands.

Currently, we've reached the point in that classic struggle where our value of big bucks disregards brotherhood, which heeds compassion for the downtrodden.  Rather than honoring hard working teachers, police, fire fighters, and nurses, we worship sports heroes, rock stars, box office receipts, designer duds/bags/shoes and fast fixes, pausing our busy lives just long enough to pop pills while feeding fast food to our hungry-for-attention kids.  Athletic arenas, Maxi-theaters and shopping malls have become houses of worship. And on those rare occasions when we leave the mall and venture intuitively into the park, longing to commune peacefully with nature, we fear getting mugged.

So here’s my point:  Responsible values, offering a well balanced life, can’t be taught.  Responsible values are modeled.  And here’s what I find scary ... *Our current set of values has been undermining the strengths of our nation for at least fifty years. (A detailed soliloquy concerning that hot topic, later.)

While you and I sit swinging, side by side, feeling secure… we worry about terrorist attacks destroying our peaceful lives when deeper truth suggests that our nation is steadily self-destructing from within. When thoughts of Homeland Security come to mind, I wish we could instill a sense of emotional security within every child's mind by coaching parents to model self control, mutual respect and generosity of spirit while resolving conflicts in home after home.  If we can't coach today's parents then it makes sense to coach the parents (and world leaders) of tomorrow by teaching speaking and listening skills in school, beginning with 'feeling circles' in kindergarten ... continuing with required classes that offer communication tools, on a weekly basis, straight through high school.  If our aim is to minimize disorder at home and throughout the world then what could possibly trump a subject as peace evoking and empowering as Respectful Conflict Resolution?

*If the family is a microcosm of society, at large, then children, who are inspired to develop a deep sense of respect for each other while resolving conflicts, will transfer that skill to resolving conflicts wherever they go—namely conflicts, which are bound to arise, as one culture interconnects with the next.  In short, conflicting needs continue to clash until differences are thoughtfully and compassionately considered ... because deeper truth suggests that people are people wherever we go ...

Reality suggests that as issues, due to cultural differences, arise, assimilation requires astute listening and speaking skills on both sides.  If you tell me terrorists won't take required classes, I'd counter with:  Let's concentrate on your home and mine before attempting to pass the magic wand, I mean baton, throughout the world.  As education precedes change, and as change takes time, one day, minds on both sides of the ocean will open to the necessity of minimizing misperceptions and corruption, which persist for two reasons:  *Human nature has two sides.  And so far, we've not learned from history.  So, if insight into one deeper truth leads to another and if emotional reactiveness, caused by insecurity, greed and jealousy, trumps clarity then education is key to changing attitudes of 'me over you' to brainstorming, together until a well balanced sense of 'we' has had time to develop.  And if you ask:  Annie, if patience is a virtue then what causes your sense of urgency?  I'd reply:  Patience is a trial when young people, the world over, are dying in war after war.

It's also important to note that each time another culture emigrates to The U.S., immigrants face similar problems, exacerbated by prejudice.  Chinese sent money, earned by constructing cross country railroads, to support their families across the sea.  Jewish immigrants worked in the sweat shops of N.Y.  Irish maids scrubbed floors in Boston.  Russian Refuseniks, holding doctorate degrees in chemistry, flipped burgers at Mc Donald's.  As Hispanic parents do yard work, staff kitchens, and struggle with English, their children are educated in hopes of stepping up from poverty, as did my parents, whose parents spoke Yiddish, while sharing small apartments with other immigrant families before calling one room, behind the deli, home.  A quick glance through history, including my family history, suggests that every ethnicity confronts hard times as well as bullying, which continues to terrorize the minds of children in our schools, today.  Why?  Same refrain:  Two sides of human nature.  And with gunfire terrifying classrooms filled with innocent children, it's clear to me that in addition to gun control, one side of human nature needs formal training in taming the other.

*Seriously, leadership on every level preaches brotherhood while, in truth, we place blinders over our green-eyed envy while climbing the ladder of success by stepping on our brothers' backs.  And if you ask:  Annie, how do you think change for the better takes place, I'd smile while passing you the baton that has two words, which you may be sick of 'hearing', inscribed on both sides:  Know (both sides of) thyself.  Then, I'd open my mouth to ask you to mull over questions like this:

Which do you think big business holds out to The 99% ... Baton or club?  As in—I owe my soul to the company store …

As nary a person is born without an ego, do you know when your ego slips out to do your thinking, listening and speaking?  Do you know when your ego employs it's army of defense mechanisms to build a shield, which layers up, over time, until we can't feel compassion for those hopeful souls, who work as hard to climb the ladder of success as did our immigrant families when they arrived on our shores and suffered prejudicial abuse, as well?

Are you coming to comprehend which part of the human brain fails to hear another person's clearly expressed needs?  If you believe that people weep, rebel or depress for no good reason then might you be misleading yourself?  People of all ages and both genders weep, rebel, or depress when a barrage of confusion, frustration, and mixed messaged tension—all of which accompany a serious clash of needs—go unresolved.  I mean, whom do we expect our children to emulate when our value system is exacting of others while we're lax with oneself?  Lots to consider, seriously, right?

The time is ripe to remove our blinders and take a good hearted look into deeper truth, running rampant through our streets—roaring to be seen and heard—knocking down denial's walls.   Heed thy neighbor, named Defarge, bearing knitted gifts of socks and scarves, engraved with your name and mine—must we come to revolution, again?  Or shall we open an intelligent ear and learn from history in the nick of time?