2002
“Annie, do you know how effective communications became such a passion
for you?”
“I think so, Mom. When Barry turned two, I wanted to discipline in positive ways. I mean, think about my past: As a teacher, who loved other people's children, it's easy to imagine how naturally I'd love my own. And who in their right mind wants to yell at a child, who is deeply loved? If asked how my library in this arena accumulated, while I was in my twenties (more than forty years ago) ... well, my desire to grow ever more
mindfully self-aware, proves to be the crux of the story of my life, which I'm intent upon writing. So off the top of my head, suffice to say that my library evolved, one book at a time. As much of what I'd experienced and read had served to expand my perspectives, concerning love and life, I decided to weave insights, gathered along the way, into true stories, filled with examples from my life. And by way of writing these stories, I hope to offer people throughout the world a Cliff’s Notes version of
that which I've gleaned from a wide variety of professional points of view.
Look at it this way, Mom ... think of everything we’ve just discussed—doesn’t the fact that you keep asking questions validate this fact: The concept of division of labor suggests that everyone does not need to investigate this subject in depth in order to absorb that which I hope to convey, concerning the ways in which denial harms relationships by refuting reality? *As no man is an island, we each choose to study and disseminate some vital aspect of expertise for the betterment of the whole. For example:
Look at it this way, Mom ... think of everything we’ve just discussed—doesn’t the fact that you keep asking questions validate this fact: The concept of division of labor suggests that everyone does not need to investigate this subject in depth in order to absorb that which I hope to convey, concerning the ways in which denial harms relationships by refuting reality? *As no man is an island, we each choose to study and disseminate some vital aspect of expertise for the betterment of the whole. For example:
*Just as we don’t need to attend dental school
to learn to take good care of our teeth, everyone doesn’t need to grow deeply analytical
to expand our understanding of both sides of human nature—the self assured, compassionate side vs. the insecure, power struggling side. What we do need to do is to remind ourselves that our relationships are
like our teeth: Just as the teeth we don't take care of may fall our of our mouths, relationships we don’t take good care of may fall out of our lives.” (Though I'd like to take credit for that witticism, all I did was expand upon a funny insight that I'd read on a poster, tacked to the ceiling in my dentist's office while I was reclining in the chair—taking good care of all of my teeth, so none would fall out! J)
Once Mom and I enjoy another laugh, Ms. Motormouth has no intention of winding down—
*“I believe that most people would like to offer the most positively focused, emotionally supportive, productive parts of their minds to those we love. And with that belief in mind, here's what I hope to inspire by baring my life: I hope to inspire a desire to work consciously at listening to each other, attentively. I hope to impart a healthy curiosity, concerning depth in emotional intelligence. I hope to entice others to muster the courage to peel away at denial's walls, uproot the wounds of our egos and peer honestly into hot spots, which spin our minds out of control. I hope to encourage the patience in others to 'peel the onion' while working toward detecting self defeating patterns, so that lasting changes, which strengthen our relationships, develop—because surface changes are short lived. I hope that as more of us expand the narrowness of our personal views, life and relationships may improve. Mom, are you aware of how often I bring the war between the sexes and sexuality into conversations?”
*“I believe that most people would like to offer the most positively focused, emotionally supportive, productive parts of their minds to those we love. And with that belief in mind, here's what I hope to inspire by baring my life: I hope to inspire a desire to work consciously at listening to each other, attentively. I hope to impart a healthy curiosity, concerning depth in emotional intelligence. I hope to entice others to muster the courage to peel away at denial's walls, uproot the wounds of our egos and peer honestly into hot spots, which spin our minds out of control. I hope to encourage the patience in others to 'peel the onion' while working toward detecting self defeating patterns, so that lasting changes, which strengthen our relationships, develop—because surface changes are short lived. I hope that as more of us expand the narrowness of our personal views, life and relationships may improve. Mom, are you aware of how often I bring the war between the sexes and sexuality into conversations?”
“Yes. And to tell you the truth, I'm perplexed about that, too.”
“Well, in many ways I believe ‘The Pill’ has led
toward the family’s undoing.”
“The birth control pill? But, Annie, I know you believe in contraception. In fact, you've relied on the pill, yourself.”
“Yes, Mom. All of that is undeniably true. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with taking the pill. I'm saying the discovery of the pill led to changes, that undermined family values, which had grounded society's sense of stability for thousands of years ... As my stories unfold, I plan to offer examples of the ways in which The Pill led us into a maze, where fear of abandonment and confusion reign supreme—to this very day. And as we wander, blindly, ever more deeply into this foggy maze, denial continues to undermine our family value system. If change (and human nature) has two sides, then common sense suggests examining sudden, and thus unexpected, changes that cracked the foundation of family life during the decade of the sixties ...
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