2012
The land phone rang
No one was home
Message was left
At the movies
Cell phone vibrated in my handbag
Didn't feel it, could not respond to it
Message was left
Forgot to turn the ringer back on
Not in the habit of checking voice mail
Which does not always signal its presence
Came home
Not in the habit of checking for messages, right away
While readying dinner the land phone rings
Listening to the voice of a loved one
Hearing sound waves crackle into my ear
Why crackle?
Instinct senses foreshadowing of flat voice tone—
Suggesting a cacocophy of emotion being suppressed
This awareness catalyzes my reaction of apprehension
I listen as words clarify no accidents, no one is ill
My second reaction is relief; however flat voice tones signal
My antenna to listen attentively to what's to come
My third reaction is sadness as I absorb unexpected news
(Though ... the unexpected is to be expected if we remember this:
People do not know each other as well as we think
As my mind continues to absorb details, I realize that
Flat voice tones indicate much more than pain held at bay
Now my fourth reaction, compassion, wells up
First, compassion for one
Then as awareness into classic truths deepens
Wells of compassion cancel negative attitudes
Which might have cast judgments
As I continue to listen, non-judgmentally ...
Three wells of compassion fill to overflowing, and
This is just the beginning of what's to come, because
Heartfelt pain will soon be shared to differing degrees
By everyone who cares
And with insight into the fact that
Compassion inspires generosity of spirit
I sense that this shared sadness will pinpoint no victims or villains
And here is why I believe that to be true:
The flock with which I choose to fly
Has come to accept this fact:
At all ages, people remain vulnerable to falling under denial's spell ...
Where confusion, causing delusion, reigns supreme
And since each of us, who choose to fly together
Must work to make sense of that which we do not yet understand
About love, life, each other, and ourselves
My next half hour on the phone is spent engaging
In a conversation, which nurtures this awareness:
With positive focus and hope intact, reflective thought
Into today's confusion and pain will flash a series of insights into
Vital aspects of love or life that we do not yet understand
However, with time, insight will offer understanding
And with understanding, new paths will unfold where
Where today's unmet goals will be achieved
And by the way—if, perchance, you think that that insight came from me—
Think again, because I was the one who had listened appreciatively to
The centeredness which had clarified insight into deeper truths
From within the positively focused mind that spoke by way of
The self-disciplined mind, which had conveyed
Generosity of spirit, into my compassionate ear
Then, as sad news travels fast, next thing I knew ...
Those who make up our flock drew together, knowing that
The sum of our strengths serves to ease the pain, which is
Certain to deepen once the initial shock to the brain wears off—
And as our flock has worked to absorb insight into positive focus
Negatively focused judgments will not be cast for this reason:
When fate slams into one of us, decisions are made that steady us all
So rather than seeking a villain to blame for pain that hits one and all
Trains of thought track patterns, which by-pass put downs in favor of
Channelling our minds toward seeking solace by channelling deeper truth
This does not mean that pain will not strike deep as
A sense of irretrievable loss penetrates more deeply into our minds
As it is our habit, during times of loss, to flock together
We help each other embrace a greater sense of clarity into reality
Than each member of our flock might be able to grasp, alone
Upon convening, ego's pretense is placed in a time out chair
And in this way do we consciously seek release from pain by
Mustering the humility to communicate vulnerabilities
In open, honest, insightful and thus, healthy ways, rather than
Erecting defensive walls, behind which pain is
Suppressed, repressed, depressed or dismissed as no biggie
You see, if there's one train of thought, which with this this flock—made up of
Uniquely differentiated individuals—agrees, it is this:
We understand that flinging pain, back and forth, talking smack or
'Dissing' others by putting them down is self defeating and thus,
Self destructive for everyone concerned ...
And now that flights are booked and arrangements have been made
It is time to pack and connect with birds of a feather who've learned to work
Consistently to ease each other's path by flying together
With positive focus as our guide during life's most painful times—
Your friend, Annie
PS
As to relating the story of inspiring courage in my eleven year old, who'd felt whipped by gang mentality—led by an insecure bully—the comment box went unfed. No problem. I'll just let that story unfold in its rightful place when Annie is a young wife and mother, intent upon consciously conjuring up 'simple' plans in hopes of inspiring the minds of her children to absorb personal strengths, such as openness, trustfulness, and mutually respectful, positively focused speaking and listening skills, which she'd not developed until adulthood.
As to whether I'll show up over the next few days
—Once again—
Your guess is as good as mine ...
Today is the start of a new day, for us all
And as each day progresses, we each discover
Whether fate will offer up smiles or frowns
And so all I can say at this time is this:
With positively focused compassion, patience, and
An open minded sense of hope for the future intact ...
Insight, which expands narrow perceptions, will result in
Change for the better, because—it's always darkest before the dawn
And if insight doth not dawn, today then tomorrow is only a day ...
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