Still swinging ...
“Annie, what do you mean when you say life is fluid?
“Hmmm. How can I best explain what fluid means to me? Okay Mom, this may do the trick: *Let's say life is divided into four seasons for good reason: Spring is the innocence of childhood; Summer offers a hot, juicy introduction to adulthood; Fall ripens toward maturity; and Winter provides the wisdom to assemble a wealth of knowledge in hopes of seeking inner peace—otherwise, we'll grow ever more disgruntled and wizened right to the bitter end...
Next, let’s divide the four seasons of life into twelve months. If each 'month' symbolizes a new decade then as life marches forward each person can visualize where he or she stands as an infinitesimal part of humanity's bell shaped curve within the grand scheme that Mother Nature has ‘planned’ for planet Earth, as a whole. With each passes decade we can ask ourselves, 'Do I stand in the middle of the herd, as I did as a child? Have I become a leader, who pulls some part of that bell shaped curve forward, while at the same time, I'm digging in my heels, afraid to budge toward deeper truths in some other aspect of life? Where am I pulling up the rear, balking at every step I'm forced to take—in fear of the day when the grim reaper plucks me off the time line, and those younger or more healthy than I carry on? During each stage of a person's life span, personal growth can be monitored by identifying where we stood in the bell shaped curve, yesterday vs. where we stand, concerning changing values, today." Looking at Mom and seeing that my explanation may be exacerbating her confusion, I wish for Socrates' brevity and choose a new line of reasoning.
"Let's say I see my spirit as playing a brief but influential role within the capricious nature of humanity as a whole. Let's say I believe humanity will continue to perform miraculous (and ridiculous) acts, long after I’m gone. Let's say no one wants to grow into a grumpy, wizened, old prune. However, in order to grow wise, I'll need to direct my mind toward listening, attentively, when the spirit of sages whispers down from on high, because—I'm in the process of transitioning from autumn into the winter of my life as we speak. A there's lots ahead of me, concerning the next stage of life that I've yet to experience. Knowing that, I choose to grow ever more aware of absorbing insights, which may increase the likelihood of evolving into a loving and eagerly welcomed, gracious old lady.
Next, let’s divide the four seasons of life into twelve months. If each 'month' symbolizes a new decade then as life marches forward each person can visualize where he or she stands as an infinitesimal part of humanity's bell shaped curve within the grand scheme that Mother Nature has ‘planned’ for planet Earth, as a whole. With each passes decade we can ask ourselves, 'Do I stand in the middle of the herd, as I did as a child? Have I become a leader, who pulls some part of that bell shaped curve forward, while at the same time, I'm digging in my heels, afraid to budge toward deeper truths in some other aspect of life? Where am I pulling up the rear, balking at every step I'm forced to take—in fear of the day when the grim reaper plucks me off the time line, and those younger or more healthy than I carry on? During each stage of a person's life span, personal growth can be monitored by identifying where we stood in the bell shaped curve, yesterday vs. where we stand, concerning changing values, today." Looking at Mom and seeing that my explanation may be exacerbating her confusion, I wish for Socrates' brevity and choose a new line of reasoning.
"Let's say I see my spirit as playing a brief but influential role within the capricious nature of humanity as a whole. Let's say I believe humanity will continue to perform miraculous (and ridiculous) acts, long after I’m gone. Let's say no one wants to grow into a grumpy, wizened, old prune. However, in order to grow wise, I'll need to direct my mind toward listening, attentively, when the spirit of sages whispers down from on high, because—I'm in the process of transitioning from autumn into the winter of my life as we speak. A there's lots ahead of me, concerning the next stage of life that I've yet to experience. Knowing that, I choose to grow ever more aware of absorbing insights, which may increase the likelihood of evolving into a loving and eagerly welcomed, gracious old lady.
“I can't picture you as an old lady, Annie. In fact, I can't believe how old I am! I sure don't feel as old as my years. When I awaken and look into my mirror, I can't believe the person, staring back is me." At this, Mom looks too serious to chuckle, so she gets back on track with, "Annie, it's not like you to believe that people can't grow old graciously, naturally.”
“I know, Mom. Here's what I'm trying to say: Even the most gracious amongst us continue to face lessons, left unlearned—especially when it comes to accepting loss too painful to bear. So many of the elderly feel depressed."
"Yes, that's true. Remember how depressed Dad was when he couldn't achieve physical challenges that had set him apart from other men his age?"
"I do. Once, while he and I were discussing his despondency, I told Dad that I'm determined to age like you. I remember Dad offering me a small, sad smile, while replying, "I hope you can, Annie. Your mother is quite a woman."
"I miss him so much; it hurts, every day."
"Me, too, Mom."
"If I'd known what had caused his depression, I would have reacted differently."
"I know what you mean, Mom. It's natural to feel that way, but it's impossible to relive what's past. The best we can do is to transfer insights like that to situations that, at first glance, are difficult to understand, today."
"Annie, I thought you were going to explain what you meant by life is fluid."
"Yes, that's true. Remember how depressed Dad was when he couldn't achieve physical challenges that had set him apart from other men his age?"
"I do. Once, while he and I were discussing his despondency, I told Dad that I'm determined to age like you. I remember Dad offering me a small, sad smile, while replying, "I hope you can, Annie. Your mother is quite a woman."
"I miss him so much; it hurts, every day."
"Me, too, Mom."
"If I'd known what had caused his depression, I would have reacted differently."
"I know what you mean, Mom. It's natural to feel that way, but it's impossible to relive what's past. The best we can do is to transfer insights like that to situations that, at first glance, are difficult to understand, today."
"Annie, I thought you were going to explain what you meant by life is fluid."
"Whoops, sorry. Once we dive in deep, it's easy to get off track. So where was I? Oh yes. *I was using the time line to track where we stand as forerunners or laggers while values change so slowly as to be imperceptible, day by day. Let's put the timeline aside and picture ourselves standing on a moving sidewalk, like at the airport, but with this difference: The moving sidewalk at the airport moves straight ahead. The moving sidewalk I'm conjuring up inside my mind, offers us a fork in the road, from time to time.
*Each time we approach a fork in the road, where yesterday’s values clash with today’s, we can remind ourselves of this fact: Regardless of which side each person decides to choose, we all continue to move forward on the time line into foreign territory, as one stage of life transitions into the next. And here's why that's true: Every next stage of life thows experiences onto our paths, which startle and unbalance our sense of self in ways that we'd not suspect. We think of ourselves as wise old owls whose feathers get rustled when our hard earned nests unravel. Knowing this to be true of every generation, I’ll continue to seek knowledge and guidance, no matter how many birthdays I celebrate or how astutely on target my past decisions may prove to be. Each time we approach a new stage of life, we become a beginner, all over again. And when confusion hits, concerning vital aspects of my well being, I'll seek guidance.
*Each time we approach a fork in the road, where yesterday’s values clash with today’s, we can remind ourselves of this fact: Regardless of which side each person decides to choose, we all continue to move forward on the time line into foreign territory, as one stage of life transitions into the next. And here's why that's true: Every next stage of life thows experiences onto our paths, which startle and unbalance our sense of self in ways that we'd not suspect. We think of ourselves as wise old owls whose feathers get rustled when our hard earned nests unravel. Knowing this to be true of every generation, I’ll continue to seek knowledge and guidance, no matter how many birthdays I celebrate or how astutely on target my past decisions may prove to be. Each time we approach a new stage of life, we become a beginner, all over again. And when confusion hits, concerning vital aspects of my well being, I'll seek guidance.
One day, while visualizing myself, standing on the time line, I saw myself as an infinitesimal speck within the greater, animal kingdom. From that day on, I began to view planet Earth as being my forest or jungle. This insight into LIFE enabled me to differentiate between those who seek to understand their self defeating traits and those who fear the truth. And as I've come to accept the fact that life is short, meaning that my body will provide my spirit with transport for a limited time, I've chosen to wrap my attitude around this fact: *At some point in time, every person, alive (including me) stumbles into accidents, prejudice, bias, misunderstandings, misperceptions, insensitivities, and unfair misjudgments, as well as countless forms of blind miscarriages of justice which may include: undiagnosed illnesses, chronic injuries, which devil us, daily, thus interfering with heartfelt plans—and then there's the toughest plague of all, that of loved ones' sudden, untimely, inexplicable deaths. Having come to accept all of that as part of every person’s life—I’ve decided to remain fluid, concerning that which fate forces me to handle against my will." At this, Mom looks skeptical, so I expound a bit more: "Fluidity depends upon cultivating a fertile mind, which differentiates between when to swim upstream and when to go with the ocean’s flow—when to ride out a rapid current—and when to dive in deeper than ever before—followed by accepting one's need to soak up the sun, while resting from stress and strife, floating in an inner tube, confined within the safety of a languid, back yard pool and then, having recouped a storehouse of energy, there are times to dig in my heels and take a courageous stance, based in the strength of personal conviction backed by knowledge. Over all, I work toward strengthening my resolve to solve conflicts with patience, rather than hardening my heart to the vulnerabilities of others.”
“Annie—if you try to tell me that by remaining fluid, nothing in life is going to upset you then I'd say—that's nuts.”
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