(Upon re-awakening, this morning at 8am, I chose to read this post, written when I awoke with need to reach for my iPad in the dark of night. Upon review, I found many trains of thought to be so complex as to be too convoluted for my sense of clarity to remain easily on track, exemplifying what happens inside our brains when two or more contrasting functions vie for processing space, simultaneously, and in order to show you how disorienting to conscious clarity a subconscious sense of inner conflict proves to be, from time to time, I'll leave this post unedited, at least for right now. So, with hopes that this example of mental complexity doesn't overwhelm your processor with dizziness , good luck and here goes ...)
Yesterday's insight-driven train of intuitive thought left me wondering how innately intelligent the human brain actually is concerning our lymbic system's subconscious capability to come up with defense mechanisms that prove so astute as to be less self-endangering than those which had catalyzed my adrenal glands to release such a volumous production of adrenaline into my bloodstream as to cause my heart muscle to tense while simultaneously pumping so fast as to overwhelm my ventricle, resulting in paralyzing a portion of my heart so as to decrease my overstimulated blood flow from rushing so quickly into and out of my auricle as to threaten my pulmonary artery (which feeds blood in need of oxygen into my lungs) with bursting ... and as conjuring up that visceral image did not serve to calm my think tank to relax into a self-soothing ohhmmm, today's insight-driven train of intuitive thought has inspired my conscious connection to intelligence, grown knowledgeable, to feel intrigued, resulting in my sense of wholeness ending today's post with ... Hmmmm ... because the more I come to understand and absorb about the complex functions of the human brain, the more I come to respect the host of ways that my brainquest chooses to strengthen my innate connection between my processor and my sense of emotional intelligence by consciously placing my defense system's heightened sense of self-protective-over-reactiveness in time out right on the spot so as to assure my latent fear of being abandoned that I've worked to develop the awareness and readiness to create a balance between emotion and logic so as to take good care of my loved ones while meeting my personal needs, as well. And the more I work to understand the contrasting nature of my brain's complex, interactive functions and the more I voice my ability to create change for the better within my self image by absorbing knowledge about my defense mechanisms, guess what happens? I grow ever more likely to balance my thought processor during eruptive episodes of PTSD so as to stir my intuitive powers to calm an over-reactive attitude of OMG to feel Hmmm, because I've developed such a deep sense of respect for my think tank's current connection to emotional intelligence as to offer any sudden eruption of inner conflict sound reason to relax any latent fear that severs my subconscious connection to personal safety by scaring me to feel as senseless as I did at three, and as long as I don't lose a balanced sense of control over my conscious mind I find myself capable of inviting zohhmmm to feel at home just as was true when I blacked out after buckling my grand daughter into her car seat ... and perhaps, today, during our ride home after spending close to three weeks with our kids on the coast, my storyteller will sense readiness to describe that experience (which took place two days before we drove to the coast) in which my brain bent over backward to protect my precious grand daughter from harm before I took care to meet my need to thrive, as well ... and as I write and Post, I have no doubt that you'll come to see why these past three weeks compelled me to pull the best of my inner strengths together to work wholly in Will's best interest and my own, as well ... for several reasons, I'm choosing to publish this post in the raw before time to review and edit is mine, so though complex thoughts may prove in need of simplifying, hopefully insights offered will make sense ...
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