1468 (B's a buzz'in). EXPANDED VERSION OF THREE STEP PLAN TO REGAIN SERENITY

At times when I feel incapable of

Completing a simple task

Tis not a question of 'finding time' but

Rather a matter of instinct alerting

My think tank to bide its time until

A relaxed sense of inner peace has

Been regained, and that proves especially
True in the aftermath of a sweeping
Sensation of deeply suppressed
Emotion, which having threatened to
Knock down my wall of denial, would have
Released a deeper truth that, if exposed

Would free an inner conflict that

My defense system had thought best to

Suppress, and if my fear of exhuming

That emotional conflict, which has remained
 Buried alive, conjoins with my original fear of

Emotional complexity, left unresolved

During childhood, then we can see why

Thoughts of that simple task served as
The catalyst, which swirled my think tank into
Such a chaotic state of disarray as to render

My processor too confused to connect

The dots in such a logical fashion as to

Comprehend this fact:  Today's

Train of intuitive thought is making headway
Toward spotlighting two fears, which
Having conjoined into one, have 
Spun my connection to logical reasoning
Just beyond my grasp, suggesting that
My doubled fear of emotional combustion
Feels too complex for serenity to handle, and
As our defense systems have no concept of
Time or space, my head spin had not been able to
Clarify how one fear had exacerbated the other
And thus does today's string of intuitive
Insights heighten our conscious awareness to
Comprehend why thoughts of that simple task
Spun my sense of personal safety back to
A terrifying time when, at the vulnerable age of
Three, I experienced the terror of
Irretrievable loss, which had devastated
Every member of my extended family, suggesting that

A significant portion of my current reaction
Is directly related to subliminal flashbacks from
My distant past at which time my brain's potential
To remain securely connected to logical reasoning
(During times of personal crises) had not
Yet developed, and thus doth insight cajole us to
Consider this fact:  Over my lifetime
Unresolved fear of being swept into
The eye of an uncontrolled emotional tornado
Has made a time-traveler of my brain, most especially
When a split second flash of subliminal
Awareness (stimulated by a current event) zooms
Back and forth across my personal timeline
Conjoining adulthood with early childhood within
Milliseconds, spinning my conscious awareness toward
Re-experiencing an anxious child's fear of
Explosive emotional complexity, which, over the years
Has grown to assume such spectral proportions as to
Stun my adult mind with sudden spikes of adrenaline-laden

Anxiety that make me feel as if a near and present danger is

Closing in, suggesting my mind reeling with feeling
The dark threat of The Spector of Death's chilling breath on
My neck, and with today's string of insights clearly in sight

My newfound sense of clarity, concerning this week's

Head spinning fear of explosive emotion associating with
Irretrievable loss, answers why no amount of
Ohhmmm has relaxed my processor's intermittent 

Swirling sensations of anxiety over these last couple of

Days, highlighting the reason why my intuitive

Intelligence is presently working to consciously
Disconnect childhood's subconscious fear of death from
Today's adult conscious absorption of
Logical reasoning by choosing to call upon

Creativity to reorganize my think tank by
Conjuring up this simple three step plan of action:

Step one:

Offer myself the soothing patience that

I'd graciously gift a friend

Step two:

Choose to set the simple task aside

Until natural waves of emotion no longer

Threaten to overwhelm my peaceful

Connection to logic

Step three: Repeat steps one and two

Until thoughts of completing

This simple task match

My calmed sense of internal

Readiness to confront

A deeper truth concerning fear, which
Much to my surprise, has, by way of
Creative writing, managed to slip out of

Subconscious storage, and is

Presently sitting quietly in my lap
Staring me openly in the face, and

Having worked to know the intelligent

Adult whom I prove to be from

The inside out, I feel no secreted reason for

Anxiety to strike ... right now

And considering the fact that

Over these past two days my

Brain's consumption of energy

Has been trained upon patching

Cracks in my wall of denial

Thank goodness my power of

Intuition called forth creativity to

Divert my attention away

From fear in favor of penning this

Post, suggesting that once

My defense system lowered its

Guard, that stealthy little

Deeper truth slipped out of

Its subconscious hiding place

Through a crack in my wall of

Denial, and as one string of insights

Leads to the next, Lo and behold

We come to see how today's

Well-organized train of

Intuitive insights has come to

Spotlight this fact, as well:

Over these past few days

My connection to logic was only

Disrupted when specific thoughts

Concerning that simple task, aroused

Waves of deeply repressed

Emotion, which, proving as strong as

The night tide crashing darkly against

The shore, made me question why

Readiness to accomplish this

Simple task, peacefully, was not mine

Thank goodness, intuitive intelligence

Guided my conscious mind to identify

That insight concerning childhood's fear

Of flooding emotions exacerbatinG
My anxiety before my adult mind could
Consciously summon the inner strength
Necessary to confront emotional reactions
That proved so complex at the age of
Three as to have left me feeling utterly
Overwhelmed with grief of irretrievable loss
And thus is it plain to see why any thought
Relating to a simple task, which
Threatened to tap into depths of pain so
Great as to stimulate my survival instinct to
Call forth my defense system to stuff

Anything that felt remotely similar to my
Original feeling of emotional abandonment 
Right next to my diminished self worth, behind
My wall of denial, and thanks to my

Current understanding of

The eruptive nature of PTSD

I have sound reason to consider

This fact, as well:  The mere thought of

That simple task threatened to expose

All of those negatively focused, emotional
Reactions, which proved far too potent for

Ohhmmm to appease until 

My connection to intuitive intelligence

Beseeched my sense of compassion

To draw forth as much patience as

Proved necessary in hopes of

Re-adjusting my calm, courageous

Rebalanced sense of

Adult connection to clarity, which

Ultimately served to offer my natural

Sense of readiness the go-ahead ...

Ohhmmm

Ohhmmm

Ohhmmm

Hmmmm ...

While editing this post

Many memories of happiness

Directly related to completing

The simple task at hand

Arose to soothe waves of fear of

Emotional turbulence, thus

Calming the waters through

Which my life raft has just

Paddled, and as joyous memories
Reduce fear, significantly, I feel

The tide lapping against my shoreline

Much much more gently, today

Than had proved true in

Times past when my understanding

Of serenity as a choice had

Not yet developed, so though

The unedited version of

This post had originally ended with 

No green light, as of yet ...

Later in the day, intuitive thought
Empowered my conscious awareness

With successfully completing this

Simple task, suggesting that

Once childhood fear had reason to

Stop stalking my adult sense of emotional

Maturity, my conscious awareness

No longer felt overwhelmed by

Spiking anxiety, so once again

I have reason to thank

Intuitive intelligence for calling upon

Creative thinking, which spotlights

Insights that brighten my adult mind to

Expand toward feeling so securely
Grounded as to inspire today's

Emotionally matured, self assured

Sense of wholeness to embrace another

Personal growth spurt, which has offered my

Think tank an angle of repose that

Has enhanced my ability to relax while

Fulfilling a heartfelt goal ... OHHMMM