So good to travel to celebratory weekend
So good to be home ... :)
Even so, did not drift off to sleep easily, last night
Amalgonation of restless emotions unsettled my mind
Calm during turbulence, transitioning into emotional reaction
In the aftermath of inner conflict has become my m.o.
Not as in calm before storm
But rather calm and aware of puzzle pieces aligning until
Bigger picture appears
At first, when I could not fall asleep, irritation arose
Then insight hit, inspiring my train of thought
To circle this positively focused track—naturally:
Before the wedding weekend
My heart thought to contact and thus connect lovingly
With every member of my extended family
This means that, at first, certain people I love
Were wrapped in loving compassion ...
Then, having embraced their sadness
My awareness opened a separate compartment within my mind
Which allowed my heart to embrace heartfelt excitement and joy
Concerning the happiness of wedded bliss that was about to take place
In truth ...
Juggling both sides of emotion presents mind and heart
With quite a balancing act ...
And if asked how this came to be, I'd reply ...
Over these past twenty years
I've been absorbing Dr. David Schnarch's theory of differentiation
Meaning that my compassion and empathy for another person's pain
Does not weigh so heavy on my spirit that
I suffer their pain as though it was my own
It was hard work for me to get to this place of
Healthy, heartfelt compartmentalization where
My mind accepts the reality of both sides, in fact
This healthy, heartfelt compartmentalization is what pulled
The emotional tides of my love toward
Washing empathy over expressions of sadness until
My emotional pull toward another's joy offered my mind sound reason
To express pure sensations of heartfelt connection
With everyone involved
And though it's true that expressions of differentiation could not help but
Swing my emotions back and forth throughout the weekend ...
Upon returning home, I realized that
My expression of sadness and happiness had collided, at last
Within an environment of privacy
Which allowed me to consciously vent my emotional swings
And once insight cleared my mind as to the fact
That it was no longer necessary to control my reactions
I gave myself permission to lay wakeful and
Go with the flow of which ever rolling emotion
Was taking precedence ... moment by moment
And by accepting this healthy amalgamation of emotion to emerge
Naturally from deep within my core, eventually, all of me relaxed ...
Which is why insight emerged, again, in that
My heart, mind and gut felt, clearly and unequivocally that
I'd been able to take good care of everyone in my family ...
Including myself! :)
If asked how I know my perception lines up with reality, I'd reply
Certain people told me so, individually ...
And more than words can convey ...
I saw the truth of heartfelt connection emanating, eye to eye ...
Twelve years of heartfelt strife ...
Twelve years of mindful work ...
Twelve years of positive focus interwoven with hope ...
Twelve years of hitting sticks that kept me sane
By allowing me to release repressed temper in healthful ways :)
Culminating in joyful togetherness ... without so much as
A word of blame falling heavily on any one person's head ...
And once again, win-win does not mean all is well ...
Win-win means a spirit of mutual respect has been re-established
Suggesting that when the spirit of leadership looks forward
With attitudes of inner conviction holding hands with peaceful co-existence
That which remains unhealed will most assuredly resolve ...
If not today, then one day, little by little ... step by step ...
And once again, I celebrate making rabbit ears, believing full well
That the day will dawn when insight circles round
And everyone involved will take responsibility for
Mending and maintaining family ties, all around ...
And as sciatic pain is now clamoring for me to lie down
Your friend, Annie, leaves you, today
Reveling in the magnetic strengths of love and self trust grown ...
Sure, patient ... deep :)
PS ... So call me addicted to hope if you must ...
Better hope than any other drug, n'est pas? :) :) :)
Sent from my iPad
So good to be home ... :)
Even so, did not drift off to sleep easily, last night
Amalgonation of restless emotions unsettled my mind
Calm during turbulence, transitioning into emotional reaction
In the aftermath of inner conflict has become my m.o.
Not as in calm before storm
But rather calm and aware of puzzle pieces aligning until
Bigger picture appears
At first, when I could not fall asleep, irritation arose
Then insight hit, inspiring my train of thought
To circle this positively focused track—naturally:
Before the wedding weekend
My heart thought to contact and thus connect lovingly
With every member of my extended family
This means that, at first, certain people I love
Were wrapped in loving compassion ...
Then, having embraced their sadness
My awareness opened a separate compartment within my mind
Which allowed my heart to embrace heartfelt excitement and joy
Concerning the happiness of wedded bliss that was about to take place
In truth ...
Juggling both sides of emotion presents mind and heart
With quite a balancing act ...
And if asked how this came to be, I'd reply ...
Over these past twenty years
I've been absorbing Dr. David Schnarch's theory of differentiation
Meaning that my compassion and empathy for another person's pain
Does not weigh so heavy on my spirit that
I suffer their pain as though it was my own
It was hard work for me to get to this place of
Healthy, heartfelt compartmentalization where
My mind accepts the reality of both sides, in fact
This healthy, heartfelt compartmentalization is what pulled
The emotional tides of my love toward
Washing empathy over expressions of sadness until
My emotional pull toward another's joy offered my mind sound reason
To express pure sensations of heartfelt connection
With everyone involved
And though it's true that expressions of differentiation could not help but
Swing my emotions back and forth throughout the weekend ...
Upon returning home, I realized that
My expression of sadness and happiness had collided, at last
Within an environment of privacy
Which allowed me to consciously vent my emotional swings
And once insight cleared my mind as to the fact
That it was no longer necessary to control my reactions
I gave myself permission to lay wakeful and
Go with the flow of which ever rolling emotion
Was taking precedence ... moment by moment
And by accepting this healthy amalgamation of emotion to emerge
Naturally from deep within my core, eventually, all of me relaxed ...
Which is why insight emerged, again, in that
My heart, mind and gut felt, clearly and unequivocally that
I'd been able to take good care of everyone in my family ...
Including myself! :)
If asked how I know my perception lines up with reality, I'd reply
Certain people told me so, individually ...
And more than words can convey ...
I saw the truth of heartfelt connection emanating, eye to eye ...
Twelve years of heartfelt strife ...
Twelve years of mindful work ...
Twelve years of positive focus interwoven with hope ...
Twelve years of hitting sticks that kept me sane
By allowing me to release repressed temper in healthful ways :)
Culminating in joyful togetherness ... without so much as
A word of blame falling heavily on any one person's head ...
And once again, win-win does not mean all is well ...
Win-win means a spirit of mutual respect has been re-established
Suggesting that when the spirit of leadership looks forward
With attitudes of inner conviction holding hands with peaceful co-existence
That which remains unhealed will most assuredly resolve ...
If not today, then one day, little by little ... step by step ...
And once again, I celebrate making rabbit ears, believing full well
That the day will dawn when insight circles round
And everyone involved will take responsibility for
Mending and maintaining family ties, all around ...
And as sciatic pain is now clamoring for me to lie down
Your friend, Annie, leaves you, today
Reveling in the magnetic strengths of love and self trust grown ...
Sure, patient ... deep :)
PS ... So call me addicted to hope if you must ...
Better hope than any other drug, n'est pas? :) :) :)
Sent from my iPad
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