As post 477 offered answers to riddles that prove profound, let's review those riddles, concerning the creation of change for the better, before my stories unwind:
If it's true that we all develop a social veneer (Ms. Cheerful, Mr. Logical, Ms. Wisest-of-all, Mr. Blue-I-don't-care-life's-a-bore) and if we mistakenly believe that the persona, which we unknowingly parade in public, is our true self then we fail to know the person, hidden behind our defensive walls, deep inside.
If we deny-deny-deny that both sides of human nature exist within oneself then we have no clue as to when we're not being true to the person, who exists at our core.
Riddle:
If we're blind to those times when we're acting out a role then what does that mean?
We lie to ourselves about who we are, what we feel and whom we've hurt.
Riddle:
If we lie to ourselves about owning inner strengths (which prove to be half baked) then who else do we lie to?
Everyone—including those we love.
Riddle:
If, during life's scary or painful times, we move our 'baggage' into 'Denialand' then what might Mother Nature feel need to say, one day?
*Mother Nature would likely say: Excuse me, my dear, but denial is not meant to be a permanent residence. Denial is meant to be a temporary state of numbness when a shot of reality proves too painful to bear. By gifting you with a defense system that casts a temporary spell of denial over your senses, I am offering you time to build an emotional bridge, upon which you'll work to develop the inner strengths necessary to ensure that your spirit Is not swallowed up by an experience, so terrifying as to cause you to feel like you've tumbled straight into Hell. This bridge is meant to keep your spirit from drowning in fear until your strong foundation of inner strengths, which your mind has the potential to develop, is fully baked, and once you've made your way, step-by-step, across this bridge, which diminishes fear by calling forth the courage necessary to peel away layers of denial in order to face life's harshest realities, head on, your newfound sense of wholeness will feel ready to welcome your true self to embrace each next stage of life with clarity as your greatest ally. And thus, my dear, if we liken Denial to a hotel, please be aware of not abusing the gift of this temporary, altered state of mind by seeking asylum within a fantasy of your own making for such a long time that you mistake the fairy tales that you unknowingly weave for the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.
Riddle:
*If your foundation has not yet been fortified by fully developed inner strengths and if denial extended over most of your life then what happens to the state of your mind?
Once permanently ensconced within 'Denialand', you'll lose control over your thought processor's conscious ability to distinguish between today's reality and yesterday's fantasy of your own making.
Riddle:
*Can you tell the difference between being victimized as kids and victimizing ourselves as adults?
Whereas kids are truly vulnerable victims of fate ... adults, whose inner strengths remain half baked, feel need to hide vulnerabilities from themselves behind a persona, which seeks admiration for strengths that in truth, have not yet ripened. And anyone who does not see this adult as being 100% fair and square and strong and right will be viewed in an ever darkening, negatively focused light, because another person's sense of clarity threatens the persona's false identity, and as soon as the persona feels threatened with being unmasked, this person's insecure ego, feeling personally attacked, will loom so large as to usurp control over both sides of that individual's brain. Once the ego controls the entire think tank, any opposing point of view will stir up yesteryear's subconscious fear, and thus does opposition, viewed as dangerous to the ego's fragile sense of safety, catalyze anxiety to strike, suggesting why tension suddenly electrifies the very sir we breathe. As a result of stirring up subconscious fears, buried alive, the insecure ego is instinctively programmed to lock the thought processor's smarts behind the defense system's wall, freeing every bit of mental energy to concentrate on fleeing, freezing in place or fighting as though to save one's life, suggesting why any well-meaning offer to help is utterly ignored, and in this way do close-minded (fearful) adults, haunted by unhealed pain, festering subconsciously ever since childhood, unknowingly victimize themselves. In short, Mother Nature gifts the child's undeveloped strengths with the asylum of denial, and then, fate repeatedly offers adults reason to quest ever more deeply into their past in hopes of liberating the portion of the mind that is in need of clarity, concerning reality, in order to function in a well balanced manner, today.
*As my stories unfold, you'll see what happens, during each stage of life, when I unknowingly move my baggage, stuffed with subconscious fears—born of unresolved, emotional injury—out of the realm of my conscious awareness into Denialand. And as long as emotional baggage remains buried within a subconscious, hazy maze, you'll watch my ego call upon a host of defense mechanisms to create a false sense of safety by encasing my negative attitudes, along with personal vulnerabilities, within denial's thickly layered, defensive wall. As this defensive wall continues to thicken, over time, I'll lose sight of negative attitudes and deep set fears, buried alive, inside my mind, thus lessening my chance of identifying which inner strengths have remained half baked until my persona's facade has been stretched so far as to begin to crack, and eventually, story by story, we'll arrive at the stage of my life when my sons are pretty near grown, and baggage, locked deep inside my true self, explodes straight through my defensive wall of denial, at which time, I'll find myself staring into my mirror, forced to come face-to-face with the fearful stranger, who, had been hidden from my conscious mind since I was three, and at that turning point in my life, my ego will no longer be able to call upon my defense system to create a fanciful Disneyland of my life, because once my wall of denial comes down, I'll not be able to deny that all of me is shaking with fear while my brain's state of utter confusion is busily, consciously engaged in questioning what the heck is going on, because I don't yet know that my power of intuition will arise and go to work, figuring out how I came to be in this unimaginable state of being while coaxing my smarts to carve a path, leading toward making my solitary way through my very own, personal hell.
In stories, describing my young adulthood, you'll watch me unconsciously deny the fact that both sides of human nature, which exist within us all, live and breathe behind defensive walls within my subconscious, too.
As denial allows me to remain unaware of those times when negative attitudes and passive aggressive 'jokes' slip out and then back in, any person who does not buy into my angelic persona will be 'seen' as a near and present danger. As fear-based confusion turns my focus toward seeking asylum, anyone who disagrees with my narrow perspective will feel like a villain to blame for what will prove to be my hold onto subconscious pain, and thus will you watch me victimize myself, prolonging my stay in hell. And I won't see half baked traits in need of strengthening until several stiff jolts of REALITY electrify my spirit, causing me to feel so fully juiced with fury, shivering down my spine, as to awaken me to see those half baked strengths, which had been most certainly in need of shoring up. At that point in my personal development, you'll watch my many layered persona continue to crack, and as baggage escapes and reality seeps in, fate will offer me a series of reasons to work diligently to break out of Denialand, altogether, by mindfully working, step by step, toward peeling back layers of my defensive wall, surrounding my core identity, in hopes of being true to my deepest self, at last.
Riddle:
What is the subconscious mantra of those who've moved their baggage into Denialand?
You're with me or against me—friend or foe.
Riddle:
Why do so many children develop into bullies, pleasers and yes men?
We have the herding instinct to thank for that, which tends to work in this way:
If you see me as I need to be seen, you seem to be my friend.
If you knock on my wall of denial with reality in hand and rattle my fears—you feel like foe.
The greater the fear, the larger the ego, the less developed one's foundation of inner strength
A yes-man's unmet need for safety heeds the word of the herd until inner strengths develop
As long as a bullying ego leads a herd of pleasers and yes men, denial rules everyone, and
Thus is clarity, concerning reality, viewed as a threat to the herd's false sense of safety
Riddle:
Why are pleasers and yes men seen as friends?
Pleasers and yes men make us feel safe and in control.
People who need to surround themselves with admirers tend to be control freaks.
Riddle:
Why do those who surround themselves with admirees tend to be control freaks?
As soon as conflict, due to differing opinions, electrifies the air, i
Insecure folk tend to freak out! Those who freak out and lose control, too easily,
Develop a need to control others
By surrounding oneself with those who are easily controlled
The control freak freaks out less often
Riddle:
If defense mechanisms blind us to our own negatively focused attitudes and fear of
Conflict then how can we tell when we're clearly connecting with reality or not?
Good question, right?
In fact, I'll have to stop to think about that.
Oh! Wait!
Perhaps the only way to tell if our brains are fooling us is to
Stop in our tracks and reconsider which trains of thought are not as
Clear as we think, based to this fact: Our line of reasoning continues to
Run in a negatively focused circle, while insecure pleasers and yes-men,
Cheering us on, make no attempt to guide us to switch tracks toward
Solution seeking progress, which depends upon positively focused
Attitudes, leading toward change for the better ,which benefits one and all
Whereas control freaks need to win, a clear thinking realist
Works toward lasting peace, based in win-win
Perhaps more of us, who make up the herd, need to place
Snap judgments aside in favor of reconsidering that which has been
Brought to our attention more deeply than ever before
Perhaps, instead of slamming the door of our minds while
Rallying troops, made up of pleasers and yes men, who spontaneously
Snap to attention in haste to concur that 'the messenger' is
100% off his or her rocker, we need to muster the courage to
See which attitudes fly out of our mouths during moments
Fraught with conflict—positive or negative
As I had to—muster the courage to see which of my vulnerabilities kept
Tripping me up—and as I am a teacher of family communications, who feels
Eager to pass forward ways in which I learned to communicate
Honestly and openly with my deepest self—
That, my friends, is why I bare my life story, little by little, by way of
Penning a post-a-day, which is then shot into cyberspace—in hopes of
Connecting ever more meaningfully with—deep thinkers, around the
World, who, like me , surely see need of questing toward leadership
With the clarity, concerning life's harshest realities, so as to facilitate
Conflict resolution before we blow up the planet that
Sustains us, one and all
And as I believe you'd like to connect as meaningfully with
Solution seekers, as proves true of yours truly, I hope
You'll remember that thinking caps are yours for
The taking whenever you'd care to share a question, thought or
Concern with your friend,
Annie
PS
Riddle:
Would you care to know which aspect of my life I'm afraid to face and
Thus am in denial about, right now?
Ha! The correct answer to that riddle is:
I have no clue! Because our conscious minds have
No clue as to what we're denying Behring defensive walls
Oh—wait: Maybe a better riddle to end with for today is this:
Do you have a clue as to which aspect of your life you may be
Afraid to face up to, today?
With courage, humility and patience, let's continue to quest toward
Answers to classic riddles, which seem to perplex
Every generation until some deep thinking soul musters
The courage to go out on a limb and bare
His or her innermost thoughts for everyone to
If it's true that we all develop a social veneer (Ms. Cheerful, Mr. Logical, Ms. Wisest-of-all, Mr. Blue-I-don't-care-life's-a-bore) and if we mistakenly believe that the persona, which we unknowingly parade in public, is our true self then we fail to know the person, hidden behind our defensive walls, deep inside.
If we deny-deny-deny that both sides of human nature exist within oneself then we have no clue as to when we're not being true to the person, who exists at our core.
Riddle:
If we're blind to those times when we're acting out a role then what does that mean?
We lie to ourselves about who we are, what we feel and whom we've hurt.
Riddle:
If we lie to ourselves about owning inner strengths (which prove to be half baked) then who else do we lie to?
Everyone—including those we love.
Riddle:
If, during life's scary or painful times, we move our 'baggage' into 'Denialand' then what might Mother Nature feel need to say, one day?
*Mother Nature would likely say: Excuse me, my dear, but denial is not meant to be a permanent residence. Denial is meant to be a temporary state of numbness when a shot of reality proves too painful to bear. By gifting you with a defense system that casts a temporary spell of denial over your senses, I am offering you time to build an emotional bridge, upon which you'll work to develop the inner strengths necessary to ensure that your spirit Is not swallowed up by an experience, so terrifying as to cause you to feel like you've tumbled straight into Hell. This bridge is meant to keep your spirit from drowning in fear until your strong foundation of inner strengths, which your mind has the potential to develop, is fully baked, and once you've made your way, step-by-step, across this bridge, which diminishes fear by calling forth the courage necessary to peel away layers of denial in order to face life's harshest realities, head on, your newfound sense of wholeness will feel ready to welcome your true self to embrace each next stage of life with clarity as your greatest ally. And thus, my dear, if we liken Denial to a hotel, please be aware of not abusing the gift of this temporary, altered state of mind by seeking asylum within a fantasy of your own making for such a long time that you mistake the fairy tales that you unknowingly weave for the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.
Riddle:
*If your foundation has not yet been fortified by fully developed inner strengths and if denial extended over most of your life then what happens to the state of your mind?
Once permanently ensconced within 'Denialand', you'll lose control over your thought processor's conscious ability to distinguish between today's reality and yesterday's fantasy of your own making.
Riddle:
*Can you tell the difference between being victimized as kids and victimizing ourselves as adults?
Whereas kids are truly vulnerable victims of fate ... adults, whose inner strengths remain half baked, feel need to hide vulnerabilities from themselves behind a persona, which seeks admiration for strengths that in truth, have not yet ripened. And anyone who does not see this adult as being 100% fair and square and strong and right will be viewed in an ever darkening, negatively focused light, because another person's sense of clarity threatens the persona's false identity, and as soon as the persona feels threatened with being unmasked, this person's insecure ego, feeling personally attacked, will loom so large as to usurp control over both sides of that individual's brain. Once the ego controls the entire think tank, any opposing point of view will stir up yesteryear's subconscious fear, and thus does opposition, viewed as dangerous to the ego's fragile sense of safety, catalyze anxiety to strike, suggesting why tension suddenly electrifies the very sir we breathe. As a result of stirring up subconscious fears, buried alive, the insecure ego is instinctively programmed to lock the thought processor's smarts behind the defense system's wall, freeing every bit of mental energy to concentrate on fleeing, freezing in place or fighting as though to save one's life, suggesting why any well-meaning offer to help is utterly ignored, and in this way do close-minded (fearful) adults, haunted by unhealed pain, festering subconsciously ever since childhood, unknowingly victimize themselves. In short, Mother Nature gifts the child's undeveloped strengths with the asylum of denial, and then, fate repeatedly offers adults reason to quest ever more deeply into their past in hopes of liberating the portion of the mind that is in need of clarity, concerning reality, in order to function in a well balanced manner, today.
*As my stories unfold, you'll see what happens, during each stage of life, when I unknowingly move my baggage, stuffed with subconscious fears—born of unresolved, emotional injury—out of the realm of my conscious awareness into Denialand. And as long as emotional baggage remains buried within a subconscious, hazy maze, you'll watch my ego call upon a host of defense mechanisms to create a false sense of safety by encasing my negative attitudes, along with personal vulnerabilities, within denial's thickly layered, defensive wall. As this defensive wall continues to thicken, over time, I'll lose sight of negative attitudes and deep set fears, buried alive, inside my mind, thus lessening my chance of identifying which inner strengths have remained half baked until my persona's facade has been stretched so far as to begin to crack, and eventually, story by story, we'll arrive at the stage of my life when my sons are pretty near grown, and baggage, locked deep inside my true self, explodes straight through my defensive wall of denial, at which time, I'll find myself staring into my mirror, forced to come face-to-face with the fearful stranger, who, had been hidden from my conscious mind since I was three, and at that turning point in my life, my ego will no longer be able to call upon my defense system to create a fanciful Disneyland of my life, because once my wall of denial comes down, I'll not be able to deny that all of me is shaking with fear while my brain's state of utter confusion is busily, consciously engaged in questioning what the heck is going on, because I don't yet know that my power of intuition will arise and go to work, figuring out how I came to be in this unimaginable state of being while coaxing my smarts to carve a path, leading toward making my solitary way through my very own, personal hell.
In stories, describing my young adulthood, you'll watch me unconsciously deny the fact that both sides of human nature, which exist within us all, live and breathe behind defensive walls within my subconscious, too.
As denial allows me to remain unaware of those times when negative attitudes and passive aggressive 'jokes' slip out and then back in, any person who does not buy into my angelic persona will be 'seen' as a near and present danger. As fear-based confusion turns my focus toward seeking asylum, anyone who disagrees with my narrow perspective will feel like a villain to blame for what will prove to be my hold onto subconscious pain, and thus will you watch me victimize myself, prolonging my stay in hell. And I won't see half baked traits in need of strengthening until several stiff jolts of REALITY electrify my spirit, causing me to feel so fully juiced with fury, shivering down my spine, as to awaken me to see those half baked strengths, which had been most certainly in need of shoring up. At that point in my personal development, you'll watch my many layered persona continue to crack, and as baggage escapes and reality seeps in, fate will offer me a series of reasons to work diligently to break out of Denialand, altogether, by mindfully working, step by step, toward peeling back layers of my defensive wall, surrounding my core identity, in hopes of being true to my deepest self, at last.
Riddle:
What is the subconscious mantra of those who've moved their baggage into Denialand?
You're with me or against me—friend or foe.
Riddle:
Why do so many children develop into bullies, pleasers and yes men?
We have the herding instinct to thank for that, which tends to work in this way:
If you see me as I need to be seen, you seem to be my friend.
If you knock on my wall of denial with reality in hand and rattle my fears—you feel like foe.
The greater the fear, the larger the ego, the less developed one's foundation of inner strength
A yes-man's unmet need for safety heeds the word of the herd until inner strengths develop
As long as a bullying ego leads a herd of pleasers and yes men, denial rules everyone, and
Thus is clarity, concerning reality, viewed as a threat to the herd's false sense of safety
Riddle:
Why are pleasers and yes men seen as friends?
Pleasers and yes men make us feel safe and in control.
People who need to surround themselves with admirers tend to be control freaks.
Riddle:
Why do those who surround themselves with admirees tend to be control freaks?
As soon as conflict, due to differing opinions, electrifies the air, i
Insecure folk tend to freak out! Those who freak out and lose control, too easily,
Develop a need to control others
By surrounding oneself with those who are easily controlled
The control freak freaks out less often
Riddle:
If defense mechanisms blind us to our own negatively focused attitudes and fear of
Conflict then how can we tell when we're clearly connecting with reality or not?
Good question, right?
In fact, I'll have to stop to think about that.
Oh! Wait!
Perhaps the only way to tell if our brains are fooling us is to
Stop in our tracks and reconsider which trains of thought are not as
Clear as we think, based to this fact: Our line of reasoning continues to
Run in a negatively focused circle, while insecure pleasers and yes-men,
Cheering us on, make no attempt to guide us to switch tracks toward
Solution seeking progress, which depends upon positively focused
Attitudes, leading toward change for the better ,which benefits one and all
Whereas control freaks need to win, a clear thinking realist
Works toward lasting peace, based in win-win
Perhaps more of us, who make up the herd, need to place
Snap judgments aside in favor of reconsidering that which has been
Brought to our attention more deeply than ever before
Perhaps, instead of slamming the door of our minds while
Rallying troops, made up of pleasers and yes men, who spontaneously
Snap to attention in haste to concur that 'the messenger' is
100% off his or her rocker, we need to muster the courage to
See which attitudes fly out of our mouths during moments
Fraught with conflict—positive or negative
As I had to—muster the courage to see which of my vulnerabilities kept
Tripping me up—and as I am a teacher of family communications, who feels
Eager to pass forward ways in which I learned to communicate
Honestly and openly with my deepest self—
That, my friends, is why I bare my life story, little by little, by way of
Penning a post-a-day, which is then shot into cyberspace—in hopes of
Connecting ever more meaningfully with—deep thinkers, around the
World, who, like me , surely see need of questing toward leadership
With the clarity, concerning life's harshest realities, so as to facilitate
Conflict resolution before we blow up the planet that
Sustains us, one and all
And as I believe you'd like to connect as meaningfully with
Solution seekers, as proves true of yours truly, I hope
You'll remember that thinking caps are yours for
The taking whenever you'd care to share a question, thought or
Concern with your friend,
Annie
PS
Riddle:
Would you care to know which aspect of my life I'm afraid to face and
Thus am in denial about, right now?
Ha! The correct answer to that riddle is:
I have no clue! Because our conscious minds have
No clue as to what we're denying Behring defensive walls
Oh—wait: Maybe a better riddle to end with for today is this:
Do you have a clue as to which aspect of your life you may be
Afraid to face up to, today?
With courage, humility and patience, let's continue to quest toward
Answers to classic riddles, which seem to perplex
Every generation until some deep thinking soul musters
The courage to go out on a limb and bare
His or her innermost thoughts for everyone to
Consider, concerning our potential to differentiate between
That which feels instinctively natural vs.
That which we've been taught to believe ...
That which feels instinctively natural vs.
That which we've been taught to believe ...
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