This morning, I found this post
Left unpublished in drafts—
I love Halloween!
My home is always decorated weeks
Beforehand, and this year marks
No exception to that festive tradition
Each year, while Will and I enjoy
Trick-or-treating with Ravi and
Steven, (Celina and her mom
Pass out candy at home)
We are always in costume (though
Will declares himself costumed as
A man in his mid-seventies, because
The fact that the youth of the world
Sees us as elderly is hard to believe as true)
So how did one of my favorite holidays
Sneak by my conscious awareness, last week?
My mind was wholly preoccupied on
October 31st, which was the day that
The interventional radiologist
Pierced my lung with a needle, entering
Through the back of my rib cage, in hopes of
Extracting affected tissue in need of
Identification so as to inform us ASAP of
The best course of action to obliterate
The little sucker that’s invaded
The well being of my body’s good health
Once the little bugger has been named
A discussion during tumor conference will
Ensue as to choices concerning my recovery
—Surgery? Chemo? Radiation?—
Or some combination of all three ...
At any rate, in keeping with tradition
My home was festively readied for
Halloween fun several weeks back
It was on Halloween Day, itself, that
My mind was so fully dedicated to
Mustering positively focused
Courage that I lost track of
The holiday while my think tank was
Busily by-passing the reality that
One in ten patients who undergo
This procedure, which I’d faced, had
Experienced a collapsed lung during
The three hours afterward.
As one in ten seemed like a lot, I decided to
Concentrate on the fact that out of
100 people, 90 come through with both
Lungs functioning intact. As to what
I did to keep my mind occupied with
Inner strengths during those
Three hours while lying flat on
My back? No worries. I slept
Straight through all three, awakening
Just before the nurse came to my
Bedside with ‘post op’ instructions to
Take home with me. As to Will and
David—my husband occupied his mind with
A novel, and my youngest son had
His laptop. It was not until I noticed
A nurse in a cat costume that
This dawning hit—the size of
My suppressed emotional reaction to
Inner tension must have swept
All awareness of Halloween
Right out of my mind ...
During hours spent, daily, by myself
I’m either reading a light weight novel or
Writing, because it stands to reason that
When my mind is unoccupied
It drifts toward distress peeking out from
Under the comforter, within which
My intuitive intellect tucks as much of
My suppressed emotional discomfort as
Possible, and each time the truth of
My discomfort begins to seep out, that’s
When my brain calls forth creativity to
Pen a Ted Talk—whoops, I mean
A pep talk so as to insure that
My positive attitude continues to captain
The cheering squad that has begun to
Ring my doorbell, one couple at
A time, thus infusing my spirit’s
Self worth anew with
The awareness of how many
Loved ones are literally wishing me ‘well’
As to waiting for results, thank goodness
My heightened level of patience matches
My well practiced line of self control
Last night, I chose to go out to dinner with
Two couples, dear friends—because
My defense system is not the only one
Suppressing distress for weeks on end
Though on-going fatigue and need for
Solitude have placed me in a position that
Has not missed social stimulation
Will’s spirit is in need of an uplifting
Recharge, and if the truth be told—
A fine time was enjoyed by all
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