Over these past few months
Several family members and friends
Have fallen prey to serious illness
Some too ill to travel
Some too ill to live ...
That sad reality set my mind
To veering away from reeling in favor of
Doing some serious thinking in hopes of
Enervating my spirit with positivity, and while
Pondering upon the limited choices we
Must face during this fourth stage of life
I decided to do whatever it takes to
Empower my spirit to grow ever more
Proactively involved with enhancing
The natural buoyancy of loved ones’ spirits
Whose bodies are winding down as well
As buoying the heaviness of spirit that is
Commonly the sad fate of loving caregivers
(Around the globe) being that I, having served
In that capacity, had sadly been in dire need of
Uplifting spiritual support, myself
Need I state that at my age most of those who are
Mortally ill are men friends, whose physical
And/or mental decline offer their care-giving
Wives sound reason to wring their hands when
We go for coffee, and I listen to my friends and
Neighbors praying for a boost in patience while
Nursing their housebound 'patients' not back to
Health but toward the eternally peaceful resting
Place which we’re all destined to seek as, some day
The grim reaper is certain to darken the doors of
One and all ... Thank Goodness, I've been able to
Afford deeply penetrating sessions of counseling so
As to rebalance my over-reactive (rather than
Proactive) heartfelt connection to empathy, which
Being symbiotic in nature, gnawed at
My personal sense of well being until I, having
Lost sight of my spirit's need to rest peaceably while
Caring for others, felt more than half way to
Death's door, having seen no choice other than
To give all of my energy to nurturing others until
There was literally nothing left of me to give, at all—
Seriously, each time the lifelight of
My spirit got to feeling burned out, my eyelids
Felt too heavy to lift, and my appetite for life
Dwindled until my body, starving for nourishment
Shrunk down to 95 pounds, and though I’d looked
Light as a feather, an invisible weight, crushing
My spirit, failed to lift until the emergence of
Subconscious memories served to lift the curtain that
Had shrouded moments during childhood, which had
Drowned my spirit’s natural buoyancy with
Tidal waves of emotional devastation so overwhelming as
To reveal sound reason as to why PTSD had played such
A significant role in crushing my spirit as an adult, and
Thus, as Thanksgiving approached, in addition to
Appreciating family and friends, who are naturally
Nurturing, I’ll give thanks for having tapped into
My primary vulnerability to which I’d have continued to
Be blind unless I set my mind toward developing and
Calling forth personal strengths such as courage and
Humility (both of which prove necessary to expanding
The narrow focus of a person’s personal perspective) each time
I’ve intuitively followed the directives, during
Counseling sessions, led by a compassionate psychologist, who
Is skillfully versed in the healing effects of EMDR therapy
Upon clients, who have had no clue how often their
Decisions have been based in PTSD, which had remained
Undiagnosed, suggesting that they (we) had no clue of
Deep dark subconscious secrets we’d kept from ourselves
And now, having clarified the depths of my gratitude
Concerning my brain’s compliance with working through
Layers of subconscious pain, which proved inter-related so
As to heal itself in order to gain a healthy, expansive
Personal perspective concerning my role in the life of
Loved ones, you can see why, presently. my spirit is
Blessed to feel ‘wholly’ supported by a host of
Inner strengths, which having developed over these
Past several years, sees me able to minister lovingly to
Family and friends, some of whom are mortally ill, some of
Whom are spiritually at their wits end, without
Wearing my inner life force out, so in addition to
Preparing simple meals for loved ones and staying to
Break bread with those who are not so fearful of catching
A virus that might snuff out whatever little time they have
Left with immediate family, I drop off cupcakes frosted
With warm hugs, or I pick up an exhausted spouse for
A coffeehouse break and just listen, or frequently
A warm hug is tucked into a text, email or card, and thus
While offering love in small yet significant, graciously
Received doses, my spirit feels buoyed along with
Those in serious need of a lift, and as that's one side of
The coin concerning this self-strengthening change for
The better, which has recently been mine please
Stay tuned as we flip that coin, next time we meet—
Hmmm ...
No comments:
Post a Comment