DO YOU KNOW THAT YOUR SPIRIT HAS A CHARGER?

This post, penned last summer, was recovered from drafts, today:

What's a body to do when the spirit's charger plays hide and seek?

What's a body to do when expending the mental energy necessary to buoy the spirit's unexpected lethargy finds the processor wrestling anxiously with deeper truth that feels so scary as to have been defensively deleted from conscious memory during childhood?

What's a body to do when the spirit stages a sit-in until the processor, freed of yesteryear’s fear of worthlessness, calls forth a lion’s share of courage, thus empowering intuitive insight to flash through your conscious mind, revealing emotional reactions that a confounded child’s hold onto sanity had need to forget?

What's a body to do when all of the above (catching your conscious mind or mine within its grip ) proves true?  Well, if you're me, you listen to your body’s wired weariness alerting you to give your conscious think tank a rest by believing in your power of intuition’s ability to pull a simplistic plan (like the one that's currently emerging from my proactive intuition) out of a hat, and once the plan ripens to fruition then you direct the conscious portion of your adult processor to follow the bouncing ball, step by step:

Step one
Reconcile with your processor’s current inability to stabilize spiritual serenity

Step two
Direct the conscious portion of your processor to tolerate a build up of inner tension throughout your body until your brain, grown weary of struggling with the confounding nature of unresolved inner conflict, begins to coast, as though all on its own, toward a much needed rest station where your decision-maker will remain fallow until you can sense your growing belief in your intuitive powers readying the rest of your brain to take that positively focused, proverbial leap of faith toward jumpstarting the good health of your body’s main source of spiritual energy (OPTIMISM), which lights the flame that ignites intuitive insight to deliver inside information to your conscious awareness, so that, one day, you hear yourself exclaim:  OMG!  Here it comes!  That primitive memory of emotional turbulence that felt so traumatic as to have scared me half to death, believing myself such a bad child as to feel utterly unworthy of love (however, if an over-reactive adult tries to punish my self worth so severely, today, I know to sit my defense system in time out before opening my mouth so as to make sound use of my processor’s self assertive voice to call forth the emotional maturity necessary to calm down the fury of yesteryear’s authority figure, because fiery tempers and long, hard, icy stares are not as scary to the self respecting person whom I’ve grown to be, today, as had been true of yesteryear’s subservient child.

Ever since I learned that the defense system is programmed (before birth) to shut down the neocortex’s ability to think smart on the spot as soon as anxiety feels reason to spike (leaving only the survival instinct free to choose to fight, freeze in silence or flee for your life) I decided to make good use of my Line of Self-Control to tame my defensive reactions so as to strengthen my processor’s connection to logical solution seeking acuity whenever anxiety based in conflict erupts.  And ever since I’ve come to respect my hard working brain’s intuitive power of insight, the conscious portion of my brain remembers that loud voices are just loud noises, and icy looks aren’t daggers that can kill me.  Whew!

In summation of step two, the offending memory that makes us lose our cool does not need to be one that has been secreted from conscious awareness.  The offending memory can be one that has long been in need of objective reprocessing so as to stop your defense system from pumping an over-abundance of adrenaline into your bloodstream, thus decreasing your intake of oxygen, resulting in heightening your sense of anxiety as soon as any aspect of a current situation stimulates yesteryear’s mental connection to childhood fear to erupt.  In short, it’s wise to discern whether spiking anxiety is caused by a reflexive eruption of yeateryear’s unprocessed, subconscious fear rather than a near and present danger closing in, today.

Step three
Once this subconscious fear has been identified and objectively reprocessed, it’s highly likely that this change for the better will take place within you:  You may feel as surprised, as is true of me, every time your processor, releasing that offensive memory for further review, reacts like a well oiled machine, releasing a gum ball down the shute into your waiting hand as if eruptions of yesteryear’s inner tension are no longer empowered to scare your bright mind into retreating into silent submission as had been true when uprisings of anxiety, based in your  feeling guilty of human imperfection so horrific as to infuriate an over-reactive adult, who had shamed you so severely as to have shattered your fledgling sense of personal safety during your youth ... and with that intuitive train of thought clearly stated, let’s see if you too can heal yesteryear’s emotional wounds, still festering subconsciously, by choosing to believe that tolerating your anxious reactions is smart, smart, smart, because each time your brain wearies of inner conflict, mental exhaustion will alert the conscious portion of your processor to take a much needed rest, and once your processor feels relaxed, your intuition will power up, clueing you into your need to grow ever more aware of secreted guilt, trying to filter out of subconscious storage through a crack in your wall of defensive denial, which had blocked your conscious processor from switching tracks from solutions that are not feasible toward freeing up intuitive trains of thought, which, upon kicking in, offer your tuckered out conscious mind flashes of insight, which, strung together, act like a set of keys that unlock one door after another in your memory bank, suggesting that each flash of insight will spotlight a negatively focused aspect of the punitive nature of the inner conflict that has been prohibiting your flagging self worth from rising full mast, and as your undeserved sense of shame dissolves, one insight at a time, your mindful absorption of self respect continues to strengthen until you, like me, will come to place such a high value on your brain’s intuitive ability to guide the conscious portion of your mind toward solution seeking plans that prove so successful as to ready your healed sense of self esteem to voice your suppressed heart’s desire to your conscious self.

Saturday, November 4, 2017
Hmmm ... I can see that Step Three may be in need of simplifying ...

Once again, I can’t recommend Orhan’s Inheritance (a novel, penned by an author, whose fabricated characters emerged from the factual tapestry of her beloved grandmother’s personal history), highly enough.