1371 INTRO TO MY INEXPERIENCED ADVENTURES INTO PARENTING Part 6

2015

Often times when anxiety spikes, we think to know why we fear what we fear or feel guilty about choosing to attend to personal needs, which offer the existential nature of our spirits reason to thrive, when intuitive thought, which offers insight into deeper truth, suggests that our conscious minds may have no clue what our primary (subconsciously stored) stressors actually are, and that's most especially true when an experience, which feels threatening to your personal sense of safety, today, stimulates undeserved guilt, left raw and unresolved during childhood, to filter through your wall of denial, signaling your survival instinct (fight, flee or freeze) to throw your adrenal glands into overdrive until an over production of adrenalin creates a visceral reaction that shudders, tensely, throughout your body, and thus does undeserved guilt, which remains in an unprocessed state, create differing levels of PTSD, which interfere with our conscious mind's sense of clarity during crucial moments when strategic decision-making proves necessary, as had proved true of me before I was diagnosed with PTSD.  WHEW!  I wonder if the intricate length of that intuitive run-on sentence might be recorded in this year's Guinness Book Of World Records

Thankfully, upon reflection during sessions of EMDR therapy, my thirst for knowledge continues to motivate my intelligence to gain insight into identifying situations that may trigger an episode of PTSD, because that which I can recognize, I can control.

After my heart experienced ventricular dysfunction, I flew home and engaged in sessions of EMDR in hopes of improving my chances of recognizing an eruption of PTSD before my adrenal glands produce so much adrenalin as to make my heart react as if yesteryear's trauma has arisen from the dead to taunt me with a mind-daunting sense of undeserved guilt, today.

Thank goodness, we have trained professionals as well as a wealth of technical information at our finger tips, via the internet, today.  And now, let's trek back to watching the leopard on the bed, during 'the big snow' of 1967 ...