AT FIRST GLANCE ...

First things first—if it comes to pass that
This post is fraught with mistakes in grammar or
Composition then please grin and bear it (as will I upon
Review), because my power of insight-driven
Intuitive intelligence has just made me aware of
This fact:  Far too much of my valuable time
Has been spent perfecting my writing skills, so
If strings of insight begin to feel too complex to
Understand with clarity intact then rather than
Working to straighten out every complexity
I’ll respectfully ask your processor to hold
Hands with mine as, together, we do our best to
Take leaps of faith over mental complexities, which
Tend to emerge so naturally from within the depths of
My think tank that streams of consciousness, flowing
Freely throughout today’s post may confound your
Connection to clarity as well as mine stimulating
Our processors to feel confused and therefore in
Need of re-grounding so that rising sensations of
Frustration do not further debilitate our brain’s
Sense of personal dexterity concerning
Remaining on track when clarity proves necessary to
Performing a heightened degree of mental gymnastics if
We are to attain and maintain a strongly self disciplined
Quiet connection to inner peace when everyone else is
Running wild, shrieking—the sky is falling—at
Times when astute mental processes prove necessary to
Solution seeking, which ministers astutely to everyone’s
Need to calm down so as to regain control over each one’s
Run-away mind.  And if you ask—Annie, why must your
Vigilance concerning editing toward clarity be temporarily
Set aside?  Here would be my reply:  While I continue to
Consciously offer my long wearied mind plenty of rest time
My processor is busily busting its own chops editing
Lengthy strings of insight emergent within the last
Two posts published, which, upon review, prove
Far too complex (as one would expect of
Intuitive streams of consciousness) for
Mental clarity to easily maneuver its way
Through unless my think tank is employed to
Work toward creating change for the better, and
Since that task is proving to be more challenging to
My tired mind than had seemed to be the case upon
First glance, I’d mistakenly believed that little more
Would be required of my wearied think tank other than
Grammatical repairs; however, now that I know
Otherwise, this editing task set before me feels
Arduous for my easy-to-tire brain to complete without
Worrying about editing today’s post, as well!

Seriously—if my smarts can’t control
My brain from fooling my think tank into
Editing toward perfection, post after post after post—
Forever, then at this point in my life, I’ll be a goner for
Sure before my memoir est fini, so moving forward—

Today, I read a horoscope (not
Mine but of value so as to be seriously
Considered, none-the-less), validating
My comprehension of the ways in which
Each person’s degree of personal safety influences
The enhancement of his/her connectedness to
Insight-laden intuitive thoughts—or not

Why read horoscopes that are not
Mine?  Because there’s very little else to read in
The news that I can stomach without stirring up
The angry portion of my mind—so
In the interest of jump-starting each day with
A positively focused attitude, my intelligence seeks
To absorb anything that encourages
The bright side of my brain to calmly, thus
Mindfully consider trains of thought that
Do not stimulate my head to ache with unremitting
Frustration—for example, here’s a bite-sized
Sample of that which my processor swallowed quietly
And thus easily while I enjoyed
This morning’s sweetened cup of joe:
“”When fear subsides, the brain is
Quiet.  It’s out of this quiet mind that
Deep insight and intelligence emerge”

Not a horoscope, you say?  But rather
Words of wisdom welcomed by those who
Conscientiously seek to heighten
Current levels of self awareness?
Well, yes.  My point, exactly, and
Now that my brain is quiet
I can see the error of my processor’s
Original assessment concerning
How much editing is required of
The pair of posts published previous to
This one, so please know full well how
Deeply your patience will be appreciated while
My think tank continues to work quietly away at
Whittling this editing project down to size, little
By little, day by day, so as to simplify
Complex strings of insight without
Wearing down my processor’s battery before
It has fully recharged, and now, having made
Sound use of the self assertive portion of
My voice, which began to restrengthen once
Latent fears, deeply repressed during
Childhood’s most self detesting and thus
Utterly devastating moments of
Unprocessed terror (concerning my personal
Survival at the age of three) emerged from behind
My think tank’s wall of denial, last week, my
adult processor’s hard won mental strengths
No longer feel shot straight through
The head now that a conglomeration of
Deeply repressed (unprocessed) ‘memories’ of
Yesteryear’s emotional pain, based in
A three year old child’s self-flagellating
Misperceptions concerning her lack of
Self worth, which, during currently triggered
Episodes of PTSD, flash out of and then back
Behind my defensive wall of denial so swiftly as
To divest my adult processor's state of
Conscious self awareness with this caveat:
I am acutely aware of my internal need of
A quiet safe haven that proves necessary to
Identify, explore and release one self degrading
Subconscious belief (concerning my self image)
After another until my hijacked processor can
Actively engage with my next session of
EMDR therapy at which time my brain is
Retrained to switch tracks from whatever  negatively
Focused channels of self-debilitating
Trains of unprocessed thought emerged, which had
Been predisposed to knock out my intuitive connection to
Intelligence as fast as a gang of repressed fears sucker
Punched my smarts, leaving my sense of wholeness
Feeling as shattered and terrifyingly breathless due
To oxygen-deprecation, which causes my think tank to
Succumb to spiraling ever more deeply into
Yesteryear’s hellhole of self-loathing darkness where
My lost connection to personal safety languishes till
My processor hits bottom with such a self-defeating
Thud as to jar my adult think tank’s barest inkling of
Knowledge concerning my brain’s preprogrammed
Capacity to engage with EMDR to self heal yet
Another severely injured portion of
My self esteem,  little by little, and as my sessions of
Self healing therapy have grown too successful to
Deny, my oxygen-deprived think tank begins to
Remember that this newly re-emergent unprocessed fear
Will identified once the astute listening skills of
My well trained therapist guides my three year old’s
Subconsciously repressed rocky channel of thought to
Feel safely, soothingly, smoothly revealed to my adult self
Today, and upon re processing pain that had remained
Unprocessed over most of my life, another injured portion of
My self esteem repaires itself, and since healing my brain of
Yesteryear’s deeply repressed, self defeating fears concerning
My personal survival has become my primary task, hopefully
You can see why I’ve taken this time to express
The sincerity of my current decision to consciously and
Quietly balance any editing project with my processor’s
Internal need to re-energize, completely—

Thank you so much for hearing me out as
Would a friend, whose processor listens
Quietly with compassion intact rather than
As would a person, whose attitude of personal
Frustration vibrates through the air as if whipping
Around a sense of mpatient ill will rather than
Calmly choosing to will a soothing attitude to arise so
As to be of help in any way possible to hasten
A current, deeply painful episode of PTSD to
Lovingly lighten my processor’s magnetized hold onto
The dark side of my past, and as my spirit is
Once again, undergoing the process of lifting, ever
So naturally, day by day, I thank you, my friends, for
Extending your patience to me each time
My think tank is tripped so as to lose its footing
Thrusting my processor’s connection to reality to slip
Slide down that slippery slope where the sudden
Eruption of  a terrified three year old child’s
Unprocessed terror feels in dire need of
A quiet, emotionally safe space inside
My head to release repressed pain based in
Latent fear until my anxiety-ridden adult think tank
Calms enough to begin to get a grip on the fact that
I am and always have been worthy of feeling as
Deeply loved and emotionally supported as is true of
The free flow of loving support that my smart heart
Releases naturally, thus, unconditionally, wherever I go

And now, last but not by any stretch of imagination least
I hope you have been able to relax with loved ones over
This Labor Day weekend, thus resting your mind while
Rejuvenating your spirit so as to ready your smart heart to
Approach whatever may lie directly ahead with
Your sense of clarity, concerning positive attitudes
Intact whenever solution-seeking proves necessary as
This crazy world of ours continues to spin, round and round
Annie