Recent posts have zero'd in on the importance of learning to resolve conflicts with others effectively by brainstorming respectfully with family at home.
Needless to say, parents must learn to brainstorm respectfully before they can hope to role model positively focused traits, such as listening with attention to detail before replying with thoughtful self restraint.
When offering examples of conflict resolution in recent posts, I described a parent, coaching two young brothers to share their toys by teaching both to make good use of a simplistic, three step, problem-solving plan.
A second example showed these children as teens, who learned to share a car by relying upon a healthy respect for self restraint, which both had developed, during the years that leadership had coached them to adopt a simple, three-step-problem-solving plan that encouraged two young brothers to share their toys.
A third example of problem-solving with self restraint described parents and teens working through conflicting needs, caused by age-related differences.
A fourth example decribed a family of five, working through conflict, like team mates, comprised of seasoned players and rookies while purchasing a car that satisfied everyone's needs to a reasonable degree.
Each of these examples suggests that while coaching a team, leadership's underlying goal remains focused on developing an attitude of harmony, suggesting 'all for one and one for all' on the field of play. And each time leadership remembers to role model that spirit of harmony, conflict resolution ends in win-win for all concerned rather than winner take all.
*If over time, leadership works to develop an attitude of consistency in terms of role modeling those traits that we hope our children will adopt, a family has a better chance of resolving conflicts with generosity of spirit and postive focus intact.
Today, I'd like to offer an example of leadership coaching a player to work toward resolving inner conflict. Inner conflict suggests that two emotions are at war, each trying to usurp all of the space within a person's mind.
Since opposing emotions create a sense of confusion, peace of mind is replaced by floods of fearsome discontent. If asked why warring emotions feel so distressing I'd reply: Opposing emotions suggest that opposite needs are vying for dominance. (I need to do this. But I should not. Or I have every reason to feel joyful but instead, I feel guilty, angry or scared.)
Hopefully, as I describe leadership coaching the young to recognize inner conflict, you'll come to see why 'the shoulds' limit personal growth in unhealthy ways.
So okay, it's time for me to describe inner conflict causing one of my good natured sons to feel a restless sense of havoc invade his peace of mind when, in truth, he deserved to feel 100% joyful:
At first, our brand, new silver bullet was cause for celebration throughout the family. Then Barry's' mind conjured up a disturbing thought that caused his joyful reaction to tumble into a bramble bush. At this point, my son approached me to help him to understand the underlying nature of his discontent. After listening attentively, rather than dismissively, to his train of thought, I was able to discern where inner conflict caused his think tank to feel thorny. And once this rookie to the game of life had been coached to expand his sense of 'fairness', his attention to logic caused emotional disturbance to settled down, though, in truth, his sense of inner conflict may have remained unresolved. As you might agree, the unfairnesses of life are not easy to accept regardless of each individual's ever ascending level of emotional maturity :)
If you'd like to view our discussion, from beginning to wherever my unpredictable think tank decides to take us next—please tune in tomorrow :)
PS
I wonder if you can guess what train of thought caused inner conflict to invade my first born son's joyful state of inner peace in the first place? :)
Needless to say, parents must learn to brainstorm respectfully before they can hope to role model positively focused traits, such as listening with attention to detail before replying with thoughtful self restraint.
When offering examples of conflict resolution in recent posts, I described a parent, coaching two young brothers to share their toys by teaching both to make good use of a simplistic, three step, problem-solving plan.
A second example showed these children as teens, who learned to share a car by relying upon a healthy respect for self restraint, which both had developed, during the years that leadership had coached them to adopt a simple, three-step-problem-solving plan that encouraged two young brothers to share their toys.
A third example of problem-solving with self restraint described parents and teens working through conflicting needs, caused by age-related differences.
A fourth example decribed a family of five, working through conflict, like team mates, comprised of seasoned players and rookies while purchasing a car that satisfied everyone's needs to a reasonable degree.
Each of these examples suggests that while coaching a team, leadership's underlying goal remains focused on developing an attitude of harmony, suggesting 'all for one and one for all' on the field of play. And each time leadership remembers to role model that spirit of harmony, conflict resolution ends in win-win for all concerned rather than winner take all.
*If over time, leadership works to develop an attitude of consistency in terms of role modeling those traits that we hope our children will adopt, a family has a better chance of resolving conflicts with generosity of spirit and postive focus intact.
Today, I'd like to offer an example of leadership coaching a player to work toward resolving inner conflict. Inner conflict suggests that two emotions are at war, each trying to usurp all of the space within a person's mind.
Since opposing emotions create a sense of confusion, peace of mind is replaced by floods of fearsome discontent. If asked why warring emotions feel so distressing I'd reply: Opposing emotions suggest that opposite needs are vying for dominance. (I need to do this. But I should not. Or I have every reason to feel joyful but instead, I feel guilty, angry or scared.)
Hopefully, as I describe leadership coaching the young to recognize inner conflict, you'll come to see why 'the shoulds' limit personal growth in unhealthy ways.
So okay, it's time for me to describe inner conflict causing one of my good natured sons to feel a restless sense of havoc invade his peace of mind when, in truth, he deserved to feel 100% joyful:
At first, our brand, new silver bullet was cause for celebration throughout the family. Then Barry's' mind conjured up a disturbing thought that caused his joyful reaction to tumble into a bramble bush. At this point, my son approached me to help him to understand the underlying nature of his discontent. After listening attentively, rather than dismissively, to his train of thought, I was able to discern where inner conflict caused his think tank to feel thorny. And once this rookie to the game of life had been coached to expand his sense of 'fairness', his attention to logic caused emotional disturbance to settled down, though, in truth, his sense of inner conflict may have remained unresolved. As you might agree, the unfairnesses of life are not easy to accept regardless of each individual's ever ascending level of emotional maturity :)
If you'd like to view our discussion, from beginning to wherever my unpredictable think tank decides to take us next—please tune in tomorrow :)
PS
I wonder if you can guess what train of thought caused inner conflict to invade my first born son's joyful state of inner peace in the first place? :)
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