Yesterday, despite enjoying David, Ravi and dear friends, who brought dinner, I was feeling down, short of breath and physically out of sorts. It was not until evening, when everyone left that my symptoms added up to my having a reaction to last week’s infusion of chemo (the second week being the most reactive time), over the past couple of days. And as those symptoms did not flatten me, rather than feeling down, I felt suddenly relieved. Whew!
Today, I awoke feeling much relieved of most of those symptoms just in time to ready my emotional shield to steady my approach to accepting tomorrow’s infusion of a new chemo (which will be added to whatever bag of chemo that was injected, last week) with a sense of clear-headed, self control necessary to keep my mind’s eye focused upon the bigger picture of my need to do everything possible in hopes of defeating this tumor from further endangering my life until my oncologist deems my sarcoma readied to undergo surgery .
Though I’m taking precautions to remain aware of the global impact of the corona virus (which is huge as indicated by the domino effect that continues to spiral), my personal need to sustain my inner strengths to contain fearful reactions from running away with the logical portion of my mind is more than enough for my processor to maintain, day after day. So with thoughts of minimizing my fearful reactions, I consciously maintain my line of control, which reins in my imagination from spiraling each time my compromised immune system, which would surely succumb to this virus that attacks the lung, comes to mind.
And with that said, I’ll consciously switch channels, right now, from examining my fears to refortifying my think tank with peaceful thoughts by acknowledging my good fortune to be surrounded by love during this time of worldwide crises, as another couple is bringing dinner, tonight, after Will drops David—who’s heading back to the coast—at the airport, late this afternoon.
Annie 🙋🏻♀️🌈🌻🌳
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