Sunday, February 9, 2020

IF A GOOD DAY IS REFERENCED AS ‘A NO WORSE DAY’ THEN ...

Remember the book
Alexander’s very bad terrible day?  Well, unfortunately, that was yesterday for me.  So if a good day is expressed as a ‘no worse day’ then a very bad terrible day will present itself as an Alec day (so as not to associate Terrible with Alex, as I have two young Alex’s in my life).

David’s loving presence freed me to loosen up a few tears, last night, and Steven and Ravi will be here, today, and though I felt light headed when I left my bed, this morning, I’m hoping for a no worse day, ahead.

More on the upside concerning yesterday—quite a few loved ones are with me throughout each day by way of text, email, cards, bouquets of flowers, fruits and sweets (since they honor my choice not to talk about cancer on the phone day in and day out).  One dear friend stopped by with chicken soup.  Another dropped off her homemade meatloaf.  And Angie hovers close by, as always, often with caramel apples and peanuts.  So many ways are love and friendship sincerely conveyed.

Though, at times I can’t help but feel alone with this battle for life that’s ravaging my body, 24/7, I balance that feeling by acknowledging my good fortune to have so many loving family and friends at my side, who, like a sturdy life raft, make up the proactive support system that keeps my spirit afloat when the rapids are too rough to manage on my own.

Being that my emotional reactions, though consciously controlled, have always been an open book, I can’t imagine the darkness that closes in on those who feel unable to expose their vulnerabilities, naturally, most especially to loved ones who truly want to lend a hand to help to ease the fear of pain that feels insurmountable but surely must be borne at one time or another within the scope of every person’s life ...
 ❤️🌈🌻 Annie

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