653 CYCLING FROM DARK TO BRIGHT :)

You've often heard me say the mind has two sides ... dark and bright
You may remember my choice to quiet my voice when 'wait and see' seems to be the most effective response when listeners' ears are closed.

Having spent more than five minutes in the company of a brain such as mine, can you tell when the dark side of my mind grabs control over the bright side ... which thank goodness sparkles strongly and naturally, most often, because that's who I know myself to be at my core?

I wonder if you realize that the strength of my spirit guides and adjusts my decision making machine?  I wonder if that's true of you?  Or if after airing your thoughts, does your inner strength wain?  Or do your cockles rankle when others disagree?  In truth, fess up ... How would your family suggest that your think tank reacts when conflict gets your dander up at home?  Would your family state your reactiveness emotes:  You're with me or against me ... No questions asked, no buts about it ... It's my way or the highway; all attempts at discussion circle round, same old, same old, nothing is resolved, end results go no place that feel good to anyone involved?

When it comes to heightening your sense of awareness, do you realize how frequently attitude and choice feel like one and the same?

For example, let's consider fearful attitudes:  During conflict how quickly does tension cause your mind to quake so that self confidence implodes, which proves costly when decisions, concerning your spirit's welfare, are under consideration.  If you agree that it's wise to consider thoughts, which might expand upon our own then common sense suggests that disagreement need not make the boldness of one's spirit fold.

I wonder if you realize that my awareness of harboring a junk drawer inside my brain separates me from most others who have no clue that one's inability to tolerate tension, produced by inner conflict, is the culprit that ultimately wrecks our most vital relationships?  Each time my junk drawer flies open, ghosts from the past suck at my self confident strengths till I can plainly see the real cause of my spirit's collapse.  Once I came to see that my strengths collapsed each time specific individuals made their presence known to me, my attitude about our relationship adjusted ... And as attitude shifts occurred, consciously, i felt empowered to disenfranchise the presence of those individuals from sucking the strength out of my spiritual strengths.

Thank goodness my spirit's thirst for solution seeking knowledge is never quenched.  As in what came first, the chicken or the egg? ... Well let's consider this train of thought that's beginning to chug round a mindful track inside my head  ...

If like the earth revolving around the sun
My stream of conscious thought injects my spirit
With bright beams of energetic strength
Emanating from within my core permeating my brain with healthy thoughts
Pulsing lust for the best life has to offer through my blood
Then I am responsible for getting
That junk drawer inside my mind to close up shop
Why?
Because each time that junk drawer is closed up good and tight
My mind is open to absorb healthy schools of thought
And Resultant of healthy thought
Vulnerability vanishes
Allowing me to experience
The thrill of believing myself not at all invisible but honestly
Invincible ... until ...
Something pokes at a dark spot
Causing that junk drawer to fly open ...
And my self confidence slips into the murky past until
My spirit succeeds in freeing its energizing strength
Which inspires me to climb up that ladder of self esteem
Where rungs, made of insights
Spotlight solid beliefs that inject my mind
With bright thoughts, highlighting  traits
I've worked to acquire
And as hard won acquired  traits, along with insight into deeper truths
Lift my self esteem to greater heights
I manage to shut that junk drawer, again and again ...
Whew!
Being a person can feel as thorny as a rose garden ...
Which no one promised me
So I had to plant one for myself
And every now and then
I need to rid my mind of weeds in hopes of
Relaxing my mind amidst the flowers
Which grew from a dreamscape within a young adult's mind
Into the reality of the expanded life that I choose as my own, today  :) 

And as this, my friends, is what is known as
Stream of consciousness describing the human condition ...
All I can say—in addition to—oy vey—is this:
When it comes to reconditioning my mind
Your friend, Annie, will not stay stuck or slip back
Into a dark spot where insecurity looms tall, over all
For very long, ever again :)

In addition to yours truly, do you know anyone who may benefit from questioning whether a junk drawer is in need of cleaning out, from time to time?  And ... for clarity's sake, please do not assume I'm referring to you but perhaps someone you love very much whose self esteem may have gotten stuck in a drawer filled with junk, early on?  :)

My brain seems to be clearing itself of heavy duty virus, today ... hopefully, immune system is getting the jump on the bug, will pin it to the mat and win this wrestling match, at last!

Slept all day, yesterday.
Seems like conscious mind needed to conk out
In order for brain to redirect energy
Toward immune system working overtime to beat tough bug :)

As brain is signaling need for more rest ...
Nuff mind nourishing food for thought for today :)