1251. I'M SURPRISED ... BUT NOT REALLY ...

2015
Gosh!
I worked so hard not to do this
Do what?
Take a break from penning my blog
In fact, I'd no clue my mind was made up until
My stylus began to write the first word of today's post
I guess, upon writing 'Gosh'
My power of intuition had flexed its muscles, thus
Dominating the part of my brain that wants to keep writing  ...
Oops! Guess what just happened?
I stopped writing to 'think' about
How best to describe the emotional conflict, which
Compelled me to make a decision that
I've been resisting since Ravi's birth ... and
As soon as I stopped writing to think
My think tank regained control over my brain and
Kicked intuition right out the door, making me wonder if
Intuition is just the kick-starter that alerts my conscious mind to
Awaken to the fact that a change, which
Lady Luck has placed in my lap, is about to
Redirect my think tank to focus my awareness upon
The concept of 'out with the old Annie, in with the new' ...
However, even though a significant change, which remains unnamed
Is underway, please make no mistake—today's train of thought does not
Suggest that upon becoming a brand new Gramma
Your storytelling friend, Annie, has flown the coop, forever
All I'm saying is this:  I feel the need to
Take time out from seeking you out until
My focus has integrated this change, which is
Causing an old, thinking pattern to readjust
And if you ask which mind set is undergoing metamorphosis
I'd reply:  As of yet, I have no clue, because
All I know for certain, right now, is this:
Whichever mindset has been in need of undergoing
Change for the better is still subconscious in nature
And since the greater part of my conscious mind wants
To wallow in euphoria while a smaller portion wants to
Continue to write stories, ladened with insight
I guess intuition felt need to guide me toward
Taking this break until, over time
My present state of inner conflict resolves, naturally, on its own
And if you ask how I know my present state of inner conflict
Is bound to resolve, favorably, I'd reply:
This is not the first time that intuition has compelled me to
Take time out from an activity or person I love, suggesting that
Experience has taught me to take whatever time is needed to
Fully enjoy this first stage of change, which is redirecting
My powers of concentration toward welcoming
This precious sweetheart into the safe haven of my embrace, and
Since my love-struck mind feels too besotted to wrap
A greater portion of concentration around
Any train of thought other than those which express utter delight in
My spirit's high flying feeling of swelling gladness, which
Makes me believe that my heart might burst with joy if
My happiness quotient continues to soar beyond the point of no return
Common sense suggests my wallowing in this wonderous feeling rather
Than allowing resistance to extend inner conflict, longer than necessary
And though, during this first potent stage of love, it may seem as if
The wondrous gift of Ravi's presence in my life has made
Everyone and everything that I adore, somehow
Drop out of sight, here's why, organically, I know differently:
This is not the first time I've felt blessed with this blissfully besotted
Mind boggling effect of love-drunk euphoria, which, at first
Proves all consuming, suggesting my having experienced
The fact that heartfelt euphoria stimulates our spirits to feel
Super human each time we fall head-over-heels in love, for real ...
And having clarified the fact that I acknowledge
My need to wallow in this first stage of love before
Transitioning, naturally, toward each stage, which is yet to come
Here's the insight that intuition has been prodding
My sense of readiness to convey to you, today:
As much as I've resisted this mindful decision
To honor my need for time out, which
Proves hard for my heart to accept
I believe it's best to take a break from writing to you in order to
Resolve inner conflict by freeing my whole mind to
Fully absorb the gift of Ravi into my life
You know, kind of like freeing myself to honeymoon with
My grand daughter until my urge to write stories, offering
Insight-driven plans of positively focused action
Returns, naturally, on its own
And here's why you can feel assured of my return when
Readiness to rendezvous with you re-emerges from
Deep within my soul as intuitively as had been true before this
Most welcome change in my life had reason to stir conflict within
Subconscious thinking patterns, which had
Shaped my mind sets for most of my life:
Once my old mind set has had time to expand enough to absorb
This amazing creature, whose presence stirs
An all consuming, organic reaction within my entire being
A portion of my energy will free itself to
Refuel the storytelling portion of my mind, meaning that
When next you hear from me
My mind, heart and spirit will have naturally, thus comfortably
Integrated the organic presence of this delightful creature in with
Everyone and everything I value in life ...
I mean, seriously, though my love for Ravi
Ran deep, right off the bat, deeper truth suggests that
Falling in love, anew, does not displace
Everyone I'd loved and everything that had meant
The world to me before Lady Luck
Smiled in my direction, proclaiming me to be
The lucky duck, whom I've known myself to be, repeatedly
On the other hand, let's review
One insight gleaned from yesterday's paper:
Rather than dwelling on mental rituals and unfulfilled wishes
Know that good luck and hard work are one and the same ...
Suggesting that once I've taken the time to
Absorb Ravi's presence into my heart and mind, along with
Everyone and everything I love, balance will return, and
So will I ... seemingly the same, while knowing, full well
That the inherent beauty of this miraculous experience
Will have changed life, as I'd known it, for the better, yet again
And as today's train of thought pulls into the station where
My mind plans to vacation for an undetermined time 
Here's my think tank's last insight until
Intuition signals my need to reconnect and
Pick up where we're about to leave off:
It's been my experience that anything catalyzing
Change for the better, over the long run, all around, is
Worth repeating, whenever possible, for this reason:
Each time fate offers me an experience, which
Expands my awareness of love's positive impact upon
My life as a whole, some aspect of my thinking process matures ...
And thus does it seem best to free my think tank to follow this
Natural bent in the road, which
Intuition has been prodding my besotted mind to
Focus upon ever since Fate blessed my life with Ravi's presence
And if you ask what makes me so sure that
Once my sense of internal balance returns ... so will I, I'd reply:
It's been my history to trust the potent powers of intuitive thought and
Intuition suggests that I care too deeply about
Our friendship, across the miles, to bid you a final good bye ...
So, fare thee well, my friend, till readiness reawakens my
Natural inclination to resume where we left off before
My newfound love for Ravi had seemingly consumed
Heart, mind, spirit and soul :)
PS
Though I'd planned to end this post with a heartwarming photo
My iPad has stubbornly refused to comply, so as soon as
I find time to go to my computer, I'll complete today's post, which
Reminds us of this fact of life:
Change is the only constant in life, and inevitably
Conflict, which accompanies change, is sure to complicate
The status quo that came before, and if—in my  eagerness to
Wholly embrace this wondrous aura of wide-eyed innocence—I 
Feel compelled to take a time out from life as
I knew it before change came knocking at our door
It makes sense to acknowledge this fact, as well:
Inner conflict must be resolved before change for the better
Holds hands with peace of mind, at last—until such time as
Another unexpected change catalyzes inner conflict to arise, yet again ...
And if you ask why change and conflict are necessary to personal growth
I'd reply:
Either we grow all the wiser by consciously seeking to
Expand our sense of depth awareness by diving ever more deeply into
Unexplored fathoms of self discovery as
We mature throughout each stage of life
 or
We shrink back from adventuring forth upon the path, which offers us
Untold opportunities to re-evaluate old mind sets that limit our
Innate ability to uncover strengths, which remain untapped, unless
We grow conscious of our need to choose to embrace
A series of leaps of faith, which implies the necessity to
Muster the courage to leave old comfort zones behind at
Every stage of life in favor of advancing toward
Personal growth in every arena of love and life...
PSS
As several hours have passed since this post was published
Here I am, as promised, inserting the adorable photo that
Steven emailed, this morning, and
When your eyes drink in Ravi's sweet, wide-eyed innocence
I believe you'll understand why her presence in my life
Melts my heart with so much gladness that I can actually feel
My spirit glowing with the incandescent warmth, inherent in pure delight, and
Feeling utterly re-energized from the inside out, I find myself accomplishing
Everyday tasks with gusto because, upon arising, each morning
Ravi's brand new gramma feels younger than Springtime, 24/7, and
Though it's hard to argue with an expanded sense of awareness as wondrous as that
I hope my compelling need for time out—while my mind adjusts to
Absorbing the gift of Ravi in with every aspect of my life—proves
Smooth and swift for this reason:
Though it's my choice to separate, I'll miss my connection with you more than words can say :)

Ravi's shayna punim

2 months old

2 adorable for words

Lucky me :)

1250 INSIGHTS TO CONSIDER WHEN TALENTS TO FINDING A SOLUTION REMAIN UNTAPPED ...

2015
Still not in the mood to complete part three of my toy catalogue plan
So, rather than forcing the issue, I'll make use of insights gleaned from
This morning's paper, which support the importance of identifying
Those times when subconscious fear, lurking behind
Defensive walls, blocks our intuitive powers from identifying
Deeper truth, concerning heartfelt emotional reactions, which
Remain alive but anesthetized behind locked doors within our minds
So okay, here goes:

You can't live your dream and your fear at the same time
Furthermore, by letting go of your dream, you let fear win

Just as physical wounds heal from the inside out
The same proves true of emotional wounds, so
Come to terms with the initial event that caused your original pain

When in a negative frame of mind
You assume you have knowledge enough about your strengths
When, in truth, you have talents untapped

Rather than dwelling on unfulfilled wishes and mental rituals
Know that good luck and hard work are one and the same

Work that some would find stressful
Proves energizing for you, because
You believe in your ability to find a solution

A change in February will invigorate you and
Spark your social life

Be gracious and discreet, and you'll have
No regrets connected to certain moments of privilege

Though I know not whether today's insights were written by man or woman
The concept of consciously taking an active role in creating change for the better
Invigorates the spirits of one and all, at every age ...

1249 A WHIMSICAL TWIST :)

2015

Today's post is short and sweet for this reason:

I added such a whimsical twist to yesterday's train of thought that

In case you have time to read only one post, today, I hope you'll

Choose to scroll back and give my most recent addition to

That stream of consciousness, a fast twirl around the dance floor

And with that said

Have you taken note of the fact that I didn't think to

Mention a certain, little sweetheart's name or include her photo
In these last two posts, running?

See why I think we're on a roll toward balancing
Ravi's presence in my life with resuming my storyline!
Oops!  Oh my gosh!  Look how my love for
This sweet little creature, whose fleeting smile melts my heart
Snuck out of my mind and onto our screens as naturally as
My need to hold her close manages to slip into the forefront of
My conscious thoughts, time and again, suggesting that
Logic is not empowered to squelch emotion, swelling, intuitively
Within the depths of my heart and
With thoughts of embracing the fact that
Humans are emotional creatures by nature
I'll refer you back to yesterday's post in hopes that
You'll enjoy a brief visit with Socrates, who
Swooped down to whisper a slice of wisdom
Into my ear while I was reviewing
That which had been penned previous to today :)

1248 MY SPIRIT'S NEED TO RESUME DEPTH OF THOUGHT WHISPERS IN MY EAR

2015
Today I awoke with this train of thought running through my head:
Sometimes I could swear that my memory has a mind of its own
I say that because of the times when my think tank knocks on
My memory's door but the only one who's aroused proves to be
The stubborn, muscle-bound bouncer, who won't let me in and
As this guy resists any show of force on my part
All I get in return for talking to solid walls
Is a rebellious reaction, suggesting that no one's home
I mean, over my lifetime, I've gone to great lengths to
Create and catalogue a well organized library of
Past events, each of which can be found listed under
One of four columns:
A-Pleasurable, so repeat as often as possible
B-Necessary to my well being, so repeat as needed
C-Confusing, for countless reasons, so analyze and change for the better
D-Anxiety producing—and as anxiety and I don't mix
I'd call upon my defense system to wall up the worst of these
Fearsome experiences, which
Scared my think tank silly, behind a solid, sound proof door, and
Each time my defensive guard has successfully bolted excessive fear
Behind this door, my conscious mind falls under a spell, which
Makes me forget that memories, caged within my subconscious
Are empowered to haunt my well being from within
And though my ability to name those sleeping dogs proves unlikely
My defensive guard, looking to ensure
My conscious mind's sense of personal safety
Makes good use of one last nail to hammer
This message onto the front of that sound proof, solidly locked door :
WARNING:  DANGER ... ENTER AT RISK OF MEETING YOUR REAL SELF
Finally, after drawing a black curtain across that bolted door, behind which
Subconscious memories lurk in a raw and still painful state
I threw away the key to creating change for the better, and
Went about my life with no doubt that
Knowing myself as I do, I'm true to myself, through and through, and
As long as my greatest fears remain beyond your view and mine
I can maintain the false belief that no one knows how to take good care of
My mental, physical and spiritual needs better than me, and
As long as that false belief system directs my life
I can bamboozle my sense of clarity into believing that
I care less about certain experiences or certain people, when
Reality suggests that if I didn't care as deeply as I do
My defense sytem would not have been called upon to
Bury the painful truth, concerning the depth of my emotions, behind
Solid walls, deep within the subconscious portion of my mind, suggesting that
Imaginative rationalizations and logical thought processes are not one and the same

As the conscious portion of the human condition falls under columns A B or C
(Pleasurable or necessary to my well being or confusing and in need of clarification)
You can see why I'd thought this plan, cataloging  emotional reaction
Would simplify my ability to decide which experience to experiment with
And which to sidestep as the future unfolds
I mean, the simplicity of any plan, which
At first glance appears to be based in logic, seems to make so much sense that
The path of my future seemed pretty safe and straightforward, right?
Hmmm ... On second thought ...
How often does straightforward and safe lead toward
Ordinary, even boring, down the road?
Seriously, when the name of my chosen path is:
Love and Life, Lived To The Fullest
Reality suggests I keep this fact in the forefront of my conscious mind:
Emotion and logic are opposites, and opposites are
Meant to attract in order that we learn from each other's personal strengths, so
Whenever I con myself into believing that
Logic wins over emotion, like scissors wins over paper, then
Deeper truth suggests that I may have rocks in my head
And here's why this insight into our need to balance
Emotion with logic proves true, time and again:
Each time my defense system (which is based in
Emotional reactiveness) fools my think tank into believing
That no one knows me as well as I do, I need to consult with
A friend, who proving true blue, will
Look me in the eye and ask:  Will you please
Stop dancing around the truth long enough to
Muster the courage, patience and humility necessary to
Embark upon a quest toward self discovery in hopes of
Retrieving that key to unlocking the door in
Your memory bank, behind which
Your greatest fear has been torturing
Your peace of mind with spikes of unidentified anxiety, ever since
You were a wide-eyed child, who'd misguidedly believed
Your parents were godlike, and thus, whatever
Their reactions 'taught' you to believe ... about yourself ...
Must be true ... and though parental reactiveness may prove
Personally strengthening to one sibling, while proving
Detrimental to another, here's why parental belief—
Whether positive or negative in nature
Can prove devastating to budding self esteem, all around:
While cutting our teeth, we grow up, looking outward
Seeking the admiration of others, and when
Admiration is not forthcoming, a child tends to believe
That he or she is doing something irreparably wrong when
Deeper truth suggests that embracing an intuitive
Experiemental approach to life and love is as right as rain, which
As we know, must fall in every life while our child-like spirits continue to
Reach intuitively, courageously and determinedly toward
Testing parental limits, which proves scary but necessary if
We are ever to unlock that door, behind which
Subconscious fear is stored, and not until we choose to
Set out on a conscious quest to retrieve the key that offers us
Untold opportunities to search within more deeply than ever before
Do we come to know the sum of our parts, which makes us whole
And here's why that's all I'll write for today:
The spirit of Socrates just slid down a sun beam from on high in the sky
He came to encourage me to nourish my spirit by continuing to
Identify subconscious fears that inhibit me from
'Doin what feels natural' to me
And after the sage listened to my learned response that
That kind of selfish behavior breeds chaos
My friend chuckled and replied:
Annie, a certain amount of anxiety-producing chaos
Proves necessary to re-organizing
A false belief system that limits your choices
I think you've forgotten that before offering you clearance to
Live your dream, I filled your think tank with
The wisdom inherent in The Line Of Control, and
Now, it's my hope that you'll continue to pass forward
My message—concerning balance in all things—in today's post
Then, with a flutter of wings, my friend rose off my shoulder, and
Right before taking flight, the sage tossed me a smile and
A gold star, which he'd plucked from the sky, and
The last words I heard before
Eternal Wisdom flew out of sight but not out of mind were these:
'Keep up the good work, Annie; once you remember that
Perfection is not the goal, your power of intuition will
Overcome subconscious fear of failing those you love, and as
Peace of mind, duly earned, shall be your just reward,  you'll be just fine
But wait!  I implored ...
I didn't know 'balance in all things' was your thing , and
I'd thought my line of control was godsent, and
What of your message:  Know thyself?
At this, my wise friend, who personifies
The universal spirit of eternal wisdom, actually
Chortled aloud and though he'd flown out of sight into
A cloud, I found that he'd chosen to hover just close enough for
Me to catch on to yet one more insight before he
Rocketed away to impart wisdom around the globe, and
Thus, by listening attentively, did I hear my friend, who
Embodies deeper truth passed forward through the ages—reply:
Do you think a guy like me would have risen to sagehood
Had I only two words of wisdom to impart throughout my entire lifetime?
Get real!
At that, we laughed at the truth, and I relaxed with the knowledge that
Men may use fewer words than women, but that does not equate with
Their harboring fewer thoughts, deep inside, concerning
Heartfelt emotion, which finds it tough to
Hide out of sight, forever and a day ...
And if you ask how I know that to be true, I'd reply:
First of all, the faith that I place in my powers of intuition is hard to shake, and
Secondly, I raised three sons, whom, upon embracing manhood
Continue to demonstrate the depth of their heartfelt emotional reactions as
Openly, avidly and passionately as did my dad ... sooo
If you suggest that men are logical and women are emotional
I'd respectfully suggest that you might want to think on
That misconceived belief—again :)

Had you known me as a child in pigtails
You'd have seen an avid reader, whose curiosity, concerning
People and places, was as easily aroused as was true of
My high spirited sense of fun while I'd skipped merrily through
My early years, thoroughly enjoying my role as
Sidekick to my adventurous dad—
On the other hand, photos, taken during my childhood
Show both arms bandaged, because anxiety, which
Remained unnamed, caused me to itch to uncover
A fear, which remained embedded under my skin until
Recently, when I discovered the fact that I'd lugged around
A ton of undeserved guilt, concerning this mistaken belief, which
Had burrowed deep within a pocket of my subconscious memory in
The aftermath of my baby sister's death:
I 'know' myself as not being good enough to feel worthy of my parents' love ...
Oy Gevalt!  Talk about a belief in need of re-evaluation!

Over these past twenty years
It's been my good fortune to
Fly or sail to many fascinating countries throughout
This great big wonderful world of ours; however
No adventure, whether read or taken purely by choice
Has offered my mind reason to explore more deeply into
The meaning of love and life than
Every spiritual excursion that I've chosen to take since
Diving into the depths of self discovery, and
As each courageous dive serves to
Relax yesteryear's fears more thoroughly than before
Today's travails tend to lighten up as quickly and naturally as
My think tank has grown practiced at redirecting
Negatively focused trains of thought toward
A positively focused track, thus
Brightening the path of my future for this reason:
Each time I consciously reset the course of my attitude by
Setting my defense system aside
My think tank feels free to come up with a plan, based in clarity, which
Aligns reality, concerning safety, with satisfying
My unmet needs in ways that prove better balanced, today, than ever before :)
And Amen to a serious, yet whimsical, stream of consciousness that
Truly frees me to be true to the sum of my whole self, at last!

In addition to pigtails and bandages, see truly happy smile with book in lap :)

Imagine my daddy standing before me, snapping this photo of his sidekick at the fair
No need to mention bandages, which are plain to see

As to my pigtails,
Look closely and you'll see braids pinned up, peeking out from under
The jaunty curve of my hat, suggestive of this fact:
The little we see on the surface of life is not all there is know—

Hopefully, you've noticed that little by little

My memory is feeling less rebellious

More encouraged to resume storytelling on its own—
Gotta love it when a plan (born of intuitive thought)
Comes together, step by step, over time, especially
When that plan relieves anxiety, saves your sanity and
Meets heartelt needs, which feed your spirit and mine, suggesting, yet again, that
Each time we wholly embrace 'balance in all things', all's well that ends well! :)

1247. GLAD TO REPORT A SERIOUS THOUGHT!

2015
At last!
I awoke with a serious train of thought cycling through my mind, and
If you ask me to express that thought, here's what I'd reply:
I've gained insight into the fact that, over my lifetime
My subconscious has harbored an
Unidentified feeling of wrong doing, left over from early childhood, which
Has caused my spirit to bow in subservience to certain people, whose
Presence has had the power to manipulate many of my decisions, which
I'd mistakenly believed to have been my very own
If you ask me to name these people, I'll reference discretion and
Respectfully decline for this reason:
I believe that naming those who'd employed mind manipulation to
Bully me into submitting to their will may worsen relationships, which
Still mean the world to me, and as gaining insight into
Improving relationships is what I'm about

My new found sense of clarity has made me aware of how often
A person's sense of security may depend upon agreement, suggesting that
When voicing a difference of opinion, red flags of defensiveness may erupt, and
Once attitudes are colored by defensive reactivity, which

Electrify the emotional environment with negativity, provoked by anxiety
The discussion at hand tends to focus away from harmonic resolution toward
Striking out with disparaging comments, which

Put dissenting opinions down ... And recently, I've come to see
How disparagement can prove so subtle as to have

Addled my brain just enough to silence my voice. ... And
If you ask why I'd retreat into myself when feeling put down
I'll remind you of this fact:
Ever since tragedy hit our home when I was three
I'd harbored a subconscious need to be as good as good can be by
Mothering everyone I'd loved ... Sooo
It makes sense that if I'd said or done anything to
Invoke another person's displeasure, a sudden bout of anxiety

Would make my vulnerability fair game for

Brow-beating bullying, which proved so slyly insinuating that

That which had been said might seem harmless to casual observers, but
Each time I'd felt blindsided by remarks that desparaged my character
My powers of intuition 'knew' that something was 'off'; however
Pinpointing whatever that something was escaped my conscious awareness until
I came to see why certain relationships, which had been harmonic in nature
Proved weighted in favor of serving the other person's needs
And if you asked me to pinpoint why I was so easily intimated and

Manipulated so as to serve the needs of others in favor of my own, I'd reply:
As long as I'd unknowingly bullied myself with subconscious guilt
In the aftermath of my baby sister's unexpected death
I'd be an easy target for this reason:
As long as feelings of undeserved guilt remained buried deep inside
I'd unknowingly put myself down, suggesting that
A portion of my mind agreed with the opinion of he or she, who proved to be
A putdown artist, extraordinaire—and the fact that part of me felt guilty while
Intuition suggested my being innocent of wrong doing, created
Inner conflict, which caused anxiety to disturb my peace of mind
Thank goodness, during recent years, strings of insight

Like those I've penned, today, sparked a series of epiphanies, which
Shone spotlights on mysterious mind games that controlled
My decision-making process more often than I was aware
Over time, it came clear that my anxious reaction in the aftermath of
Disagreeing with a loved one's opinion, was actually caused by
That person's displeasure with my ability to
Cut through the bull shavings in order to identify deeper truths, which
Denial denies each time the truth hurts too much to confront, and
Over time, our defense systems bury as many facts as necessary to anesthetize pain—

In truth, the frightened three year old child, lurking within, would stir up
Sudden stabs of anxiety due to my feeling guilty of
Wrong doing, deep inside, and if you ask why
Subconscious anxiety sliced my unmet needs into mincemeat, I'd reply:
I believed myself so inconsequential as to be easily abandoned by those I loved
And thus, unbeknownst to my conscious mind, my greatest subconscious need
Had been to repair whatever ailed my family, and in this way did I hope to
Ensure the element of harmonic stability amongst one and all ... and as long as
My need to fix everyone and everything remained subconscious in nature
I'd no conscious clue as to how often my primary need to
Ensure peace within the family caused me to
Dismiss heartfelt needs, which had been my own ...

Upon time spent in reflection, I came to see that I'd felt guilty of being selfish, when
Deeper truth proved the opposite true ...
And so, today, having gained insight into where my sense of clarity had been off
I no longer unknowingly put myself down or cowtow to subconscious guilt, which
Though undeserved, had managed to bully many of my decisions until
Strings of insight made me aware of how often my adult emotional reactions, had been
Directed by the frightened child within, who'd
Thought to have 'failed' my loved ones, early on
As my quest into self discovery opened my eyes to see how often
This guilt-ridden child had redirected my decisions, I now feel grateful for this fact:
Presently, the intuitive, self respecting adult, whom I've grown to be
Makes good use of her voice by standing up to those who had once
Intimated me, and now that today's string of insights feels like a wrap
Here's what my stream of consciousness has been leading me to convey:
When you are amidst family or friends, may I respectfully suggest that
You take a moment to direct your sight at each loved one, separately, to see if
Your mind, working as a whole, can pinpoint a person (or people) in the group
Whose presence is still empowered to rouse your anxiety or
Silence your voice due to subconscious guilt that
You've carried forth, undeservedly, and unknowingly, to this very day ...
If you ask why I'm suggesting that you conduct this experiment, I'd reply:
This simple plan may inspire you to discover the power that
A loved one's will has wielded over
Your spirit's sense of free choice, throughout your life
And as insight into where you've abdicated your power to another dawns on you
Your choices, which prove existential, and thus highly personal
May begin to expand, as naturally as has proven true of mine
On the other hand, that kind of change for the better can only come true once
You come to recognize those times when spikes  of anxiety are caused by
Undeserved guilt, awakening a darkened view of yourself that proves untrue of
The person, whom you've matured into, today, and thus
Whenever you have reason to reconsider
The truth of your personal, heartfelt unmet needs, today
Perhaps you'll choose to empower yourself, as have I, in this courageous way:
Presently,  I listen, patiently, openly and with an attitude of humility to
Everything everyone has need to say, and then when all the listening is done
I empower only three people to brainstorm while finalizing decisions concerning
Meeting needs, which prove to be mine, and as I have no qualms about
Pinpointing that trilogy of deeply thoughtful individuals, publicly, here they are:
ME, MYSELF and I!
Oh!  Much to my delight, Steven just called, hoping that
I'd jump at the chance of taking  care of Ravi for a couple of hours
And as it's hard to write and jump for joy, simultaneously
I'd like to end today's post with one last morsel of food for thought:
At times, while considering words of wisdom passed from one generation to the next
We find ourselves in awe of that which floats out of the mouths of babes—
At other times we say a picture is worth a thousand words, suggesting
That all we need do to convey what's on our minds is strike a pose—

You're not the boss of me!

And that's the truth!

Recently, Celina and Steven wore tee shirts, which match Ravi's, to our house

Except that their tee shirts say:

I'M SO TIRED!

 I just couldn't resist this funny trio of shirts

And when our kids opened the box 

We all enjoyed a good laugh—because
We laugh at the truth—and
We who learn to laugh at ourselves laugh best! :)

1246 THREE COMMENTS—THANK YOU! :)

2015
Received three comments in response to yesterday's post:

A—Hunger due to growth spurt
Remedy:  Increase ounces
Done!

B—Overstimulation in need of calming
Remedy:  Swaddling
Aha!  Forgot to try that!

C—Painful bubbles of gas
Remedy:  Offer TLC and pat Ravi every which way except upside down!
Done!

So, we remembered to try two out of three

And as each suggestion makes sense, next time
We'll add B to A and C if need arises, anew

Silver lining—Once Ravi wore herself out
She and her sleep deprived parents enjoyed a restful night
Suggesting all's well that ends well

As to Gramma—
With so much heartfelt stimulation over these past seven weeks
As soon as I push publish, I'm off to swaddle, myself! :) :) :)

1245. IN NEED OF YOUR ADVICE ...

2015
Well, last night offered up an unexpected turn of events
Ravi arrived sweetly content, and as always, our hearts melted with love
She was due for a feeding, so Steven prepared her bottle while
Our cousins oo'd and ahh'd over our adorable, two month old granddaughter
And all was well until the bottle was empty at which time
Ravi burped and rather than smiling, she began to cry, which
Is quite unlike her when her tummy is full and her diaper dry
Since her cries grew more strained throughout the evening
And since Steven is a new dad and since
Celina was home, catching up on much needed rest
And since I've not soothed a distraught two month old child for
Close to four decades, let me fill you in on every attempt to
Remedy Ravi's distress in hopes of easing her discomfort, which
Produced persistant wails, throughout the evening:
First we resorted to back patting to induce another bubble to burp
When that was not forthcoming (and having learned that
Ravi does not like being wet), we checked her diaper, again
When she adamantly refused her pacifier, time after time
We took turns placing her on her tummy, over our knees and
More back patting ensued in hopes of coaxing bubbles to release
When that didn't do the trick, we'd turn her on her back and
Ministered gentle leg pumps in hopes of
Releasing bubbles from her tummy in any way possible
This was followed by taking turns walking her, to no avail
After about half an hour, having done everything we could think of
Except turning her upside down, we wondered about a growth spurt and
In hopes of assuaging her wails, we offered our distraught little one
Another ounce or two of formula, which she inhaled as eagerly as if
No one had thought to feed her for hours, and
Then, as if someone had pushed rewind, the entire scenario repeated, repeatedly
All told, Ravi was beside herself throughout the evening, and
While we wondered aloud about gas pains or constipation
 Not one of the six adults (two of whom proved to be
A doctor and nurse), was able to pinpoint or mollify her distress
(BTW, in addition to being a nurse, my cousin is
A mother of four and grandma, eight times over) ...
We reassured Steven, who had never seen his
Sweet, little munchkin exhibit distress, for hours, for reasons unknown, that
Nary a babe is born, who does nothing but eat, pee, poop, smile and sleep
That just as with life and love, in general, parenting draws mystery into our lives
Much to Steven's credit, he kept calm as the hours passed, while
Offering his child plenty of TLC
Thank goodness, Ravi quieted right before she was placed
In her car seat when Steven deemed it time to
Drive the short distance separating their home from ours
As to Ravi's night, I have no clue, as of yet, if
Whatever had ailed this sweet, little person settled down on its own ...
Right now, it's 6AM, and I'll not chance awakening parents, who
May have experienced a challenging, wakeful night with their child
So—having offered you this detailed account of last evening and
Knowing full well that it's been our good fortunate, over
These past two months, to care for a winsome infant, who
Had not experienced hours of relentless distress
Here is my question in hopes of planning ahead, should
Ravi's discomfort prove unrelieved, again:
Is there anything you would have tried that we'd missed?

PS—Heard from Steven at 10AM ...

Glad to relate that having tired herself out, Ravi slept through the night, suggesting

You can't believe everything you see written on a tee shirt :)

BTW, are you aware of what just happened as naturally as I'd surmised?
Life took an unexpected turn, and
My besotted frame of mind had need of no urging to
Open its door to release and make use of
Brain-storming, solution seeking skills, again ...
And as, by now, it's second nature for me to request help when
My think tank proves stymied ...
The problem-solving portion of my mind opened, naturally, in hopes of
Absorbing any tidbits of experiencial advice that you may suggest in hopes of
Creating change for the better, as the future unfolds, for us, all
Your friend,
Annie