As to my best friend at my old school, she and I will have enjoyed sleep overs for a short time. However, now that I feel utterly enchanted (for the first time in my prepubescent life) every time my socially self-confident peepers lock into that pair of twinkling blue eyes, shooting sparks of mischief in my direction, my friends (inclusive of the boyfriend, whom I’d singled out as my own), previous to moving from the city to the suburbs, were last week’s toast.
Alas, a child’s egocentric unrealistic expectations are not to come to fruition. You see, while my mind is spinning day dreams, the fickle finger of fate is writing every kid’s worst nightmare onto the next several pages of my life.
Soon, you'll watch a shocking awakening take place, which I'd never expected to slap me so sharply across the face as to shatter my socially self confident voice. Then, as seeing is believing, I'll show you why my highly naive pipe dream concerning taking center stage at my new school is bound to go up in smoke.
As this mysterious slap in the face (causing my spirit to secretly shoulder a boulder of deeply confounded misery) unfolds, you'll watch me unknowingly victimize myself—repeatedly—in story after story—until an astute therapist guides my adult mind toward discovering the exact moment in time when a jumble of mixed messages had begun to mess with my self esteem’s sense of clarity, causing me to de-value myself—big time!
Annie
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