RELIEF AND HAPPINESS ARE NOT BECESSARILY THE SAME

Every time I send a group email update, my recipients are so happy with my progress toward healing that they assume we share the same feeling when reality concerning our emotional reactions suggests that’s not yet true.  While my family and friends are both relieved AND happy about my progress, pain places my current level of happiness upon a middling rung until my heightened level of physical discomfort has had time to significantly decrease.  And so, rather than feeling frustrated with friends and family who believe I feel as they do, I am happy to offer them reason to feel rejoiceful during this crazy time of trump and Covid, both of which—combined with physical pain—tame my release of happiness though my level of relief at being declared cancer free is high.