Friday, February 2, 2018

DEFINING A SOULFUL SENSE OF INNER PEACE THAT MAKES SOUND USE OF COMMON SENSE

Lately, I’ve begun to draw a line of demarcation, differentiating inner peace from peace of mind.

Why?  Because of how much time I’ve spent wondering how best to regain and maintain my thought processor’s natural connection to clarity by calming my composure as quickly as possible at those times when deeply repressed hot spots of anger or fear, having been poked at, cause a wounded portion of my ego to feel so newly provoked as to stimulate my survival instinct to flare up, burning my processor’s natural connection to clarity to a crisp, resulting in my feeling too hot to respond to the situation that’s currently taking place with my intellect’s connection to clear thinking feeling solidly grounded in inner strength, based in my re-balanced sense of self worth.  Whew!

Whenever I choose to make sound use of my self assertive voice, I hope to remain so well connected to my intellect’s sense of intuitive clarity as to listen so calmly and astutely to the concerns of another as to cool down a conversation seething with unresolved hot spots on both sides each time it’s my turn to open my mouth and with respect for us both, effectively speak my mind.  I mean why take the time to improve listening and speaking skills if not to make good use of one’s processor to calm an out of control reaction on the part of those whose opposing viewpoint is visibly too hot under the collar to absorb my positively focused, solution-seeking attitude?

In addition to that insight, I want to be able to know when my emotional reaction is being exacerbated by the unexpected eruption of my own subconscious anger or fear or both, and this is important to me for this reason:  Whenever my inner peace feels under duress, my intellect’s connection to solution-seeking clarity remains much more deeply befuddled than my conscious awareness is able to acknowledge.  And having come to absorb that insight more completely, I can feel another growth spurt brewing deep with me.

When my first thought is befuddled, because subconscious fear or anger feels newly ruffled, my processor mixes up a troubling event from the past with whatever I’m experiencing or discussing, today.  And whenever that happens, my decision-maker can’t think straight ahead to save my dizzied processor from making serious mistakes in judgment.

Presently,  my intuitive powers have been coaching my conscious awareness to define peace of mind as relating to those times when my personal and professional lives are both going along on a daily basis, as planned.

On the other hand, inner peace suggests that whenever a current situation goes haywire, offering my conscious connection to peace of mind sound reason to worry, my innermost sense of peace remains soulfully unruffled so as to maintain my processor’s natural connection to intuitive intelligence, which steadies my smarts to remain cool, well-balanced and collected so that a latent eruption of yesteryear’s unresolved angst does not stop my brain from functioning like a well oiled machine, most especially at those times when my smarts have need to determine my proper place in terms of whatever is currently happening on center stage so that I can clearly discern when it’s best to jump into the fray and assume a leadership role, or when to humbly take instruction by listening attentively to a more knowledgeable old soul, or when to stand quietly on the sidelines, deciding which will better serve to hasten the formation of a positively focused, solution-seeking plan:   Shall I speak and lead or listen and follow or assume the observant role of nonpartisan neutrality, choosing to cheerlead no team over another if the drama at hand concerns a conflict based in pots and kettles calling each other black ...

We who see ourselves as Supermen and Wonder Women act as if we are able to leap off of high buildings in a single bound in hopes of flying others to a place of personal safety when deeper truth, concerning reality checks, suggests that behind our egocentric personas, we, who see ourselves as fixers, are actually vulnerable human beings, who have a tendency to move as fast as a speeding bullet, believing our think thanks to be as powerful as a locomotive that crashes into rather than through walls of denial, which prove to be every bit as blindly, defensively impenetrable  as is true of our own, In short, I’ve come to liken Fixers (who misperceive of their processors as being akin to super hero status) to The Wizard Of Oz ...

Upon retiring The Fixer in me, my thought processor (which mistook talking and listening skills for super powers, most especially during the heat of conflict) had reason to reconsider the folly of my mistaken self perceptions, which have changed for the better in this regard:  I’ve had need to work conscientiously at uncluttering the subconscious portion of my mind by spotlighting hot spots of unresolved anger and fear, which remained so deeply repressed that my think could not differentiate between uprisings of latent unresolved anxiety and today’s fresh anxiety (based in a worry that’s solely connected to whatever is jangling my conscious peace of mind, right now.  I also had to stop my processor from believing it had developed super human X-ray vision to see through walls of denial that we’re not my own.  I mean, if it’s very difficult to gain insight that spotlights missing keys to unlock the secrets that my subconscious hides from my conscious awareness, what in tarnation is to be gained from knocking my head against walls of denial to which my family, friends and colleagues are blind?  In short, I had to grow aware of the fact that it’s an admirable feat to continue to muster the courage and humility to penetrate my persona in hopes of coming to know my real self in depth.

As one insight-driven, intuitive change for the better leads the conscious portion of my think tank to spotlight another, I hope that my processor’s most recent growth spurt will become ever more able to clearly differentiate between subconscious hot spots that trigger yesteryear’s unresolved angst to spike, repeatedly vs current situations that provoke my sense of worry, based solely in what’s gone wrong, today, because that change for the better will prove so profound as to strengthen my ability to make sound use of my self assertive voice to say ‘yea or nay’ while simultaneously maintaining my newly rebalanced state of internal emotional composure, which has grown highly sensitive to acknowledging those times when my well practiced intuitive powers are tuning into the fact that my generous nature is being bullied, passive aggressively, to ignore my basic needs so as to place the needs of another way above my own.  Been there ... done with reacting like an indentured servant whose subconscious attitude of unworthiness was so self demeaning as to have cast my human vulnerabilities out into the cold cruel world unless I chose to jump up to serve with a smile before a task master started to  whip my think tank into submission by letting loose with a judgment call in such a covert manner of speaking as to have verged on insulting my most admirable character traits until my existential spirit, feeling utterly whipped back into subservience, complied, good naturedlg with every ‘request’ that was actually a demand ... or else.

As a positive consequence of having worked determinedly to unclutter my mind of latent strikes of anxiety that defy common sense, I rarely fear open confrontations with those whose defense systems blind them from identifying their own passive aggressive tendencies, based in egocentricity.  And Amen to a change in attitude that proves so peacefully positively focused as to be deeply self liberating!

“My mind was always very cluttered, so I took great pains to simplify my environment, because if my environment was half as cluttered as my mind, I wouldn’t be able to make it from room to room.”
             — Leonard Cohen

Leonard Norman Cohen CC GOQ (September 21, 1934 – November 7, 2016) was a Canadian poet, songwriter, singer, musician, and novelist. His work explored religion, politics, isolation, sexuality, and personal relationships.[2] Cohen was inducted into the Canadian Music Hall of Fame, the Canadian Songwriters Hall of Fame, and the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. He was a Companion of the Order of Canada, the nation's highest civilian honour. In 2011, Cohen received one of the Prince of Asturias Awards for literature and the ninth Glenn Gould Prize.

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