Wednesday, March 2, 2016

1347 THE MIRACULOUS EXPERIENCE OF NURTURING EACH BRAND NEW LIFE

Every wondrous experience that offers my spirit reason to soar makes such an indelible impression on my mind as to deem my memory capable of resurrecting that sense of pure joy as though each experience, which had thoroughly thrilled me, is happening, right now.  Want an example?  Okay ... let's buckle up and hold on tight, because once I throw the gear shift of my memory into reverse, we'll flash back to spring of 1968, when my spirit had reason to float on cloud 9, over a span of nine months (short of three weeks), and here's why that's true:  I'd felt as though no woman before me had ever nurtured the precious gift of life, which had incredulously begun to develop from an egg and a sperm into a real live person within my womb.

As seeing is believing, my story teller plans to show you how often a positive approach to life offers my sense of wonderment free rein to burst into bloom each time my conscious awareness begins to sense a miraculous change for the better, shaping up deep within me or someone I love, and once this miraculous (step by step) change for the better has had time to ripen, everyone concerned reaps unexpected rewards ... I mean, let's face it ... you'd not relish eating an orange that's still tiny, hard to peel and green around the gills unless starvation has addled your mind, right!

I plan to show you what made me hold myself accountable for learning to do my best to raise a trio of precious babes to embrace a well rounded sense of self as each child grew toward manhood.  In order to achieve this goal, each child was nourished with a balanced diet of roots and wings before I watched them fly off, one by one, into the world as a gift straight from my heart.

As to those last three weeks of my first pregnancy—severe back aches tempered the soaring nature of my spirit without dampening my incredulous sense of adventure for this reason:  My sights remained focused on my just reward for having mustered the courage to bear excruciating pain until the miracle of a brand new life was cradled, safely, in my arms, at which time my natural sense of wonderment felt immeasurably enhanced, and every time I smiled down at each child, sleeping peacefully neath my protective wing, this mother hen 'knew' without a shadow of doubt, that my brand new role of motherhood filled my heart with contentment, born of familial love.  I mean, seriously ... You've been getting a bird's eye view of thoughts streaming freely through the mind of a teacher who'd loved other people's children so much as to have deemed herself mother of the year before having raised even one child of her own.

All kidding aside, if I'd showered the children of others with oodles of love, just think of how much love would pour naturally from the well spring of my heart when those mini peeps, sheltered neath my wing, were my own!  During that early time in my life, when I was still a beginner adult, I'd believed that love conquers all ... all by itself,  but then, in defense of my naïveté, I'd no clue that just as "joy is an inside job", so is listening for intuitive thought coaxing your conscious mind to ready itself to take each next cautious step forward into the great unknown until your self confident voice, feeling strengthened by flashes of insight, brightens your spirit's way toward leaving dark visions of possible failure behind while shining a spotlight upon the leap of faith that proves necessary to throw off the dark cape of fear, born of undeserved guilt, thus re-energizing your voice to release every atom that deems you wholly (not to be confused with holier than thou) free to reap your just rewards for this reason:  Your good natured patience has offered the olive sized orange time to develop into a juicy, suculent treat, suggesting that when you finally taste the fruit of your labor, your first bite is sure to be so sweet as to nourish healthy bonds amongst your heartmindbodyspiritconnection straight into your soul, where a wealth of intuitive knowledge, passed down through the ages  (by way of DNA, safely encased within egg and sperm) has been encouraging your latent sense of anxious inner conflict, to melt away, and once tight springs of tension, which had tangled your roots, unwind, your wing will unfurl so naturally as to free you achieve a heartfelt goal, which, over your lifetime has been maddeningly, tantalizingly just beyond your reach ... And if you ask how I know this last string of insights is true, through and through, I'd reply, loud and clear  ... HAVENT YOU BEEN LISTENING TO A WORD I'VE SAID?  Perhaps you're in need of a transfusion of my DNA into wherever your defensive wall has layered up inside your head!  Jeesh!

Many years before became aware of how often intuitive thought had guided my conscious mind to take one unexpected step after another into unexplored territory, I, too, had no clue as to the frequency with which sparks of insight had cautioned the bright side of my mind to separate my light hearted path from those whose negatively focused, darkly colored thought patterns had differed from my own.  And though reflection suggests that positive focus has been integral to my decision-making process at each stage of my life, I had no conscious clue of this next fact, until recently:  Each time sparks of insight guided my path toward experiencing pain—which, generally, accompanies any change, which proves as monumental as laboring toward birthing a child—ultimately, every one of those growing pains culminated in change for the better, providing my pleasure center with reason to enjoy immeasurable sensations of joy.  And with results proving as profoundly positive as that, I'd be nuts not to follow the arrows by which intuitive thought directs my conscious mind to look this way and that in hopes of learning this or that while carving my path, step by step, straight ahead in hopes that by some quirk of fat em which My awareness cannot fathom yet, one day, which has yet to dawn, my path will intersect with a sense of success that comes when opposing thought patterns find middle ground upon which conflicting views relax, at least enough for both to feel at home ...

Once reflection suggested that intuitive thought had encouraged my conscious mind to hold onto my courage each time my quest to create change for the better offered pain before gain, I came to realize this fact of life:  Little by little, one mental breakthrough, leading, painfully toward the next, had need to tunnel through layers of subconscious denial before each mental breakthrough gained enough inner strength to reach through my defensive wall, thus shocking my conscious mind, which had repressed all knowledge of fearsome secrets that Mother Nature had thought best to place in a coma-like state until such time as my inner strengths outweighed the haunting sense of terror, which had recently been diagnosed as PTSD.  I guess you could say that certain secrets, which I'd kept from myself had need to tunnel through my brain just as one by one, each brand new baby son had had need to tunnel through my birth canal until each fully formed, healthy child 'felt' lovingly held within the safe haven of my embrace, and fortunately, my power of intuition 'knew' without a doubt that each offspring and I had been blessed with the potential to co-create a loving friendship, (patterned after that which had been true of my parents and me).  On the other hand, intuitive thought, concerning my need to work, instinctively, to repair the injured portion of my friendship with myself, remained subconsciously  blocked from my conscious awareness for decades to come—Why?  Because Mother Nature works in mysterious ways until an inquisitive mind sets out on a quest to know oneself in depth—Why?  Because the unexamined life is blocked from experiencing degrees of personal growth, necessary to resolve inner conflicts, which otherwise defeat clear-headedness—repeatedly ... and though examining subconscious fears may prove painful, you can trust me when this voice of experience suggests that exorcizing repressed pain is worth gaining peace of mind, which unlocks the door behind which light hearted joy bursts forth, unburdened by undeserved guilt, at last.

What I'm saying is this:  Once I'd firmly placed my faith in intuitive thought brightening my mind with insight, which continued to spotlight a path, paved with common sense, I experienced mental breakthroughs, which opened closed mindsets, based in fear of failure, and each time mind expansion was mine, I found my creative juices considering change for the better, which proved necessary each time fate offered my intelligence reason to re-examined a thinking pattern, which proved out of date, and therefore unhealthy to embrace as my own ... As each mental breakthrough came in the nick of time, another layer of defensive denial had sound reason to melt down, and though my psyche felt naked, while everyone else hid behind their persona's defensive masks, ultimately, my chosen path detoured round the necessity of recovering from the total mental breakdowns, suffered by those whose thinking patterns remain blind to insight, working tirelessly to brighten the mind to seek common sense while everyone else is running around like chickens without heads, so utterly immersed within the dark side of mental confusion as to feel too blinded by fear to see or hear that the guiding light of the force of insight beckons from within the most self confident portion of your brain and mine ...

As, EMDR therapy has recently offered me reason to pinpoint and reflect, meaningfully, over wounded aspects of my relationship with myself, I can see why intuitive thought had need to coach me to muster up whales of patience until my conscious mind had swallowed, digested and absorbed strings of insights, each of which had sparked the next, until the dark side of my mind brightened enough to fathom why my attention had focused, hyper-vigilantly upon raising my children to develop and believe in a host of personal strengths, which I'd had need to develop within myself.  Lucky for me, I chose to parent with an open mind, focused upon my growing consciously skilled at role modeling a step-by-step approach to resolving long standing conflicts in knowledgable, compassionate ways in hopes of creating and enjoying a family environment in which every heart, mind and spirit felt so worthy of love as to grow toward adulthood,  feeling personally respected and emotionally safe.  In short, adult temper tantrums, which scare vulnerable young minds into submission—or else!—had been replaced with positive methods of discipline, which, employed with consistency, actually created change for the better, from our first open eyes, good morning smiles to our bathe, brush teeth, have a drink, flush the toilet, pull up PJ's, hop into bed, enjoy storytime and The Three-Minute-Miracle, hug, kiss and smile, good night!  And as each child was blessed to feel nurtured as a valuable individual within a knowledgable, emotionally well-balanced environment, this trio grew to maturity, leaning naturally toward recreating the same sense of personal safety while nurturing children neath their wings, suggestive of the fact that apples do not fall far from the tree, which is why the fruit of our labor is flavored with this trait from one parent and that trait from the other ...

As to why siblings pick up opposite traits ... well, more about that curious phenomenon, offering  food for thought, later ...

Though I'd no clue, fifty years ago, of how often positively focused, intuitive thought served as my ally, the teacher in me (whose sense of humor loves leading children to enjoy learning) was acutely aware of this fact:  The most intelligent portion of my conscious mind remained open to seeking out leadership skills, and thank goodness for that, because once my first born miracle began to mimic parental authority, his reactions to my emotional reactiveness demonstrated this fact:  By the age of two, Barry's bright, little mind had quickly absorbed the impactful power of standing his ground by staring straight into his opponent's eyes while replying (to my request that he do this or not do that) for all to hear:  NO!

The reason we say ''out of the mouth of babes', is because pretense, which patterns into a persona, doth not yet exist.  Whatever smallfry truly feel is said and shown—loudly, clearly, self assertively—unless our tantrums scare them out of their wits—at which time, layers of resentful rebellion begin to built up within the subconscious portion of our children's minds.

When Barry was a toddler, I'd never thought to become my child's primary opponent within the first two years of his life.

And I'd no clue of the fact that each time I observed my child's need to practice the natural formation of self assertive thought patterns (which proved independent of parental authority), Barry was making his way through a classic stage of child development in that he had need to voice his unique state of being for all to see and hear, just as Mother Nature had intended him to do ...

As for me, I had a thing or two to learn about taming my reactiveness while simultaneously working to channel my child's reactions to mimic my calm, solution-seeking attitude, which had need to master a whale of patience necessary to championing the concept of change for the better in the step-by-step manner, which proves classically true for all, who are blessed with raising children to grow up to become fast friends with siblings and parents as has proven true of our family, over these past 47 years, because each time naysayers believed our ship had sunk, our 'blendship' of teamwork, intuitive thought, and combined personal strengths encouraged our one for all and all for one attitudes to puzzle our way toward getting shipshape in the nick of time ... And it's my plan to show you how I learned to identify, acknowledge, and correct my own mistakes, story by story ...

Need I say, that watching my angelic, first born miracle transform into my worthy opponent within the short span of two years time came as shock to this teacher, who'd loved other people's children so much as to feel eager to nurture, enjoy and swing as high as a treetop with a sweet natured child of my own, laughing gaily, in my lap!  And though Barry and I had enjoyed a wide variety of activities, countless times, if the truth be told, our frustration with each other's thought patterns clashed, like discordant cymbals, too often for my peace of mind ... And as I was the adult and my child was only two, guess which one had need to shore up on leadership skill???

Upon venturing forth with child in arms into the great unknown
I'd not expected our morning dressing routine to transform into round one ...
I'd not expected our play dates to turn me into referee as a pair of
Two fisted tykes, who'd balked at sharing anything, duked it out in round two
I did not expect my beautiful, blue eyed, dark haired son to enter the ring and
Clang the bell announcing the start of round three each time
His choices differed from my own ...
I did not expect to half lose my mind by lunch time—day after day—I mean ...
I was a teacher of children, who had  shown respect for my authority ...  RIGHT???
And to think that I'd thought to double our fun by choosing to become
Impregnated with Barry's little brother when our first born was sixteen months, so that
Nine months later the miracle of Steven's presence offered Barry reason to confront
Opponent number two, two weeks before big brother's second birthday, suggesting
My having been so naive as to have believed myself empowered to
Control two independent little minds just because
I'd deemed myself Group Leader in Charge Over All, as though
This pair of toddlers had contracted to cheerfully follow The Pied Piper's lead ...
HA!  Fat chance of a wondrous miracle like that taking place for this parenting rookie, raising siblings ... until my open minded ear began to absorb a wealth of information, concerning positive motivation techniques, which an experienced coach had offered up for my consideration ...

Thank goodness, my unending quest to absorb (and impart) mutually respectful character traits directed my creativity to carve out a knowledgable path, upon which I gained insight, step by step, into coaching three independent, fertile minds to grow up to value, understand and absorb the mental processes, which prove necessary if each individual in a family is to feel every bit as supportively interconnected whenever life offers us reason to resolve conflicts as teammates with separate skills, and thus do we encourage each other to win at the game of life much more often than not ...

 Upon reflection, forty-seven years after birthing my first born, deeper truth suggests that each time life has offered me an experience that feels miraculous, challenging, thrilling, disheartening or exceedingly painful, every atom, which makes up the sum of my whole, has learned to muster positive focus, patience and self control while my natural emotional reactions process through classic stages of change until all of me feels mentally readied, spiritually re-energized and emotionally fired up so as to ensure that no matter what fate offers up, next, my state of mind will remain focused on creating change for the better, and as seeing is believing and as my story teller feels ever more ready to show you how often this impassioned, knowledge-seeking reaction to life's pleasures and pains remains true of me, today ... I'd like to end this post by saying:

Tis true that "joy is an inside job", however
That's not to say that joy is not contagious, as well
And if a picture is worth a thousand words—
Then, here, once again, are several snapshots of
Every day family life, caught on camera
Illustrating spontaneous moments of joy, which
Each person in our family has been blessed to share
Over these last forty-seven years ...
(Need I say, moments of joy amongst siblings did not fill each hour of the day)

On the other hand, with compassionate leadership skills coaching all three
This trio of musketeers absorbed the art of resolving conflicts with
Positive focus intact, and as minds—taught to absorb similar patterns of thought
Tend to draw forth solution-seeking skills, which offer reason for
Conflict resolution to culminate in good humored smiles
You can see how often each spirit leaned naturally toward one another, each time
My camera encouraged three brothers' faces to express another shared moment of joy

 If upon viewing the photo below
You'd like to ask:  Where was Will?
I'll ask for your patience, because
Your curiosity is sure to be addressed when the story
Associated with this photo appears on your screen


 Throughout the years, no matter where we were, three
Intelligent, well balanced guys felt at ease blowing off steam
Hanging together, or just clowning around, when they weren't
Intent on teasing each other, as siblings are known to do!





As these musketeers grew to manhood
It was clear to see that, each time good fortune
Smiled upon one, three hearts glowed with joy from the inside out


And thankfully, none has lost his natural ability to act silly in public






















When it came time to expand our family
I lucked out, again, as gals began to equalize in number with guys


As stories unfold, you'll see how our family has continued to
Work patiently in hopes of expanding our numbers, joyfully, so as to
Feel assured that each heart, which is treasured by one of us
Feels embraced by all of us, thus ensuring that
No matter what tragic circumstance or unexpected surprise
Fate offers each of us to handle, no one's heart is left to
Fend on its own as long as our collective attitude remains ...
One for all and all for one ...


As we became blessed with the addition of little ones
Our family's joyful traditions continued to deepen beyond measure









Though many stories will offer you a bird's eye view of
Our family making its way through times of crises by way of
Shoring up personal strengths, no photos were taken to commemorate
The heartfelt pain, felt by one and all, so
Thank goodness, I'm drawn to paint pictures with words ... and
Now that this introductory pictorial, showing the joyous side of
Family life, has zipped forward through the first 49 years of
Raising our sons to evolve into each other's most supportive confidants and
Best friends, I'll end today's post with this photo of Will holding me while
I, cradling Ravi in my arms, can't help but feel wondrous while
Celebrating our 49th anniversary in March of 2015, suggesting that
Our fiftieth is fast approaching—I mean, can you imagine how
Incredulous it feels to be old enough to be married for fifty years while
I'm laughing and twirling, round and round, my living room, as is Ravi, who
As usual, can be seen mimicking everything I do, suggesting
My sweet-natured, bright eyed grand daughter was laughing while twirling, too ...
Had I been able to twirl and video, simultaneously, you'd see why it's true that
Though 71 years separates our ages, my spirit and Ravi's both share
Sound reason for feeling younger than springtime ... and
Now, that David's flown home and knowing that Steven and Ravi
Are due to ring our chimes, momentarily—hopefully ...
Before too long, we'll find time to jump into my time machine, buckle up
And zoom back to 1968, where we'll watch my twenty-five year old spirit
Feeling utterly incredulous of the fact that
The wondrous miracle of egg and sperm have combined to form
A brand new, human being, which was actually developing within
The expansive elasticity of my body, which (though
Our mindsets may fool us), always tells the truth, concerning
Whatever is processing through change—deep inside ...

No comments:

Post a Comment