What if Stranger Danger is not lurking behind a tree at the park, in the school yard or half way around the world?
What if this terrorist lurks closer to home-sweet-home than we know?
What if a terror-struck child, who has experienced reason to swallow the development of the self assertive portion of his or her voice can't ask for help?
If home sweet home is to provide each beloved child with safe haven from harm then what must parents teach children to develop in addition to well mannered social skills?
A self assertive voice.
As a self assertive voice is the direct opposite of docile obedience (born of fear of parental anger, which, in retrospect, proves to have been over reactive), that creates a dilemma for every parent and child to work through, together, and since the child is a rookie at the game of creating a harmonic life while the parent is a seasoned player at working through strife, guess which one of the two is responsible for consciously guiding both toward developing a mutually respectful relationship, where the concept of teamwork is valued, upheld and enjoyed by the family as a whole, meaning that leadership is accountable for modeling self control ...
If only the spirit of Socrates had swooped down to whisper that fact into my parents' ears, I may have developed a self assertive voice to save myself from the terrorist in our midst ... but that was not to be.
If that information, concerning a team-like attitude, had been mine when Barry was a babe in my arms it's likely that I'd have sought a manner of speaking that would have channeled our spirits to sidestep power struggles, which naturally ensued when the independent nature of my precious, first born child turned two, and as my conscious quest to deepen my sense of self awareness did not get underway until Barry was an adult, I feel thankful for the fact that my think tank was openly attentive (rather than defensively closed minded) when a neighbor invited me to attend bi-monthly parenting sessions, under the auspices of The Family Education Assoc., where I listened to social workers offer constructive instruction to parents, concerning disciplining children with a compassionate sense of positive focus intact.
Thank goodness, my brain did more than listen with my ears. Thank goodness, my brain had eagerly absorbed every healthy morsel of information, which encouraged my leadership skills to develop, little by little, session by session, as The Pied Piper, within me, continued to develop.
As common sense suggests that most parents would find it helpful to know how I learned to detour away from power struggling with Barry's independent spirit before he turned three, I feel eager to return to those days of yesteryear, before Barry turned two, suggesting that at the start of the first story (which will be penned as soon as time allows), you'll watch my innate power of intuition direct my parental responsibility to make certain that all of my offspring would grow up feeling so well nourished, safe and healthy while being nurtured under my wing as to demonstrate the depth of my love and respect for each one's unique individuality, resulting in all of my sons developing into three of my best friends. And if your inquisitive nature wonders what caused my power of intuition to filter my need to discipline my sons respectfully into my conscious mind, the answer to that riddle will become obvious as parenting story number one unfolds. On the other hand, I'd counted both of my parents amongst my best friends, so I'd assumed that the same would hold true for my children and me ... which is why power struggling with two year old Barry came as such a huge surprise!
When time allows, I plan to whisk you back to the winter of 1971, because by that time, my beloved, first born son had been listening to the word 'NO' flying out of his mother's mouth more frequently than I'd been consciously aware ... and as little monkey-faces copy everything they see and hear, reminding us that the apple doth not fall far from the tree, guess which word my precious, two year old child began to favor above all others ... except for 'cookie'!
BTW ... As story telling demands much more concentration than penning insights, which flow intuitively out of my mind as though all on their own, please muster plenty of patience for this reason: I can't say when the time will feel wholly natural for this story (which part of me feels eager to write, right now) to flow effortlessly out of my memory bank. So between now and then, every post that shows up on your screen will be one that has filtered from the intuitive portion of my mind into my conscious awareness, as is true of the post that you're reading, right now ...
And speaking of 'now', tis time to ready myself for whatever my busy, winter calendar suggests has been planned for today in readiness to warmly welcome house guests, whose arrival, tomorrow, will
extend over two weeks ... the first of which will be with us and the second will be spent with mutual friends, who have enjoyed owning a winter desert retreat for quite a few years, where they reside until Spring breezes thaw their primary home from frigid temperatures, laced with ice, sleet and
snow. As you shall see, installing a revolving door between February and April makes perfectly good sense ...
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