Once, while driving one of my kids to an appointment, I asked if I was talking too much. (If I had one child in the car with me, distractions like ear phones, game boys, and reading materials (no cell phones, yet) were off limits. My concession to mutual respect was tolerating their music—as long as the volume on the radio was low.) As we all had busy schedules, I took full advantage of imparting insight into values to my kids whenever I had one-on-one time with a captive audience. So after asking if my teen ager was listening or just hearing: BLAHBLAHBLAH, I took in this reply: Well, to tell the truth, Mom, I tune in and out, so I don't always hear everything you say. But here's what holds my interest, most ... I'm always intrigued, while you're rambling, on and on, at how much of what you say makes sense and comes together in the end. Then we laughed, and I felt happily hopeful that at least some of my values were soaking into the spongy side of my child's impressionable, young mind.
Thank goodness we're people, not dogs or cats, which must learn survival tactics before leaving their parents in a matter of weeks.
Thank goodness we're people, who have at least eighteen years to develop, model and discuss a well balanced variety of high principled values with little monkey faces who say and do that which they most frequently hear and see.
Children who embrace positive change are raised by parents who pursue the same.
As patterns of positive change develop step-by-step, please do not mistake working toward improvement for working toward perfection at any stage of life.
Working toward perfection, on either side, would prove as unrealistically egocentric (thus—illogical) as working to resolve a conflict with a wounded bear—for ten years.
Ah Humility, thee graces my doorstep, so frequently. Thank goodness I've learned to place my ego in a time out chair, so I can open the door to my mind, welcome you in, and come to understand, today, that which left me feeling deeply confused, yesterday.
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