1468CCCC IF ... THEN

If
"Life is either a great adventure or else it is nothing"
If
Love is either a great adventure or else it is confusing
If
Confusion, left unresolved, grows frustrating
If
Frustration grows emotionally combustive
If
Fear of emotional combustion had reason to develop during childhood
And if
Change is the only constant in life
Then
When faced with confusion that remains unresolved
My desire to give and receive love, freely, has need to absorb
Such a gracious stance of positively focused flexibility as to
Withstand the emotional turbulence that's bound to
Emerge whenever so much as a hInt of my fear of
Rejection seeps through a crack in my wall of
Emotional denial, signaling my survival instinct
(Fight/flee/freeze) to arise, so in order to ensure that
My fear-based reaction to any possibility of rejection does
Not hot-wire a latent sense of anxiety to spike so high as to
Shut down my brain's natural connection to logical processing
I muster the patience to make no decisions until
My intuitive voice (sensing my need to think out of the box)
Can coach my conscious awareness to keep soothing
My survival instinct until inner tension feels so relaxed as to
Release my smarts to conceive of a proactive plan such as
This one proves to be:
If
Change is the only constant in life and
If
Human nature has contrasting sides (fear and courage)
Then
Common sense (being a by product of logic) inspires
My sense of wholeness to restructure the courageous
Side of my nature to calm my defensive side, thus
Ensuring that my wit doth not hotwire a loved one's
Human vulnerability to jumpstart yesteryear's unresolved
Pain, and with this proactive plan in mind I can remain so
Well-grounded as to consciously call forth generosity of
Spirit to flood my think tank with thoughts of love so that
If
You offered me reason to sense that I may have
Said or done something to have stimulated
Your defense system to withdraw from connection
Then
I'll rely upon my intuitive sensitivity to nip a game of
Tug of war in the bud for this reason:
Once two defense systems take turns playing tag
Both hearts experience meaningful reconnection growing
Ever more hesitant for this reason:
Fear of rejection on both sides erects two walls of
Denial that prove as doubly divisive as is true of
Invisible walls, which separate(d)
North Vietnam from South Vietnam
North Korea from South Korea
Western ideology from Eastern ideology
North from South
Republicans from Democratics
Man from woman
Parent from child
So, speaking 'soully' for my whole existential self ...
Please take note of my conscientious state of logic
Placing my defense system (along with
Any residual hint of inner conflict) in time out
Thus liberating my think tank to feel free of
Inner tension so as to function (not as
A passive aggressive divider but rather)
As an enthusiastic yet relaxed conductor of
Deeply meaningful humanistic reconnection  ...
And that, my friends, proves to be
A realistic, heartfelt goal, based in a loving sense of
Mutual respect, worth realizing by one and all

1468CCC IF CONFUSION INDICATES NEED FOR CHANGE THEN ...

"Life is either a great adventure or else it is nothing"
Love is either a great adventure or else it is confusing
And if change is the only constant in life then
Unresolved confusion, which disrupts mental clarity
Creates inner tension that, over time, grows combustive
And if emotional combustion disrupts mental serenity
Then feeling under siege, stimulates our survival instinct to
Call forth our defense systems to erect walls of denial
Behind which are stuffed naturally impassioned
Emotional reactions that our repressive society deems unruly
And as patching cracks in denial's wall consumes
More mental energy than our conscious minds are aware
Our efforts to restrain emotionally combustible
Reactions, which have been buried alive, undermine
The robust nature of a person's good health, suggesting
Why, eventually, your power of intuitive intelligence, like mine
Will tend to encourage your conscious mind to release a
Build up of inner tension by yelling or developing the readiness to
Embrace the role of miner, questing ever more
Thoroughly into the depths of your memory bank in
Hopes of spotlighting veins of buried treasure, also
Known as insights, which highlight deeper truths that will
Open your eyes to the primary reason that stimulates
Ohhmmm to switch tracks to Hmmmm ... and now that
Today's quest for insight had shed light on
Human need to detect the primary reason why layers of
Emotional combustion, buried alive, continue to
Feel need to slip through cracks in our walls of denial
We begin to understand why your peace of mind and mine
Will continue to feel undermined until
An inexplicable subconscious awareness of intuitive
Readiness stimulates your conscious intelligence and mine
To sense reason to stop our defense systems from patching
Those cracks in favor of mustering the courage to tolerate
The anxious tension that accompanies each deeper truth, which
Proves ready to slip out—and lo and behold—I can feel
The emergence of a *deeper truth which (like a baby chick
Hatching by pecking instinctively through proverbial
Darkness until it realizes the promise of sunlit sustenance
Once freed of its self protective shell, )
Will offer my conscious mind sound reason to pull
Today's train of thought into the rest station that's
Beckoning directly ahead:  *Tis not the wall that's
Been in need of reconstruction but rather
Every self-liberating thought and impassioned emotion that
A repressive society has brain washed me to
Stuff behind that wall so as to block my conscious awareness
From acknowledging my existential need to expand
My adult comprehension of life and love beyond that of
A frightened child's stunted sense of self denegrading
Self perpetuating, self deprecation, which is the primary
Source of the inner conflict that's been clamoring
To squeeze through denial's cracks in order to free
The true nature of the primary inner conflict that
Authority figures teach us to stuff so that
The powers-that-be have no need to debate deeper
Truths, which, when openly confronted, prove in need of
Serious reconsideration if we who people the planet
Earth are to withstand the gigantic growth spurt that's
Been percolating concerning our need to freely embrace
A series of leaps of faith, each of which requires
Society to develop an emotionally matured acceptance of
This reality:  Just as perpetual happiness is not
A realistic goal, neither is perpetual serenity, and if
Your intuitive intelligence feels need to ask mine why
I felt need to clarify such an obvious deeper truth for
Myself upon awakening, today, I'd say:
Mental readiness to tackle life's most sensitive issues
Has been boiling over on a worldwide basis, day after day
Suggesting that giving lip service to the concepts of
Equality and Brotherhood is in need of soulful
Contemplation if we are to develop the ability to
Think clearly for ourselves in hopes of energizing
This spiritually uplifting change for the better:
Once more of us come to embrace the fact that frustration
And anxiety are by products of unexpected change, we begin to
Understand why unresolved confusion, buried alive, exacerbates
Anxiety (based in repressed frustration growing ever more
Combustible by the day) to spike—and with today's string of
Insights in mind, we can more readily alert
Our conscious processors of need to contemplate
Classic aspects of life, love and passion with a greater sense of
Existential intuition leading the way than
Had felt possible during childhood at which time
Our opinionated attitudes had been shaped by
Authority figures, who dominated an emotionally repressive society—

During recent years, I've awaken feeling more courageous than
Anxious when intuitive trains of thought stream freely through
My conscious mind, and here's why that's true:
Each time I choose to place my instinctive
(Defensive) reactions In time out, another aspect of
My central inner conflict, squeezes itself more naturally into
The conscious portion of my think tank, so rather than feeling
Anxious when Ohhmmm switches tracks to Hmmm, my assertive voice
Authorizes my attitude of positively focused, existential leadership to
Inspire both sides of my nature to conspire to take
Small cautious steps toward accomplishing a series of
Leaps of faith until, inspired by the spotlight of insight
My landing gear senses readiness to lower its wheels in
Unexplored territory, where my soulful connection to
Intuitive intelligence re-fuels my spirit to bask in
The conscious awareness of having worked to free
My brain of society's guilt-ridden dictates of self-deprecation in
Favor of thinking so expansively for myself as to
Ban my fear of inner conflict from shaking its finger, shaming
Me into feeling selfish for so much as entertaining
Thoughts of experiencing highly personalized joys that may
Delight my spirit's impassioned connection to
Life as I age, and though I have naught but a hint of
A clue as to why my spirit feels suddenly as sensuously
Refreshed as if my pleasure center has chosen to frolic as
Light-heartedly as did Gene Kelly, whose tap shoes splashed
Merrily through a gentle Spring shower, I can offer you a one word
Description of the serene sense of happiness that
Today's inkling of deeper truth has just whispered into my heart's
Hopeful ear ... and that glorious word, which proves so
Endearing as to withstand my current sense of combustible
Confusion is love ... Why love?  Because love hath
Inspired my soul to pilot a series of courageous
Solo flights ever more graciously into the great unknown, where
Hopefully, some day this fully spirited time traveler's self confident
Expansive wing span will inevitably land my rebalanced
Time machine on a runway so effortlessly as to inspire
My mind's eye to absorb a newfound sense of
Inner peace, restructured in such a flexible, guilt free fashion as to
Liberate my soul's pleasure center to clarify how best to fulfill
My emotional needs without losing sight of my think tank's
Wholesome sense of conscientious, compassionate consideration of
Others, whose existential needs differ greatly from my own ...

1468CC EARTH TO ANNIE ...

During the still of the night
Someone (who couldn't possibly be me)
Hacked into my blog and tucked
Additional insights into yesterday's Post
So here I am with nary a soapbox to stand on
Because, my focus is quietly taking that intuitive
Leap of faith with no flight plan or
Landing field in sight ... and if you ask
Why would anyone in their right mind
Choose to do a crazy thing like that
I'll pull a pair of quotations out of my thinking cap:

Life is either a great adventure or else it is nothing
           ~Helen

Love is either a great adventure or else fill the blank
          ~Annie

1468C IF LIFE IS SHORT THEN WHY WAIT TILL SUNDOWN?

With so many strings of insight highlighted
Within yesterday's post, intuition is coaching
My think tank to relax in hopes of absorbing
(More deeply than ever before) that which
Creativity hath most recently penned, suggesting
Why the 'soul' advancement you'll find in
Today's post appears in the title, and
Being that the bees buzz'in inside my head
Have need to rest, and since today is Friday
When, beginning at sundown, the Jewish Sabbath
Welcomes wearied time-travelers to embrace
A quiet sense of inner peace, I'll make good use of
Clarity to convey my newly conceived definition of
Positive focus;  If I am to truly embrace
An attitude of positive focus then that suggests
Mindfully offering my brain the gift of assuming
An angle of repose by setting my defense system
Aside in favor of taking this heartfelt leap of faith ...
Rather than feeling need to assert
My self respecting voice in hopes of gratifying
My existential needs, I'll wholly believe that with each
Peaceful beat of my heart, love, surging naturally
Forth from within the depths of my soul, will inspire
Connection with those whom my spirit longs to
Embrace, and if hugging each other is not
To be then, once again, will I inspire myself to
Wholly embrace humility while soothing
The ache in my heart by quietly emoting ... Ohhmmm
You see, rather than chasing or feeling caught or
Bemoaning my fate, I've come to see myself walking quietly
Forward, eyes wide open seeking insight, while sporting
A spirited smile mindful of hope buoying my heart
And if this was a book, I'd write THE END
Luckily, my niece implored me to write a blog
See what blogging and Ohhmmming can do?
Reboot my spirit's serenity and sense of humor in one fell swoop!

1468 (B's a buzz'in). EXPANDED VERSION OF THREE STEP PLAN TO REGAIN SERENITY

At times when I feel incapable of

Completing a simple task

Tis not a question of 'finding time' but

Rather a matter of instinct alerting

My think tank to bide its time until

A relaxed sense of inner peace has

Been regained, and that proves especially
True in the aftermath of a sweeping
Sensation of deeply suppressed
Emotion, which having threatened to
Knock down my wall of denial, would have
Released a deeper truth that, if exposed

Would free an inner conflict that

My defense system had thought best to

Suppress, and if my fear of exhuming

That emotional conflict, which has remained
 Buried alive, conjoins with my original fear of

Emotional complexity, left unresolved

During childhood, then we can see why

Thoughts of that simple task served as
The catalyst, which swirled my think tank into
Such a chaotic state of disarray as to render

My processor too confused to connect

The dots in such a logical fashion as to

Comprehend this fact:  Today's

Train of intuitive thought is making headway
Toward spotlighting two fears, which
Having conjoined into one, have 
Spun my connection to logical reasoning
Just beyond my grasp, suggesting that
My doubled fear of emotional combustion
Feels too complex for serenity to handle, and
As our defense systems have no concept of
Time or space, my head spin had not been able to
Clarify how one fear had exacerbated the other
And thus does today's string of intuitive
Insights heighten our conscious awareness to
Comprehend why thoughts of that simple task
Spun my sense of personal safety back to
A terrifying time when, at the vulnerable age of
Three, I experienced the terror of
Irretrievable loss, which had devastated
Every member of my extended family, suggesting that

A significant portion of my current reaction
Is directly related to subliminal flashbacks from
My distant past at which time my brain's potential
To remain securely connected to logical reasoning
(During times of personal crises) had not
Yet developed, and thus doth insight cajole us to
Consider this fact:  Over my lifetime
Unresolved fear of being swept into
The eye of an uncontrolled emotional tornado
Has made a time-traveler of my brain, most especially
When a split second flash of subliminal
Awareness (stimulated by a current event) zooms
Back and forth across my personal timeline
Conjoining adulthood with early childhood within
Milliseconds, spinning my conscious awareness toward
Re-experiencing an anxious child's fear of
Explosive emotional complexity, which, over the years
Has grown to assume such spectral proportions as to
Stun my adult mind with sudden spikes of adrenaline-laden

Anxiety that make me feel as if a near and present danger is

Closing in, suggesting my mind reeling with feeling
The dark threat of The Spector of Death's chilling breath on
My neck, and with today's string of insights clearly in sight

My newfound sense of clarity, concerning this week's

Head spinning fear of explosive emotion associating with
Irretrievable loss, answers why no amount of
Ohhmmm has relaxed my processor's intermittent 

Swirling sensations of anxiety over these last couple of

Days, highlighting the reason why my intuitive

Intelligence is presently working to consciously
Disconnect childhood's subconscious fear of death from
Today's adult conscious absorption of
Logical reasoning by choosing to call upon

Creativity to reorganize my think tank by
Conjuring up this simple three step plan of action:

Step one:

Offer myself the soothing patience that

I'd graciously gift a friend

Step two:

Choose to set the simple task aside

Until natural waves of emotion no longer

Threaten to overwhelm my peaceful

Connection to logic

Step three: Repeat steps one and two

Until thoughts of completing

This simple task match

My calmed sense of internal

Readiness to confront

A deeper truth concerning fear, which
Much to my surprise, has, by way of
Creative writing, managed to slip out of

Subconscious storage, and is

Presently sitting quietly in my lap
Staring me openly in the face, and

Having worked to know the intelligent

Adult whom I prove to be from

The inside out, I feel no secreted reason for

Anxiety to strike ... right now

And considering the fact that

Over these past two days my

Brain's consumption of energy

Has been trained upon patching

Cracks in my wall of denial

Thank goodness my power of

Intuition called forth creativity to

Divert my attention away

From fear in favor of penning this

Post, suggesting that once

My defense system lowered its

Guard, that stealthy little

Deeper truth slipped out of

Its subconscious hiding place

Through a crack in my wall of

Denial, and as one string of insights

Leads to the next, Lo and behold

We come to see how today's

Well-organized train of

Intuitive insights has come to

Spotlight this fact, as well:

Over these past few days

My connection to logic was only

Disrupted when specific thoughts

Concerning that simple task, aroused

Waves of deeply repressed

Emotion, which, proving as strong as

The night tide crashing darkly against

The shore, made me question why

Readiness to accomplish this

Simple task, peacefully, was not mine

Thank goodness, intuitive intelligence

Guided my conscious mind to identify

That insight concerning childhood's fear

Of flooding emotions exacerbatinG
My anxiety before my adult mind could
Consciously summon the inner strength
Necessary to confront emotional reactions
That proved so complex at the age of
Three as to have left me feeling utterly
Overwhelmed with grief of irretrievable loss
And thus is it plain to see why any thought
Relating to a simple task, which
Threatened to tap into depths of pain so
Great as to stimulate my survival instinct to
Call forth my defense system to stuff

Anything that felt remotely similar to my
Original feeling of emotional abandonment 
Right next to my diminished self worth, behind
My wall of denial, and thanks to my

Current understanding of

The eruptive nature of PTSD

I have sound reason to consider

This fact, as well:  The mere thought of

That simple task threatened to expose

All of those negatively focused, emotional
Reactions, which proved far too potent for

Ohhmmm to appease until 

My connection to intuitive intelligence

Beseeched my sense of compassion

To draw forth as much patience as

Proved necessary in hopes of

Re-adjusting my calm, courageous

Rebalanced sense of

Adult connection to clarity, which

Ultimately served to offer my natural

Sense of readiness the go-ahead ...

Ohhmmm

Ohhmmm

Ohhmmm

Hmmmm ...

While editing this post

Many memories of happiness

Directly related to completing

The simple task at hand

Arose to soothe waves of fear of

Emotional turbulence, thus

Calming the waters through

Which my life raft has just

Paddled, and as joyous memories
Reduce fear, significantly, I feel

The tide lapping against my shoreline

Much much more gently, today

Than had proved true in

Times past when my understanding

Of serenity as a choice had

Not yet developed, so though

The unedited version of

This post had originally ended with 

No green light, as of yet ...

Later in the day, intuitive thought
Empowered my conscious awareness

With successfully completing this

Simple task, suggesting that

Once childhood fear had reason to

Stop stalking my adult sense of emotional

Maturity, my conscious awareness

No longer felt overwhelmed by

Spiking anxiety, so once again

I have reason to thank

Intuitive intelligence for calling upon

Creative thinking, which spotlights

Insights that brighten my adult mind to

Expand toward feeling so securely
Grounded as to inspire today's

Emotionally matured, self assured

Sense of wholeness to embrace another

Personal growth spurt, which has offered my

Think tank an angle of repose that

Has enhanced my ability to relax while

Fulfilling a heartfelt goal ... OHHMMM

1468 (followed by a hive filled with B's) WHENEVER MY MIND'S EYE OPENLY ADMITS TO HAVING NO CLUE AS TO WHAT ANOTHER MAY BE THINKING OR FEELING, COMMON SENSE CUES HUMILITY TO TAKE CENTER STAGE

Today. I found this post in drafts, making me wonder if
It had been published and then withdrawn:

"Helen Keller was an author, lecturer, and crusader for the handicapped. Born physically normal in Tuscumbia, Alabama, Keller lost her sight and hearing at the age of nineteen months to an illness now believed to have been scarlet fever. Five years later, on the advice of Alexander Graham Bell, her parents applied to the Perkins Institute for the Blind in Boston for a teacher, and from that school hired Anne Mansfield Sullivan. Through Sullivan’s extraordinary instruction, the little girl learned to understand and communicate with the world around her. She went on to acquire an excellent education and to become an important influence on the treatment of the blind and deaf."

While re-reading the paragraph above, can you spot which fact proves most enlightening when considering how insight may serve to heighten a person's perceptive awareness?

The fact in question (coupled with my having felt mesmerized, over these past two years, by everything Ravi's bright young mind has soaked in, day after day, week upon week) suggests that by the age of 19 months, Helen's mental awareness and sweetly inquisitive nature had likely absorbed a wealth of sights and sounds so as to have stimulated her spirit to actively participate in family life, as has been true of our sunshine child, who early on began to parrot back more of our words, physical reactions, facial expressions, body language, feisty 'teasy-ness' , animal sounds and hysterical behaviors than we, who make up her doting audience, could believe as each of us marveled aloud at the charming demeanor of this small child's eagerness to fill the mental capacity of her processor by absorbing, depositing, storing and offering back everything she sees and hears while demonstrating her fledgling understanding of the world she inhabits as shown by her animated reactive responses which, rather than merely mimicking ours, had, before the age of two, begun to carve out a path of her own:  I a princess.  I love horses.  I a ballerina.  Shhh ... A 'monter' sleeping in
Annie's room. (Though everyone referred to me as Gramma Annie, Ravi didn't tack on the Gramma part until after she'd turned two) ... I remember wondering:  How is it possible that this bright-minded toddler can point to one of her toy horses and pipe up with 'Appaloosa' but not say 'Gramma'?  And though intuitive thought offers me insight, quite often, concerning much that mystifies many highly educated, intelligent folk when we engage in mulling over the highly complex nature of the human brain's inner life, which, being a maze, influences our decision-making process more often than we know, I must admit to humility taking center stage at times when the absence of insight offers me not a clue as to what makes my loved ones tick, and when my think tank feels utterly mystified, my voice is rendered speechless until my processor can string together a series of words that makes sense, if not to anyone else, at least to me  ... 

Below, let's consider several snapshots of Ravi (I have at least 3,000 stored within my computer's memory bank—uh—hard drive), each showing the natural eagerness with which an adorable toddler's bright mind experiences moments of family life between the ages of one and two, starting with Papa's 74th birthday, last year, and ending with Papa's 75th birthday, several months ago.  In addition to participating in a spirited game of hide and seek before she was two, Ravi exhibited as much delight in hugging, kissing, tickling, teasing and cuddling up with her adoring family as we adore hugging, kissing, tickling, teasing and cuddling with her.  Over these past two years, this bright, lovable child, whose intelligence has been readily absorbing a fledgling awareness of need to tether natural demonstrations of frustration (I berry mad!) by asking for 'help peeze', Ravi has, without question, chosen to activate her membership in our family's mutual admiration society.  And when anything scares or displeases her, she runs to us  for safety ...

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