REACTIONS OF FAMILY AND FRIENDS TO THE WAY MY BRAIN THINKS

Having received health update #19, here’s one of many replies received from a couple, dear friends, whom I had the pleasure of meeting while they were honeymooning and I was pregnant with Barry.  Judy, a nurse, met Ron in the hospital when he was a resident in neurosurgery.  I chose their reply, because their response mirrors the impression of me offered up by most of my extended family and friends during this trying time in my life:

FABULOUS  NEWS!  Annie, you are teaching ALL of us how to deal with adversity. Thank you for all you share (it must be exhausting)!

Hugs from California,

Judy and Ron

My reply: 

Not exhausting at all, dear friends, as I don’t begin to write till words flow readily out of the depths of my mind so naturally that the weight of an inner conflict that’s subconscious in nature (meaning I’ve had no conscious awareness of lugging around a confounding mental burden) lifts as though all on its own, which offers my energy level sound reason to feel relieved of a heavy yoke, and once clarity is mine, my mental state, feeling freed of confusion concerning a difficult choice that’s in need of being made, my lost sense of wholeness revitalizes, spontaneously, from the inside out, stimulating my host of personal strengths to say:  Annie—You’ve got this.

In fact, this reply to your email is a prime example of my faith in the intuitive portion of my brain guiding my processor toward releasing trains of thought, which offer my conscious awareness glimpses of insights that shine a bright spotlight upon how best to restructure my personal perceptions of forgotten details, which once onboard, serve to deepen a sense of peaceful repose within me that proves necessary if I am to experience the zen environment, which, during trying times (that last overlong) requires guidance from deep within if a gracious hold onto my connection to sanity is to be maintained—Ohmm ❤️Annie

What do my family and friends make of responses, like this?  I think most think I’m smarter than I think I am, while others may see me arm in arm with Shirley MacLaine (which is A-okay with me).😊

As to how I’m feeling, today (noting that chemo is but a few hours away), if the truth be told, I feel more beaten up than up beat, but then, that’s to be expected knowing side effects to be cumulative—hopefully today’s infusion will be kinder to me than last week’s proved to be.  Following today’s infusion, only two to go—and Steven’s coming over with Ravi, this evening, in hopes of getting a jump over reactions that may emerge, later tonight.    One of my friends suggested wearing my Superman PJs to Mayo, today.  Now that would be a hoot, other than the fact that my port can’t be accessed while wearing a tee.

Annie🌈🌻