With the exception of my sons, I’ve been texting with family and friends rather than calling, because talking about these past several weeks threatens my mind to flood with anxiety, which I’ve managed to suppress just beneath my conscious awareness. As a matter of fact, I’ve been consciously choosing to buoy my spirit by concentrating my focus toward every good thing that I’ve been blessed with over my lifetime.
Will has been fielding phone calls to answer questions from loved ones, who have tuned into the grapevine. Most of my family in the Midwest. have been given no clue, as of yet, that my diagnosis has darkened from pneumonia to something more serious. And we’ve contacted none of our out-of-town friends (except for those, who call hoping to hear that pneumonia is healing).
Mentally, I am successfully challenging my attitude to hold my spirit afloat by truly living in the moment until Monday, when we expect to receive definitive results concerning last Wednesday’s bronchoscopy. So far, I’ve managed to hold a flood of anxiety at bay.
Love and laughter continue to be my most effective medicines—and in town family and friends have been surprising me with treats in hopes of whetting my appetite with the likes of iced mochas and scones. Dear friends, winter visitors, who are in town, are bringing dinner, tonight.
Will and our sons fill my heart with appreciation of my good fortune, and Ravi’s funny antics and precocious conversations are as naturally entertaining as can be, and being that I’m fully aware of feeling grateful, my plan is to keep my mind focused on the fact that everywhere I turn, our circle of love keeps my heart smiling with sincerity (though if I added serenity that would prove to be quite a stretch of my imagination, for sure..🙋🏻♀️🌈
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