The Supreme Court (based in the fact that The Senate chose to
Disregard the disrespectful nature of his responses to questions
Referencing his alleged attack upon Dr. Ford's person) was
Exacerbated by trump's public ridicule of Dr. Ford's 'forgetful'
Testimony, the inter-related nature of those events triggered
My most recent episode of PTSD; however, I'm relieved to
Acknowledge that this most current episode did not spin
My psyche toward spiraling so deeply into my own experiences with
Sexual assault, long past, as to dredge up additional layers of
Repressed terror, and here's how I know that deeper truth is true—
Though current events roused repressed anger to spill out of
My depths, compelling my entire being to expel
Emotional reactions, which, feeling self propelled, emerged
As though all on their own, over these last several days, not once did
I feel so personally distraught as though confusing Dr. Ford's
Experience with my own—in short, in hindsight, I clearly see
My reaction as leaning closer to compassion than
Empathy, suggesting a significant step-by-step approach toward
Change for the better sinking ever more deeply within the
Injured portion of my psyche, in fact ...
The balanced nature of my recent reaction centered my sense of clarity
(Upon viewing Dr. Ford's humbled dignity under oath as
Compared to kavanagh's and trump's paucity of such admirable
Character traits) upon triggering my psyche's anger (rather than
Anxiety) to spike, and the fact that my book group gathered to
Discuss a novel, THE GREAT ALONE, by Kristin Hannah, which
Explores commonalities of dysfunctional relationships that inevitably
Evolve within families when negatively charged emotions, secreted
Under the rug, are continually silenced by fear of causing a bully’s fury
To erupt, shattering the fragile illusion of peace that sits gingerly atop
Sudden volcanic explosions of brutality (awaiting each next minute
Infraction of the unspoken rule concerning who reigns supreme) to expel
Molten lava from within the very bowels of a bully, whose untamed
Tantrums, based in emotional immaturity, are set free to impose
Terrorized limits upon anyone whose vulnerabilities quake with
Fear as soon as the self-proclaimed ruler over all so much as hears
The mouse squeak or the chick peep, and as that storyline served to
Fan the fires of my memory (of my grandma's reign of terror)
Reigniting my frustration concerning the hastily contrived kavanagh
Appointment, the intuitive portion of my processor
(Recalling my episode of Takotusubo of two years ago), sat me down
At the computer, over these past few days, in order to flush out
And relieve my entire being of the natural emergence of
Long repressed rage that poured forth from within the depths of
My self respecting core in such a productively pro-active heart-healthy
Manner as to release layers of negatively charged emotion, which
Having remained tightly coiled over many years, proved in need of
Objective review at such a syncopated pace as to keep my promise to
Will that I’d not untap deeply repressed layers of anger so quickly as
To spring a gaping leak in my Line of Emotional Self Control, alerting
My adrenal glands to secrete an over production of self protective
Adrenaline, which, upon geysering out as had happened once before
Would surely overwhelm the pounding nature of my heart to
The point of paralyzing my lower (left) ventricle, landing me in
The ER, yet again, and thus do we come to see how time
Spent in reflective solitude invites negatively charged
Emotion, repressed for sound reason at an earlier time, to friend
My psyche’s well balanced connection to hindsight, which
Automatically switches the spotlight of insight from off to on—
Ohhmm ...
And thus does it become plain to see why so many lay people, like
You and me, have need to know that 'forgetfulness' on the part of
Victims (who unknowingly remain subconsciously haunted by
Deeply repressed memories of emotional, physical and/or sexual abuse) is
Based in our defense system's self-protective manner of siphoning off
Details that would otherwise cause the conscious portion of a person's
Wounded psyche to shrink back from social interactions that
Prove essential to moving forward, successfully, from
One stage of life to the next, and perhaps (as happened to
Me), this pre-programmed safety measure, which, presenting as
A natural force of nature, signaled Dr. Ford's defense system to repress
The sexual attack on her person so as to free the conscious (surface)
Portion of her brain to function 'normally' (whatever that means) in the
Aftermath of a terrifying attack, while internally, her brain had
Continued to harbor the lasting effects of feeling haunted by undiagnosed
Symptoms of PTSD, answering why so many victims of abuse
Fail to come forward to voice their truth for decades until
They, like me, have gained the courage to re-live yesteryear’s
Most deeply painful, perplexing memories in order to
Reclaim chunks of their self esteem, which, like mine, had been
Ripped away before we came to understand the crucial importance
Of developing and honoring the existential nature of
A pair of character traits that rise above commonly held dictates of
Authority, namely: Self respect and Self worth—neither of which
Can be as deeply absorbed within your psyche or mine as we may
Think until our adult processors, acting like looms, have spent
A goodly amount of time weaving together a host of widely coveted
Personal traits in so mature a manner (of listening and speaking) as to
have created a personal tapestry that proves self assured for such
Sound reason that no one can put asunder—
Hmmm ...
As my generation (and yours) is held accountable for carving a path
Of personal safety until precious children, like Tony, Ray and Ravi
Develop a matured sense of emotional security so as to provide
Tomorrowland with open-minded, well-balanced leaders, we can see why
My power of intuition (which communicates clearly with the conscious and
Subconscious portions of my mind and thus knows me inside out) took it
Upon itself to guide each of my sons to develop a healthy respect for
The opinions of others, inclusive of women, by encouraging each one to
Participate freely and wholeheartedly in mutually advantageous, respectful
Discussions with—me, so that as a result of our interactions we each
(Simultaneously) developed the courage necessary to stand up and
Respectfully voice our existential truths aloud whenever any of us feels
Bullied by others, whether those bullies be 'frenemies', teachers, deans
Colleagues, neighbors or embers of our extended family, who have not had
The good fortune to absorb Five Communication Tools that continue to
Provide our immediate family with the agile awareness of setting
A high value upon each other’s deeply considered personal points of view so as
To listen humbly (and thus astutely) to perspectives that may prove to be
More expansive, experientially, than one's own, and as the absorption of
Listening skills and speaking skills is considered a highly valued asset by our
Family's ‘All for one and one for all' attitude, we are often seen
Brainstorming, together, toward resolving conflicts that are bound to arise as
Simplistic situations grow ever more complex, based in the fact that
Our family of five has continued to bear fruit and multiply, suggesting why
It's imperative that conflict resolution tends toward being easy breezy
Rather than growing hot, bothered and long winded, over time—
Ohhmm ...
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