Circa 1941
Finally, it is Saturday night. A night made for fun. And if anyone knows how to have fun, it's Jack.
Jack, the ever upbeat guy with twinkling blue eyes, pays his way into the dance, and upon entering the ballroom, he stands at the edge of the dance floor, tapping his foot, blond head turning this way and that, checking out the women, floating here and there in the arms of other men, until finally, the music stops. Upon spying Jennie, Jack's head snaps at attention; his eyes stop roving and his legs begin to move, first around this couple, then around that one until he stands directly behind her.
When Jennie had first caught his eye, she'd been dancing, smiling up at a tall, dark, handsome guy. By the time Jack had crossed the room, the guy, who'd left Jennie to fetch them both a glass of punch, had lost his prize to my father's good-looking, quick-witted charm.
Upon approaching Jennie from behind, Jack's tap on her shoulder makes the raven haired beauty spin around, and before she stops spinning, the band begins to play, signalling Jack to say—Hello Gorgeous, this is our dance—whereby he sweeps Jennie, with the soft brown eyes, full red lips, and lush curves into his embrace, where my mother, head spinning at this guy's audacity, can't help but laugh, and as my dad can certainly cut a rug, his eyes locks into hers, cementing the fact that their dance continues over the next sixty years :)
After spinning this beauty around the dance floor for a short while, Jack says: You know what? I'm hungry. Let's grab a bite.
April 22, 2014
I tossed and turned last night
At first I didn't know why
Then anger emerged and insight hit:
Though I felt awful, reflection suggests that
I've been approaching change for the better
By processing through a painful stage of transition
(No pain no gain)
Remember my saying I take on the pain of others?
Remember my saying (several posts back) that
Recently, I'd listened to
My best traits being disparaged aloud?
Well, though that saddened me, deeply
The strength of my Line Of Control has trained my brain to
Restrain my pain behind a self respecting wall
I mean, due to the circumstances, maintaining my dignity
While constraining my emotional reaction
Was right on the mark
On the other hand, containing my ire under fire
Does not equate with maintaining my cool, forever
And this insight points to the fact that
The lid, which my self disciplined mind had
Placed upon my growing sense of internal combustion
Had blown off, last night
And here's why that's a very good thing:
While lasting sadness is energy depleting
Justifiable anger proves as energizing as it's liberating
And my therapist has been encouraging me to break through
The empathetic wall that blinds my conscious mind from
Recognizing those times when I feel beholden to
Serve the needs of others while
Finally, it is Saturday night. A night made for fun. And if anyone knows how to have fun, it's Jack.
Jack, the ever upbeat guy with twinkling blue eyes, pays his way into the dance, and upon entering the ballroom, he stands at the edge of the dance floor, tapping his foot, blond head turning this way and that, checking out the women, floating here and there in the arms of other men, until finally, the music stops. Upon spying Jennie, Jack's head snaps at attention; his eyes stop roving and his legs begin to move, first around this couple, then around that one until he stands directly behind her.
When Jennie had first caught his eye, she'd been dancing, smiling up at a tall, dark, handsome guy. By the time Jack had crossed the room, the guy, who'd left Jennie to fetch them both a glass of punch, had lost his prize to my father's good-looking, quick-witted charm.
Upon approaching Jennie from behind, Jack's tap on her shoulder makes the raven haired beauty spin around, and before she stops spinning, the band begins to play, signalling Jack to say—Hello Gorgeous, this is our dance—whereby he sweeps Jennie, with the soft brown eyes, full red lips, and lush curves into his embrace, where my mother, head spinning at this guy's audacity, can't help but laugh, and as my dad can certainly cut a rug, his eyes locks into hers, cementing the fact that their dance continues over the next sixty years :)
After spinning this beauty around the dance floor for a short while, Jack says: You know what? I'm hungry. Let's grab a bite.
April 22, 2014
I tossed and turned last night
At first I didn't know why
Then anger emerged and insight hit:
Though I felt awful, reflection suggests that
I've been approaching change for the better
By processing through a painful stage of transition
(No pain no gain)
Remember my saying I take on the pain of others?
Remember my saying (several posts back) that
Recently, I'd listened to
My best traits being disparaged aloud?
Well, though that saddened me, deeply
The strength of my Line Of Control has trained my brain to
Restrain my pain behind a self respecting wall
I mean, due to the circumstances, maintaining my dignity
While constraining my emotional reaction
Was right on the mark
On the other hand, containing my ire under fire
Does not equate with maintaining my cool, forever
And this insight points to the fact that
The lid, which my self disciplined mind had
Placed upon my growing sense of internal combustion
Had blown off, last night
And here's why that's a very good thing:
While lasting sadness is energy depleting
Justifiable anger proves as energizing as it's liberating
And my therapist has been encouraging me to break through
The empathetic wall that blinds my conscious mind from
Recognizing those times when I feel beholden to
Serve the needs of others while
Casting subconscious guilt upon
My desire to satisfy basic needs of my own, suggesting that
Undeserved guilt continues to hold
My 'sense of self' captive no matter how often
Intuition implores me to reconsider
A former state of mind that has not made sense for
Quite some time ...
And as I believe that all too often, logical thought
Is held captive behind walls of our own making
Undeserved guilt continues to hold
My 'sense of self' captive no matter how often
Intuition implores me to reconsider
A former state of mind that has not made sense for
Quite some time ...
And as I believe that all too often, logical thought
Is held captive behind walls of our own making
Perhaps you can see why I believe that
Grandma Bailey's intelligence was held captive
by dementia while
My anger was held captive by this subconscious belief:
I must take care to silence my voice if
That which I need to say wipes the smile off of a face I love
I must take care to silence my voice if
That which I need to say wipes the smile off of a face I love
Thank goodness, my conscious mind
Came to place a high value upon
Gaining insight into self awareness, because
Having chosen this mindful path as my own
Came to place a high value upon
Gaining insight into self awareness, because
Having chosen this mindful path as my own
I continue to liberate more of my innate intelligence
With every self respecting step I take …
As to last night, the wall, erected at a time when
I'd needed to remain connected to my wits rather
Than to my ire, came down, and insight suggests
That last night's pain, which
Had been repressed over these past few weeks
Is running through me, freely, catalyzing
My feeling more vulnerable than angry, today, and thus
In my present state of mind, it would be easy for
The misjudgments of others to hurt me, deeply until
Pain lessens in direct proportion to inner strength gained
And now that I've described this mental transition from pain to gain
Perhaps you can see why
Intuition has directed me to cocoon myself in solitude
Until the time is right for my voice to ring out with the truth
And if you ask what will make the time right, I'll reply
The time will be right when I can speak my truth, naturally, in
A compassionate (rather than an angry or empathetic) manner
Suggesting that I'll not bite off anyone else's head as
Had been done to mine at an exceptionally vulnerable time …
And I'll not mistakenly dump undeserved guilt on my own head, either
Once clarity, concerning both sides is mine
A balanced viewpoint, concerning the bigger picture, emerges in 3D
As to tomorrow—please tune in to see Jennie's self respect in action
With every self respecting step I take …
As to last night, the wall, erected at a time when
I'd needed to remain connected to my wits rather
Than to my ire, came down, and insight suggests
That last night's pain, which
Had been repressed over these past few weeks
Is running through me, freely, catalyzing
My feeling more vulnerable than angry, today, and thus
In my present state of mind, it would be easy for
The misjudgments of others to hurt me, deeply until
Pain lessens in direct proportion to inner strength gained
And now that I've described this mental transition from pain to gain
Perhaps you can see why
Intuition has directed me to cocoon myself in solitude
Until the time is right for my voice to ring out with the truth
And if you ask what will make the time right, I'll reply
The time will be right when I can speak my truth, naturally, in
A compassionate (rather than an angry or empathetic) manner
Suggesting that I'll not bite off anyone else's head as
Had been done to mine at an exceptionally vulnerable time …
And I'll not mistakenly dump undeserved guilt on my own head, either
Once clarity, concerning both sides is mine
A balanced viewpoint, concerning the bigger picture, emerges in 3D
As to tomorrow—please tune in to see Jennie's self respect in action
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