A POST MOTHER'S DAY HEARTFELT POST ...

“Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart.”
—CARL JUNG

Once again, I am reading a book about Jaqueline Kennedy.  Why once again?
Because, over the years, I've been drawn toward absorbing anything penned that may deepen my sense of insight concerning that which had caused the independent spirit of this courageous force of nature to develop such a deeply personalized sensitivity to artistic detail as to have elevated our First Lady's reputation to surpass Camelot's ‘haute coutured fashionista' in favor of being embraced as one of America’s most revered icons when considering the inner strengths of contemporary womanhood.

In addition to winning the world-wide admiration of heads of state, Jackie’s dazzling presence mesmerized the attention of 'the people' so that all she had to do to produce this mind-stunning effect was to walk into a room.  And each time her iconic presence had reason to comment or offer her opinion, glimpses of the caring nature of her heart were taken in by every ear graced with having absorbed the dignity of her self confident intellect's choice of words.

Quoting from the newest biographical study of Jacqueline Kennedy (which has recently been added to the portion of my library dedicated to the life and times of this high minded woman, whose place in American history is akin to royalty), I'd like to offer you the following excerpt from one of the essays comprising the revised and expanded edition of WHAT JACKIE TAUGHT US by Tina Santi Flaherty and Liz Smith:

“To many people, Jackie will be remembered forever as America’s queen, an icon and a touchstone for the wistful remembrance of 1960s culture and the Camelot dream. Yet she easily could have been merely a famous footnote to her husband, accorded no more recognition than that of any presidential wife. Why and how did Jackie leave such an indelible mark?

It begins with the fact that Jackie had a vision for our nation to which she held fast and would not let go. Just as President Kennedy declared a goal for America to put a man on the moon, Jackie imagined a transformed White House, alive with history and culture, and restored to its former glory as the First House of the land.  Within each of us lies our own vision for the way we want to live our lives. Like Jackie, we must recognize and hold fast to our dreams and refuse to be discouraged. One of Jackie’s favorite poets, W. B. Yeats, beautifully echoed these thoughts when he wrote:
“I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams ...”

Personally, I've held myself accountable to uphold Jackie’s personification of motherhood.  Though dedicated to public service by way of marriage to JFK, the dignified stance of our First Lady staunchly refused to adopt a quiet servile position whenever the subject at hand addressed the on-going welfare of her children.

"Seven years after they wed, Jackie Kennedy watched her husband give his inaugural address. She inhabited the role of first lady with grace, bringing poise and polish to her official duties and youth and a family center to the private side of the White House.

Mondadori Portfolio/Getty Images

Jackie was protective of young John-John and Caroline while they were growing up in the White House. The president would on occasion allow photographs of them when Jackie was out of town."

Just as the world clearly recalls William and Harry walking sorrowfully behind the casket of their beloved young mother, my heart still skips a beat each time I envision John-John saluting the casket in which his virile young father, slain in his prime, lay in state while the world at large mourned in disbelief, and I believe the strength of Jackie's dedication to motherhood—which reached far beyond those dark days when tragedy demanded the impossible of a deeply grieving, beautiful, young widow, who would, from that day forth, parent her children alone—is best expressed in her own words:

Interview with NBC News Correspondent Sander Vanocur at Hyannis Port, Mass., October 1, 1960. 

Jackie's heartfelt conviction that throughout her childhood she’d been made to feel like an afterthought was based in the insensitivity of this sad reality:  Both of her parents maintained a long list of priorities that came before any consideration of what was best for their daughter ...

I was a fortunate child in that my father lived and loved us well until his eighty-seventh year while my mother lived to celebrate and dance at her 100th birthday, and twas my good fortune to bask neath the sheltered warmth of their love and friendship over most of my life ...
💖I miss you, Mom and Dad, more than words can express ...

2018—HEAD ON COLLISION Part 1k

This morning, I awoke feeling mentally groggy (not again!)
And having learned to ‘listen to my body’
I refrained from attempting to clear my mind of
Irritants in hopes of penning a post that makes sense

At 11:30, we plan to attend a neighborhood party
After which I hope to return home, sit down at
My computer and scroll through old files until
The story, which is sure to freshen my conscious mind with
Insight laden details concerning the aftermath of our
Car crash, which nearly put out my lights, pops
Clearly into sight so as to recharge
My spirit’s energy level in the same way that
Munching on morsels of fresh whole grain bread offers
My physical energy level a lift each time I share my repast
With my fine feathered friends while feeding
My mind’s need to ponder ever more deeply upon
Some aspect of life that’s disrupting
My mental connection to inner peace ... and
Though feeling both pensive and groggy is
Contra-productive to socializing
I believe a bit of partying will do me good ...

2018—HEAD ON COLLISION Part 1j

By Jove!  A flash of insight has just brightened my mind so as to
Lighten my deeply pensive mood—Aaachoo!
(Though air quality is no better today than yesterday
My think tank feels like writing, so let's see if clarity pops out or not)
Though undergoing growth spurts (each of which resolved
An unidentified conundrum buried deep within my subconscious) had
Once felt as emotionally painful and draining as when
The self-degrading experience had originally taken place, this
Current growth spurt sees my brain feeling calmly pensive, which
Is a change for the better, because
That had not been the case in the past when
Pent-up frustration, reeling stormily deep within my mind, had
Coughed up a subconscious attitude made up of
Closed-minded postulates, which had been drummed into
My head, repeatedly, such as:  No pain-no gain
And as I'm sure that that truism has been
Hammered into your head, too, let's see why
Today's Aha! moment serves to spotlight
Sound reason for us to reconsider society’s postulates, together:
First of all, no matter how well-educated we prove to be
We do not know what we do not know as of yet
And that deeper truth suggests another in that
Rules of thumb are not written in stone—
For example:  I wonder how long it took to
Disprove mankind’s false belief regarding
The world being flat, and having learned that I’d believed
Many statements about myself, which have
Proved false, my power of intuition suggests reconvening with
Mother Nature from time to time most especially when
I feel need of solitude within a peaceful place where
Postulates, deemed right or wrong by society, may be reconsidered
And as my need for solitude often sees me at the duck pond, feeding
Bite-sized portions pulled from a loaf of whole grain bread to
My fine feathered friends, you may question why
I bring bread that's fresh and wholesome while conjuring up
Food for thought for each of us to consider, and here would be my reply:
It's my habit to munch along with my feathered friends whenever
My conscious mind—hungry for clarity, which calms and resolves
My subconscious power struggles—feels need to
Grow ever more expansive in hopes of deepening my brain’s
Connection to inner peace, which, in turn, broadens my sense of
Free choice each time my conscious awareness digests another
Bite-sized morsel of intuitive insight after ‘conversing’
Openly and honestly with you—wherever in
This wide, wide world you may choose to be ...

PS
As I plan to publish today's post right after penning this postscript
I'll not be surprised to find, upon rereading it on the morrow, that
Editing for clarity will be necessary—Aaachoo!
And having said that, I'll end for today on an up note by stating that
After only one practice Ravi's first soccer game (which proved
Even more comically chaotic than practice, as two teams vied for the ball) was
Lots of fun for everyone involved, most especially because
Goals were not counted, suggesting why no one felt like
A loser, freeing every child's spirit to run off the field, feeling like
A winner, who was eager to sit down with teammates, who were
Creating a brand new circle of friendship where
Buddies, indulging in oranges sliced with love, offered
Each other high fives, all around ...

Following the Pied Piper—time to get team shirts!

You can kick toward the goal or toward your family—right?

Tackle soccer, anyone?

2018—HEAD ON COLLISION Part 1i

Geez—
I can't remember a time when
An allergy attack combined with a heat wave
Made such a muddle of my think tank as to
Scramble my connection
To clarity like eggs, frying in a pan

Upon arising this morning
Intuition guided me to reread
The last two posts published
And thank goodness I listened, because
I found my think tank to be even more
Muddled than I'd thought!

With intent to unmuddle that which made
Little sense, portions of yesterday's post were
Revised, and as my brain's dizzied sense of
Clarity can do little more than guide me to
Blow my nose, I'm about to offer
My head, which feels like a ballon
A day of peaceful repose—Aaachoo!

PS
Ravi's first soccer practice was a hoot
Rules were greatly simplified and
Instruction on the part of
Cheerful coaches was clear:
(No hands on the ball
Run up and down the field
Try to kick the ball into the goal
No goalie in sight)
As one would expect
Mini teammates remained as comically confused as
Was true of the Keystone Cops
Even so, it was plain to see that
Coaches and children, alike, were having a 'ball' while
Three year old munchkins, running up and down the field
Had very little clue as to how to direct the ball into the goal
On the other hand, four year old teammates, who
Had played last year, role modeled
An experienced sense of this simplified game

As to Ravi, she fell in love with her cleats at first glance
And as photos below show, my granddaughter at three and a half
Sports a body so strong and tall that her coordination is a match for
Children who have turned five—so, as long as Ravi's spirited desire to
Play soccer proves as strong as her body seems ready and able
I'll place my reservations aside ...

Personal pride

Cooperation

Physical activity

Friendship

2018—HEAD ON COLLISION Part 1h

Wow!
I can’t remember a time when
Writer’s block, born of unnamed inner tension
Dominated my desire to
Pen posts for this long

As today was the first day that my power of
Intuition awakened my brain’s connection to
Readiness to reread my last post
(Suggesting that insights were added as per my pattern)
I see this change-for-the-better as a sign that
My recent state of mental lethargy, which is holding fast
Has been exacerbated by a full blown allergy attack, which
Filling my think tank with allergens, heightens
My sense of physical irritation while lowering
My mental acuity even more than before
Now, if you add that reality to the fact that I've been
Making my way through another mental growth spurt then
You can see why I am asking you to fortify
Your connection to patience while
The intuitive portion of my think tank continues to
Ponder naturally, calmly and thus methodically on
Its own so as to convert feelings of
Subconscious confusion into a reorganized
Conscious train of thought, which will emerge as
A string of inter-related insights that will
Surely secure my reconnection to
Clarity, based in common sense, by and by ...

As for now—I'm off to the park to watch
Three year old Ravi's very first soccer practice—which
On one hand, should prove to be hysterical to see—while
On the other, I feel conflicted about
Preschoolers engaging with team sports
However, if I had a third hand to hold out
You'd see a miniature Ravi standing in the center of
My open palm, asking to play soccer, which has been
The case for the past couple of months, and
Focusing in upon that reality offers my think tank
Sound reason to withhold judgement until I see
My granddaughter on the playing field for myself ...

2018—HEAD ON COLLISION Part 1g

As posted yesterday, a trio of frustrations has been bugging me, this week
However, upon awakening, today, my intuitive powers shone
The spotlight of insight upon a deeper truth that suggests
Those surface (conscious) frustrations do not comprise
The primary source of mental tension, which, stressing
My sense of inner peace, has been running interference with
My desire to write, and here's how I know that to be true:
Episodes of writer's block (referencing storytelling) are
Actually due to subconscious frustration, which
Having surfaced, today, concerns the conscious decision I'd made
Months ago, to retire 'the fixer’, who resides inside my think tank, and
Thus does today's insight spotlight this fact: ''The fixer', who calls
My think tank home, is still in conflict with my think tank's sense of
Logic, which has absorbed this classic fact of life:
I can't 'fix' defensive reactions that unbalance any psyche but my own

With today's insight in plain sight
The restoration of my mental clarity will
Inspire my processor to relax as I place my faith in
The natural emergence of my brain's intuitive powers, which
With patience intact, will guide me toward resolving
This mind-boggling inner conflict (between
Subconscious emotion and logic) that had unknowingly
Uncentered my connectedness to mental balance, which
Came undone when a pair of nonproductive attitudes had slipped
Silently through my wall of denial, blocking
My conscious sense of clarity from identifying
The emergence of a warlike emotion and the resurrection of
My fixer's self delusional super powers wrestling for dominance over
My processor upon witnessing a child, whose
Sweet vulnerability has won my love, being misused as a pawn —

AHA!—Guess what just dawned on me?
Once today's intuitive string of insights flashed through
The intuitive portion of my brain, my processor re-connected with
Clarity offering me sound reason to absorb this next insight:
Inner conflict is a power struggle that we have with ourselves—
In one corner of the ring, we feel a subconscious uprising of emotion
In the opposing corner, we feel a consciously calming sensation of logic
And guess what takes a hike while emotion and logic are actively wrestling?
Clarity, necessary to restoring a resourceful sense of inner peace, suggestive of
This next insight:  A well balanced sense of objectivity can not emerge until
Faith in the natural emergence of our intuitive powers soothes
The subconscious portion of our processors to calm down so as to
ffee the conscious portion of our processors to receive
Additional insights, spotlighting a long range plan of action, which
Having successfully blended emotion peaceably with logic, releases
Our think tanks from that wrestling match, born of
Inner conflict, and each time inner conflict resolves
Mental tension lightens up, and inner peace is naturally restored

As today's stream of intuitive insights has offered us
More than a mouthful of food for thought to digest, concerning
The subsconscious nature of power struggles, which are in need of
Identifying at times when deeply repressed emotion (filtering through
Our walls of denial) wrestles with our brains’ conscious connection to
Logical thought processing until we choose to calm ourselves by
Placing our faith in the emergence of intuitive powers known to
Convey simple plans of action, which, being positively focused
Make such good sense as to relax nonproductive attitudes from
Vying for dominance deep within our think tanks, and
With today’s complicated train of thought clearly stated
Let's look forward to the next time we meet when my power of
Intuitive thought will have had whatever time proves necessary to
Convert an uprising of unresolved subconscious frustration into
The emergence of additional strings of insight, which
With readiness, will surely continue to spotlight sound reasons to
Breathe a sigh of relief as proves true each time our brains, feeling
Freed from unidentified inner tension, openly and thus wholly
Welcome the soothing nature of having blended
Emotion with logic, which, with patience intact, restores
A well balanced sense of inner peace, all around ...

2018—HEAD ON COLLISION Part 1f

So— three things are bugging me, today:

1.  I still feel need to simplify HEAD ON COLLISION Part 1d

2.  Years ago when memory was fresh, I wrote the story of our auto accident, and thus far, I’ve not been able to find that file in my hard drive.

3.  Ever since Sunday, my iPad has gone crazy, so I’ve been working on my computer and iPhone until my appointment with the Genius Bar takes place, tomorrow, Thursday.

Over these past several days, intuition has been guiding me to hold off on penning anything new until this trio of frustrations has been resolved, freeing my mind to think clearly and thus, productively, again.

So—I appreciate your hanging in there with me ...