AWAITING MONDAY

 Man plans and God laughs

That’s what we say

When plans don’t go our way

Which was true

Yesterday and

Today, which

As you know, is

Mother’s Day

On Saturday

David drove in from

The coast, arriving

Safe and sound

As planned

However

Our plan for

Fun in the sun

Fell apart after

Steven dropped off

Ravi, who declared

She’d like to

Sleep for

A hundred years

Seriously—

What seven year old

Says something

Like that on

The day that

A favorite uncle has

Arrived in town and is

Ready to play?

A seven year old with

A fever, no less

And as Steven was

Attending

A memorial service

We snuggled Ravi up

Under the comforter in

Our king sized bed where

Good as her word

She fell right to sleep

And as Ravi was

Still under

The weather, today

Our plan for

Mother’s Day

Changed, as well

Since Steven only

Stopped by for

A short spell as

Ravi was not

Happy at having to

Remain at home so

After Steven left

Our home

Will, David and I

Decided to

Enjoy dinner at

A favorite restaurant

Thus keeping

We three happily

Occupied so as

Not to have

Too much

Down time after

FaceTiming with

Barry’s family

Being that tomorrow

We expect to

Receive

The pathologist’s report

Concerning

Last Thursday’s

Ultrasound/biopsy, so—

With hopes that

Your Mother’s Day

Has been both

Happy and healthy

Let’s say

Good luck

Good night

Sleep tight

🙋🏻‍♀️Annie

AND WE WAIT …

 Though positive focus

 Continues to buoy

My strong sense of hope

I’ll not say

My head space feels

Utterly peaceful, today

As to my spirit

Tis my good fortune that

David is driving in from the coast

And Ravi is coming to play

🙋🏻‍♀️😊Annie

YESTERDAY’S ULTRASOUND

 If nothing had shown up on yesterday’s ultrasound then a biopsy would not have been necessary, because it’s impossible to biopsy nothing.

If nothing had shown up on yesterday’s ultrasound then the uptake of radioactive dye, creating a hot spot of concern on my PET scan, would have been due to a pocket in the soft tissue that offered naught to worry about.

As the ultrasound technician did see something of concern so obvious as to have been visible to me, she called in the interventionist radiologist (and Will) while I steeled myself for bad news.

Upon examining my ultrasound images, which clearly showed a small subcutaneous mass on my left flank (my right lung having been removed), I’d believed the radiologist’s diagnosis would lean heavily toward metastases, and thus was I giddily relieved to hear this specialist, who views countless ultrasound images, say, “This looks like a sebaceous cyst to me, but we’ll biopsy it in order to be certain.”

A sebaceous cyst— 

Who woulda thought!

Oh—please let it be!

At least we’ve received

A welcome reprieve

So as to truly celebrate

Mother’s Day with

Family and friends

Feeling as though

We’d all dodged a bullet

Though

We’ll not really

Breathe easy till

The pathology report

Has been read and received

Most likely on Monday

🙋🏻‍♀️Annie

😊Whew!

Thank goodness for

A surprise as sweet as

The possibility of

Nothing more than

A sebaceous cyst

IT’S SOMETHING OR NOTHING?

 This afternoon with

Ravi was so much

Fun that

Tomorrow’s

Ultrasound/biopsy

Did not

Come to mind

Even once!

This child is really

Good for me!

Hopefully

We’ll enjoy

Many more birthdays

Together

In the years to come

🙋🏻‍♀️😊Annie

LET’S SAVE THE GOOD NEWS FOR LAST

 Good news and bad news. Let’s save the good news for last.

My surgeon and oncologist agree that a shadow seen on my most recent PET scan is in need of investigation.  So, an ultrasound has been ordered, and if the ultrasound cannot put a name to this shadow then a biopsy will be performed while I’m still on the table.

It’s going to be nothing or it’s going to be something.

Not the news I was hoping to receive or pass on.

My most recent Chest CT and PET scan will be presented, next week, for review at Mayo’s tumor conference.

As to the good news, my thoracic surgeon (who is aggressive—not  a wait-and-see person) is of the opinion that leans toward this ‘shadow’ not being malignant.

As for me, I’m feeling conflicted though my positive attitude is definitely voting in favor of my surgeon’s optimistic opinion unless the ultrasound proves otherwise.

On an up note, my physical therapist, Katrina, is very encouraged by my percentages as she continues to administer tests, which will offer us a baseline concerning my balance and endurance.  As of now, I’m not at risk of falling.

My ultrasound is scheduled for this coming Thursday.  Happily, Ravi will be with us on Wednesday, and thus will our minds be occupied with magical thoughts.

🙋🏻‍♀️Annie

RADIOLOGY RESULTS, TODAY

 This morning will see

Me holding Will’s hand as

We sit, side by side, while

 Discussing radiology results with

My oncologist and

Thoracic surgeon followed by

My appointment for

Physical therapy at Mayo

So please—all positive thoughts

Wishing me well—literally

Physically

🙋🏻‍♀️Annie

CHEST CT SCAN

 It’s no wonder that

My storyteller has been

On hiatus while most of

My brain space has been

Quietly focusing upon

The here and now concerning

How best to create a memorable

Seder (while considering

My lack of energy) for beloved family

And treasured friends

After which you and I have watched

My brain space peacefully awaiting

Radiology results that will

Declare me cancer-free or

Not

🙋🏻‍♀️Annie